Cronik Pane-5-narks! Still N Pane!? HELP!

I dont know how I can be in pain after 2 years on pain meds, and still in such pain. doctors wont listen, Im also psych pat. Now I dont know what I am. Im sick I know it, but on welfare cant get the er docs to hear me when I say I seriously cant poop. first thing i tell them i am NOT here to get pain meds. I tell them I am sick and dont know whats wrong. I used to be a recreational user of lesser than I am prescribed now. Back when hydrocodone was fun and I still went out the house and wasnt in pain and now karma has bit me in the ass and I cant figure how long i will suffer from my past. My meds now are morphine er 60 two times day, oxycodone hcl 15mg up to 5 a day, methadone 40mg four times a day, valium 10 four times a day, baclofen 10 three times a day, ativan 1mg two times a day, trihexephenadryl 5mg three times day, effexor xr two 150mg capsules and one 75mg capsule all three together one time a day, adderall xr 15mg two times a day, lisinipril 10mg a day, synthroid 75mcg one a day, protonix 40mg one time day, supposed to take risperdal 1mg two times a day, only that makes pain worse, try to tell shrink that says im bipolor and have to take that. I tell shrink i try to take risperdal and makes me not able to stay awake. plus more pain. been to two neurologists who the first said chronic stuff mri said cervical spinal stenosis in the c6-7 and c5-6, then did emg of upper ext. showed abnormal, did emg of lower bilateral ext. showed in needle test that abnormal, yet the neurologist said in report to 'ignore technical test results due to poor voulentary patient effort" says chronic condition. seen neruosurgen said no surgery cause would only make worse, degenerative cervical disc disease, and then another nerosurgeon who was going ot help not with meds already have meds, as i said above, i want answer to what is making this pain and why the meds dont help like people say that I should be high only i am not high at all and am only in bad pain. when desperate take ibuprofen over the counter and makes me not feel well or sleep for like 20hours. I have lost all friends all of them, none understood why I couldnt 'share' cause i only get enough for one month exactly and dont get high to say the least. i used to type out pages of journals and on line, now this one post make my shoulders so bad hurting and still for last two months cant feel my right hands and cant feel my fingertips trying to pick up a pill only to drop it over and over. I take now at least exlax by the 5's, colace, surfak, miralax, correctol, magnesium citrate, fleets enemas, suppositories, Ive tried the fent patch but even with the tagaderm cover and the oxy and morph, pain when the patch ownt stay on my skin, and fall off too early or when sweat. I swere I am not in anything ot get high and i am sick and all i want is to not be in horrible pain but dont know what else to even ask to try to take and have no one to call and the pain makes me so depressed and then ppl seem to get the idea I am on this meds and having all sorts of fun and they are jealous of the pills and by now they dont even get the fact im so dragged down sick and in pain that i have not a clue to who or what i am even anymore.

I guess to skip all that above i am turning to what else could help the pain besides what i have been on and am on now. now : morphine, oxycodone hcl, methadone.

Been on : hydrocodone, percocet, fentynal patch (duragesic brand, mylan, sandoz) none would stay stuck to me. tylenol 3, tylenol 4, etc.

I am just in so much pain and feel like i at least should know why and if I am not dying like they say i am not then can the cervical disc disease cause this much pain and without surgery and now no feeling in my right hand and been sleeping in a chair for last two years with a hospital bed in my bedroom and cant sleep in it or anyghing. I serious dont knwo what else to try and ask to take for pain or what to do about this and it is makein gme insane mreo than I am already diagnosed and that is not even an issue any more i cnat live in this pain. no one listens. i have more than i have ever had from being in institutions of insanity to being homeless and at least then I had my physlical health and now its gone and i dont think or know how ot get ti back .

 

I'm not a doctor but taking that many meds daily is bound to have some side effects. Some people have benefited from medical marijuana for pain management, its not directly a pain killer but may help in dealing with the pain. Maybe some else around here is more knowledgable on this and can offer more/better advice. Hope you find some way to feel better.

 

holy fucking shit im high as hell and that post tripped me the FUCK out. holy shit dude, the most i have ever taken is aspirin when i get a headache. dude those medicines all sound insane wtf dude thats crazy what would happen if u took no pills? dude where do u get enough money.

 

I am not sure how long I have been taking medications, almost about 14years. I end up my loosing time and having a dissociative identity disorder or multiple personality's and post traumatic stress disorder and am on social security disability since I first went and checked in to the psych unit from a breakdown and thought I was doing something to help myself go on in the nursing field of study and then was taking no medicine. Then I tried, only so much has passed since back then, now am almost unable to leave the home and even that is so anxiety inducing that I get 'lost' now i am trying ot survive. My family is just evil in some ways.

I am having a really difficult time with confusion and agitation and back in the day they kept giving me more and more thorazine and haladol and navane and all that stuff when i could not handle my emotions and never once did we ever talk about the time I was held hostage, or kidnapped later down the road or even the abuse and all the things that led up to the breakdown. Night terrors and flashbacks daily and that makes the pain worse and like you said about money. Well I did work for as long as i was allowed to do so and when i was 21 retired and applied for disability and so all the money i paid in for from age 15 to age 21 now i end up getting a bit over 600 us dollars a month to live on and had awful experience last month.

I had got the money order for my month of rent, got my 7 cartons of cigarettes for the month the cats food, her litter and some other household items and had after all those bills were paid 150 left for the rest of december and I had to pee really bad and so got all messed up and shoved the money into my wallet and went to some restroom in a store that was out of the thing i needed and got back to the car and then down the next store and realized my wallet was gone. I went back to the store i was at, some lady came out with my wallet and all id and welfare,medicare, food stamp card were there, but the 150 dollars for my months money was gone. So I went nuts and before i realized it had been in the parking lot and 2 hours passed while i spent the time tearing up my interior of my car to try and find it only hurt my hands and cried and went home and my mom is really not much help she just is evil and a hypocryte and was trying ot be all positive about all of it and it is all just too much to even try and go anywhere with any of it.

So, this is a new year I guess and so I am thinking the phone and internet may be getting shut off soon as i have not paid the bill for a couple of months i dont think. I am sorry this is so long and still trying to do all for myself except mom seems to think giving me a check for today like 35 dollars till i have to drive to the bank 60 mile away and maybe loose that money today and she liked this month and i think she smiles every time i am misfortuned and in pain and she laughs and laughs to herself when she stops over just long enough to not really visit, only to criticize and make sure to leave me here all devestated and alone and go home and go to bed feeling all happy cause she has made me upset and little money means more control for her. She controls, I cant break free and she loves it. Her husband is a real ass and i am at the point of not having "any established identity of self or self identity as a main alter or dominant host in the did" I am just what ever they say i am i guess. thats all i am aware of for now and maybe i am here more than i was to begin with and think it is nice that at least two people read my post and replyed and that is more than my own family does for me and I will go forth in victory as the joy of life and the hope of goodness and the good things i know i do and the good person i do try to be is going to do good for me and i will be better someday and when that day comes i can say to myself, it was worth it.; Peace to you all.

 

you have my sympathy