I like the stoned me more.

Hey guys... I'm sorry, but I have to get this off my chest... I haven’t' admitted this to anyone, and it kinda sucks knowing it... so what better place than to just say it to a bunch of anonymous strangers that I'll never meet, but are probably more like me than anyone else.



Lately I have come to terms with the fact that I actually like the "stoned" me more than the straight me... when I'm not stoned, I am irritable, not as happy, and probably not as nice as I am when I'm high... when I'm high, I actually listen to people, and feel equal to them... I'm much nicer to my family, and I feel like a happy, and good person.



when I'm not, I’m just another corporate geek, that sucks and obsesses over money and worthless crap... Perhaps I'm starting to see that there is a better person I should become... I wrote my "anti-drug" sister an email the other day while I was high.. and perhaps for the first time in my life, I told her I love her, and that she has inspired me in many ways... normally, I'm just an ass to her...



Anyhow, not sure if I'm venting, or seeing if I'm alone in being like this, or, perhaps I just needed to write it down, to understand it better..



peace guys

Soc

 

Well Im with ya, except for the obsession with money bit, and that I like the high and/or drunk me better. But other than that I feel pretty much the same way, like I feel that no one else is worth taking the time to talk to until I am high, then I am very social.

 

maybe you should read what ya just wrote.... and Learn from it!
strive to make the changes that you want.

 

maybe u should just be stoned 24/7...just a thought

 

that could get pricey, but it could be worth it.

 

hey guys... Well, I'm not sure about the being stoned 7/24 thing... might not work well, but, perhaps I needed to vent a bit, and like you said Willi,,,, perhaps its time to start to change things.....

Oh and, Relayer.. and when I say obsessed about money, I don't mean to a retarted degree.. I just mean working nasty hours. Along with a fulltime job, I also teach part time, just for extra dollars.. its not a big deal, but takes so much time away from my wife and kids... I feel crappy about it later (when I'm high , but, normally, I'm just stuck like most of the world is stuck... does that make any sence?

peace
Soc

 

Bro, I went threw the same shit. When I was blazed, I didnt give a fuck about stupid shit. When im sober, i always switch positions when im sitting down and shit and my mind is NEVER 100% focused on something because i always have the need to be moving around. When I blaze, I think, think, think and think. My mind is the only thing running on my body.


Now this is differant because im not stoned. But whenever I GET weed, and have it in my possesion knowing i can smoke it whenevr i want and just be happy, i always do things for others because im in such a good mood. Knowing whenever you want you can just go upstairs and blaze in your room is a good feeling. Thus, making me the nicest kid in the whole wide world.

 

I have to blaze up before I do everything, and im serious. If I go to work not high its shitty, if I go to school not high its shitty, but if I am HIGH then its all good. I feel you

 

EXACTLY!

 

"Is persecuting n****** better when stoned too?"

mynameishitler07 answer me that!

 

"Now this is differant because im not stoned. But whenever I GET weed, and have it in my possesion knowing i can smoke it whenevr i want and just be happy, i always do things for others because im in such a good mood. Knowing whenever you want you can just go upstairs and blaze in your room is a good feeling. Thus, making me the nicest kid in the whole wide world."

Me too i love the feeling of being able to go get baked whenever i want to

 

I'm always more able to feel better about myself when I'm blazed. I take that opportunity to "collect positive insights" so to speak. I mean, when I think positive thoughts about myself or others and I ask myself "Now why don't you think of things that way more often?" I usually "save" those thoughts. I try to remember them for when I sober up. When I'm sober, I think about them again and make an assessment: do they still make sense in my sober state of mind? If they do (and usually they do), I vow to myself to make it a permanent part of my attitude. Hopefully, that way, over the years, I'll slowly become more the person I want to be - the person I am when high.

 

dude your fucking stupid, if i get money stolen then I can say fuck you to whoever I want

lol grow up shitler

 

nice one

 

It works for me haha i just like BEING stoned more than being straight, idk if its nesissarily(sp?) me liking WHO i am when im high or straight. but i do know what you mean. I mean I kind of do like who i am when im high because i am nicer and i guess i just like how more relaxed and chill i am haha. well idk now u got me thinkin cuz im blazed right now so i hope u know wat i ment
peace brotha

 

me too. but the stoned me and the sober me is the same person, only the stoned me is happier. and i like that better.

 

im sorta the same way.... when im high im very friendly... i think about things all around not just selfishly, Overall i think weed helped me to be a nice person, like before i listend to heavy metal and now im into Pink Floyd and relaxing music.

Somepeople think alchohal is better then weed....are they stupid...to me yes.

 

Dude exactly. Whenever I get high my mind goes so fast and I think about so much shit in such little time. It's so weird lately if I get high and try to go to sleep I just can't fall asleep because I think SO much. My mind starts going a million mph and I start going through everything in my life all at once and it's just nuts.

 

hmn... i know where this is coming from. back when i just started smoking- if say i smoked heavily for a few days i would be really irritated when i would run out and know i wouldt blaze for a few days. its changed since my paranoya is almost COMPLETELY gone, i dunno- i got blitzed before school this morning and i didnt feel the slightest bit paranoid, being near 100's of sober people and teachers etc. now when im high i just smile for time being happy and shit. its sick cuz now im the same all the time, whether im stoned or not im still nicer to people.

 

my english class has a main teacher, and a helper teacher because theres a retarded kid in the class. im pretty sure the helper teacher was high today in class... everyone was 100% sure. she would laugh at nothing then draw pictures of random kids in the class, she was like, thats what you look like in chalk world.