Top Ten Signs you might be a Retarded Atheist....

I thought this might deserve its own thread in response to the thread in the Chrisitanity Forum called "Symptoms of Chrisitanity" discussing the top 10 signs you're a Christian...

Top 10 Signs you might be a retarded atheist.

10. You think the helpful social interaction & networking of churches is hopelessly "tainted" by irrationality and would never do anything like that on your own in a secular context.

9. You have infidels.org bookmarked, but haven't actually read more than 5% of its content.

8. Your only contribution to the evolution vs. ID debate was to post "its the creashionizm!1!!111!!lol!!" to someone's blog.

7. You talk trash about how bad Christianity is, yet never perform any volunteer work or give to any charities.

6. You target the quiet, humble "salt of the earth" Christians who are doing their best to be good people and teach by example rather than evangalize... and you call them names like "brainwashed"... driving them that much closer to fundamentalism.

5. You've convinced yourself that the universe really did pop into existence from nothing.

4. You're 50 to 100 lbs overweight, have the grooming habits of a warthog, and have the audacity to wonder why Christian guys "get all the chicks".

3. You find normal religious iconagraphy "offensive", but have no problem with slapping a bumper sticker on your car which reads "Fundamentalism stops a thinking mind."

2. You've never actually delved into any religion or read any atheist philosophers. You just call yourself an atheist because you're too lazy to go to church.

1. You actually fully believe in god (making you a THEIST), but call yourself an atheist because you're angry at god.

NOTE, this should be used as a lesson to be learned from. This isn't a bash on anyone in particular (Since this is my first real post, I haven't been here long enough to bash anyone (yet) hehehe) Also note that I'm an atheist.... and I'm only guilty of #4 so I'm not fully "Deet Dee Dee" retarded. :&

 

I'd say the main difference between the two lists is that the other one is actually clever and probably more accurate, though I've met Aethiests, who meet these descriptions. I really don't think you got much on the Aetheists, I've seen how at least the younger set argues on other sites, I've never seen one Christian win.

 

Like I said, I'd hope that athiests who read this DON'T do the things listed when they debate... To take this as something to think about before debating theists.

 

Nice post …Uh, don’t take this the WRONG way but I think you’re LAZY RETARDS!!!

You must be so proud of yourself. Typical egotistical, self righteous religious babble.

Go follow the God in your head off to some holly war, heaven is waiting for the likes of you.

 

WHo are you talking too?? If you're refering to the original post, it was posted by me, an atheist... So who's lazy, and why?

 

were lazy retards???...how on earth could we take that the wrong way....

 

Christian guys "get all the chicks".

[/QUOTE

yeah, like that happens.

 

OK, I’m retarded then cuz I don’t get it, I guess that explains your signature. I was pissed at this thread because I have to put up with so many high and mighty egomaniac christians that walk around with nose in the air, my blood boils every time I have to listen to the same self righteous bullshit that this lists just reeks of.

 

LOL... this list was created (as far as I know) by another atheist on another forum and I just brouoght it over here. Sorry if you took it the wrong way, but I was pretty sure I explained myself at the end of the post where I said....

Cheers.

 

Not the most thought out list is it ? I agree
but heres a good one to throw at those nutters who bow to the invisible man
http://www.godisimaginary.com

 

Oh man.. now that was a pretty good post heh.
Id add another one:
11: You actually think you are challenging Christianity by pointing out that Jesus was probably not 'White' as seen in Western Artists depictions.
12: You think Christianity is like something kids believe in because the last actual personal reference you have was when you were ten years old and in a Sunday school. You assume thats where everyone else left off.
13: You are not really an Atheist anyways but its an 'Internet Character' you portray because you actually believe its the easiest way to 'Troll' and 'screw with people'.

Meh.. not all gold but thought Id chip in something hehe.

 

I liked #11 although I haven't personally seen it. I think there might be a #13 on these boards LOL, I can't be sure though.

 

Isdarts.. u sound like me...[sorry ]

Whenever u wan to talk. Gimme a call.

occam

 

How so?

 

#14 You've joined the church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
#15 You were upset when Richard Dawkins hooked up with Mrs. Garrison in the lastest South Park episode.

 

How would joining the Church of the FSM make you retarded? the FSM site is nothing more than a satirical argument against ID being taught in schools. It basically says that if they want to teach ID, then other creation stories should get equal time.

I missed 15 although I probably would have just laughed LOL.

 

Using the argument makes sense. Claiming to be a member of the church, however...

On a side note, i actually googled the world "spaghetti" and the first thing that came up was church of the flying spaghetti monster. I guess there's a lot of us retarded athiests out there. Or at least testament to how mainstream these ideas are becomming.

If you're a south park fan you'd have loved the show. Seeing Mrs Garrisons deformed titties in Dawkins face was your typical south park taking it to far moment. It was very funny, i loved it.

 

Isdarts

LOL..Many of your comments are what this one would say.
But occam often feels like the messenger
Say like the one in 'Kingdom of heaven'
Knifed and beheaded by a fool calling himself a king.

Occam