For Females: is it somehow a double standard if a guy...

I'm not very interested in doing this personally, but very interested intellectually: It is totally cool with guys when women are into anal sex and play. But is there a double standard with men? I don't mean in the world, I mean in you. Be honest, please. Let me know if you think there is a little bit. If your guy wanted you to penetrate him, would that make him somehow less of a man to you? I understand some women just wouldn't be interested, but if you knew he was into that and had done it, would you in truth dislike it?

I read an interview with a porn star recently who said that the practice of a guy coming on a girl and then eating his come was disgusting. But i felt like, why? You do it! How many times have I been in my girl's mouth after being inside her, I thought. Or my finger. It didn't bother me at all. I didn't think it was gross. She didn't either. It's no big deal. So it got me thinking about double standards coming out of a homophobic society- not to say you are; this group attracts some pretty open minded people... but it's a social conditioning that can affect us. So it got me wondering about double standards in terms of things like that.

I'm particularly interested in whether women just feel it's a bit of a turn off to be with a guy who wants to take the "feminine" role... Thanks to all you beautiful women who have answered past questions. I'm a curious guy.

Enjoy! Thanks again...

 

sorry, what you put makes no sense you need to be a bit more clearer to get more answers xxx

 

Some people have weird taboos. However, I believe that the only way to surrender yourself to pleasure is to throw away your inhibitions and seek out that pleasure, no matter what form it takes. I'm an open-minded, bisexual woman, though, and that may make me a little biased...

I love anal play. I love anal sex. I love using a strap-on on a man or woman. I've fucked many men in the ass and I've never thought them less of a man for it. (I have considered them my slutty, little bitch created to please me, but that's a different story... ) I've asked and forced men to eat their own cum and I got off on it. I wasn't repulsed, I was turned on.

As far as femininity goes, I've had men dress up in females' clothing for me, yet, despite the garters and pantyhose and heels and corsets, I've never really considered them "feminine". But, there's a thrill in it. Any man who's comfortable enough with his own sexuality that he'll let me fuck him and dress him as a woman and carry out any other perverted thoughts that come into my head, then he has my respect, desire and attention. A man who's willing to experiment and try new things, including taking on a "feminine" role, is the sexiest kind of man for me.

I hope that answers a question or two...

 

I just Love BellaDonna's attitude, but personally i'm not that open-minded.. maybe it will change though
I enjoy anal sex and one of the biggest turn ons for me is to watch a guy masturbating on me and then to see them as they eat their own cum - that's pretty sexy!
But yeah, i wouldn't feel ok to wear a strap-on, maybe that's my inner insecurity with my own feminine role, i hope i'll get over it. i can imagine myself fucking a guy with a dildo or a strap-on, But i would like to do it with someone else, not my boyfriend, maybe some younger boy ( i like that thought ..haha)

but if my boyfriend wanted to try anal with another man, then that's alright with me, i wouldnt mind him being fucked or anything.. that wouldn't make him less of a man in my eyes.
so it's a bit complicated

 

Wow. Thank you for that well written and detailed response! You have really gotten past all the societal conditioning and taboos. So, it almost sounds like when you are with a man as your lover, you and he are just two people who experiment and see where it takes you. It sounds as if you are almost past the traditional roles, and you choose whichever suits your mood at the time.

But Bella_Donna, I wonder, does more "traditional" sex kind of bore you now? Since you're so open minded and experienced? I should probably define that but I don't know if i can exactly. Less creative sex, let's say. With a partner who wasn't as open minded as you.

Thanks again...

 

Well, it doesn't sound like you're all that repressed! I doubt anyone would call you old-fashioned.

 

LoL I only wish I'd gotten past all that conditioning and taboos! Yes, I've gotten past many, but I still wish to be more open-minded and less concerned with gender and protocol. But, I think I'm doing well, and hopefully, in time, I'll reach the point where none of it matters.

As for your question about "traditional sex". It's odd, because the other night, I was actually contemplating this. Due the fact that I've tried many things, I was starting to wonder if I'd gotten to the point where I need extremes to get turned on. Luckily, the answer is 'no'.

You see, I consider sex a hobby. I love to have sex, I love to invent new ways of getting aroused. I admit, novelty turns me on but I can just as excited about plain old missionary-style, one-partner, no-toys sex. Why? Because I am very creative and I fantasize constantly. I'm always coming up with new ways to get excited about things I do regularly.

Examples:

I love to wear clothes during sex. Just a pair of stockings or a pair of super-high heels or panties, that are just pushed to the side to fuck, create a whole different sexual dynamic. I also own a wide variety of wigs, and I can tell you, just a change of hair colour changes the entire atmosphere.

I love to talk dirty. I love communicating with my partner, and sometimes, just talking about sexy scenarios makes regular sex that much more hot.

Role-playing gets me off. Even if I don't tell my partner, I love to pretend I'm someone else in some other situation during sex. Sometimes, if I'm getting fucked from behind, I'll tuck my hands under my body, making me helpless. Then, I'll imagine that I'm being fucked by some stranger who's forcing himself on me.

Toys, toys, toys! I love my toybox. Sometimes, I'll bust out a bunch of different toys and play with as many as I can. Sometimes, I'll just use one. Just using a ball-gag, or vibrating cock-ring, or nipple clamps, can make all the difference in the world!

To me, every sex session is an oppertunity to have fun and be creative.

 

As far as Im concerned...the bedroom shouldnt have any rules....as long as no one gets hurt..unless thats what both parties are into....hahaha

 

I just keep picturing the breakup. Not because of the question you asked, but because it would be awkward and embarrassing if a couple broke up and the girl once got the guy up the butt. Girls tell their girlfriends EVERYTHING.

 

Many girls tell EVERYONE EVERYTHING.

Just keep reading here...

 

I know nobody is interested in the King of H&H's point of view ( ) but the only thing I am totally against is anal, on the ahem, receiving end. I am happy to experience as much as I can in this life, but that's not one of them!

 

I wouldn't be weirded out or anything, just sad that he'd have one unfulfilled want.
Bum-play just isn't my thing.

 

Yes, but that's what i'm saying. You have spoken to the double standard. In other words... why should it count against him? It doesn't with Bella Donna, and other members. But in general with the population in this culture... it would be like... oh, is he gay or something?

I could care less if a girl told her girlfriend she slapped me, grabbed my hair and rubbed her crotch against my face. Go ahead and tell. Let me know, too, so I can think of it the next time i smile at her.

 

That's a cute picture.