Graves : (

z

 

I'm up, but it's not that late. What do you do to make bacon?

 

put it on a frying pan...and turn the burner on and fry it

 

What? No olive oil? Your bacon must be crunchy and less tasty. I imagine it would also stick to the frying pan.

Now that we've cleared that up, what's your occupation?

 

I work at a guest service department at a ski resort in Colorado.

you know what is really good? Turkey bacon

 

Guest service department at a ski resort in Colorado, huh. I imagine that'd be a pretty sweet job. How many guests at a ski resort in Colorado are in need or service at 4:30 in the morning? Since you're busy "working" on the forums, i'd hazard a guess at not very many at all.


And what the fuck is turkey bacon? Bacon comes from a pig. "Turkey bacon." What the fuck? Did the splice a pig with a turkey? Or just genetically engineer a turkey with four asses belonging to pigs?

 

I guess it's just turkey cut into a bacon-shaped slice. There's not much to do at 5am, but give wake up calls....thats about it
It snowed for the first time today, yaaaaaay

 

...I see. Well, i suppose TGK would enjoy it. And possibly the pope.

 

haha

 

I've devised a cunning plan. I'm going to kidnap the Pope, and get him to stand down and name me the new Pope on camera. I'll also get him to say that i must not be punished in any way shape or form. Since the Pope's word is law, i will become the new Pope, with absolutely no concequences. Then i will abolish Christianity, although not before securing myself safe passage to Cuba, along with fifteen virgins of my choice, ten trillion dollars in a caymann islands bank account, and a year's supply of doughnuts.

*insert evil douchebag laugh here*

 

What time is it for you guys?
I guess it's a good thing I'm a night owl, so it wasn't hard for me to stay up all night. It just sucks, I'm moving tomorrow, so I have to power nap then finish packing and move....at least I don't have to work tomorrow

 

It's nine to the thirty Pee emM here in Melbourne. And just burn some speed for breakfast and you'll do fine.

 

I think I'll take a Unisom before I head home to make me drowsy so i can fall asleep. I'm wide awake...

 

Or you could take some no~doz (caffiene pills) and pull an all nighter and not be such a pansy.

 

fuck that. I need some sleep, or I'll be a zombie tomorrow

 

Personally i love them. Plus they're right in front of the counter, so all you have to do is ask for a packet of cigarettes and pocket the whole row of them while the Indian's back is turned.

 

Clearly. It's so pathetically easy to gank shit from servos. And even if you get caught, you can always talk circles around the stupid Indians and get out of it.

 

one time, this guy who was in my car went into a gas station and stole something stupid, like blunts. And I didn't know what he was doing and he ran into my car with the cashier dude chasing him and my car out of the station.
i didn't like being the "getaway" car...not at all

 

That's just dumb. They have cameras and everything, they probably have your plates on camera, and the (po)lice are searching for you as we... type. If it were me I would have done exactly what you did, though. It's not as if you can get a mate fucked on for stealing. All you can do is not drive him anywhere next time.

 

yea, but it was like 5 years ago...so i'm sure i'm in the clear