But you don't actually remember doing it.. But yes, even when you obviously shouldn't, laughter is a release for alot of tension and heartache.. There's often much laughter at wakes, and nowadays, even funerals become a celebration of a person's life.. Not strictly a period of mourning anymore.. If you'd been a fully grown adult, it would have absolutely bizarre and sinister, but you weren't.. I have a question about how much you remember though.. You would have been stood with your younger sister.. Could it have been her that laughed, and not you? Is it possible you laughed because she did?
I know I Do Laugh in Unappropiate Situations...Such as in a Class Room When Everyone is Quiet...I will begin to Laugh Uncontrolably for No Apparant Reason...All the Time Cringing in my Head...Wanting to Stop but Can Not...AsEveryone is Looking at me... From the Day of my Fathers Funeral...I Can Only Remember two Seconds...One Sitting in the Chapel Place on a Bench...The Other Throwing Ash onto his Coffin... Two Brief for any Detail... I Shall Just Go Along with my mother says...Apparently I Laughed... I Wish I Had Not... But Even Now as an Adult...There is Always the Possiblity that I may Laugh in a Situation such as a Funeral...I know this From myself... I Feel Very Guilty for Having Laughed...It makes me Appear that I Do Not Care...When Everyone Else was mourning...
We shouldn't make light of this either, because, deny it or not, it effect things for the rest of your life... My own family have a reputation for being uncaring simply because they have a reputation for being uncaring... And now, sure enough.. They ARE uncaring... And I do know that you are not like that..
Sorry, my double negatives are playing up again... That's what I was trying to say.. But the longer you leave it to keep telling those that matter that you care, the harder it gets to sound like you mean it.. The harder it gets to believe.. and the harder you become..
laughter is just another way to release emotions... you were probably feeling so much that it was just how you had to let something out
Yep.. It is an involuntary reaction... And to a degree, so this the reason for that reaction... I can't beleive your mum has been so hard on you over it
If you can deal with intense art and raw emotion, read: Jokes and the Unconscious by Daphne Gottlieb and Dianne DiMasso. It has a scene about the protagonist and her brother laughing during their father's burial.
I remember, barely, a long time ago at one of my grandparents (can't remember which one, long time ago like I said) funeral. I laughed a very little bit, nothing loud enough for others to hear, it was more of a little smile and chuckle. It wasn't that I was happy at all, at the time I wasn't able to explain it. I'm still not sure if I was laughing as a way to release emotion, or if I was thinking of all the good times I had with them. Your story is a lot more tragic than mine, so laughing like that doesn't seem at all odd to me. Sorry for your loss.
i did the same thing at my fathers funeral.but it wasnt loud but i have come to figure that it was my minds way of trying to heal itself its kind of like when you get a cut it has to grow back.well when you are in another part of your mind you somehow have to come back.so mabey the reason for our actions was so we can deal with pain just a little differently from the rest.
