As if my first problem wasn't embarassing enough, http://www.hipforums.com/forums/showthread.php?p=3120110#post3120110, it looks like ive run into another problem with my female companion. After finally getting over my nerves it seems I cant get the damn thing in her. I'm starting to believe im the worst male in world when it comes to sex. I had a pretty good hardon while trying, she was pretty wet as well, but it seemed i couldnt fit in. My question is what do i do now? Giving oral, fingering her, ive noticed she has a rather small pussy could it be she's too small for me? My penis is pretty average in size as well. ANY help would be appreciated. Thanks, struggling amatuer
I had this problem with a girlfriend once, she was also very small. If she's a virgin that will also complicate the problem. I would get some kind of lubricant (water based not oil of course, oil might make the condom break.) also try using a finger to stretch her out before trying to have sex, try to get two fingers in if you can, but be sure to be gentle. When I had this problem I could get it in ok but a lot of the time it would still be painful for her. if your having this much trouble you may end up with this problem. if this is the case the two of you may want to have sex only once in a while to enjoy the closeness, that'll be up to her, but in general you may just have to find other ways to enjoy each other. Hope this helps.
That does help, I will try it out next time I'm with her. We've been pretty happy with oral, groping so far but really hoping to take it further. Thanks for the advice
NJones- If she is a virgin, she may have her hymen intact, which makes it hard to penetrate. Be gentle. If not, the problem may be that you are not hard enough to get it in, as you mentioned in your prior post. Otherwise, use a lubricated condom and possibly lubricate her vagina with your (clean) finger first, and a lubricant that does not react badly with a condom. Another thing you could do is make sure she is positioned well for your entry. Try the missionary position, with her on her back with a small pillow under her buttocks. That will elevate her into the best position for your entry. Let us know how it goes.
I think its a combination of all these things. She's really small and a virgin and sometimes i still have "performance anxiety." The last time this happened I had a pretty good hard on but it was very tight and i was afraid of hurting her as well. Once this happened i lost all confidence and i was back to square one. Any tips on not making it hurt so much for her? As i have a feeling it may a bit being the way she is. Thanks and ill let you know how it goes, hopefully this weekend
NJones - If she is a virgin, she may have an intact hymen, which is a covering of most or part of the vaginal opening. Sometimes it bleeds the first time a woman with an intact hymen has intercourse, and it can hurt. You might ask her if you can look and see if she still has her hymen, or ask her if she does (she may not know). I can understand how you can be sensitive about hurting her and that it can affect your performance. But try to relax, and get her to relax. Sex should be fun and her vaginia should conform itself to your penis size, unless you are abnormally big or thick. Lubrication, or lubricated condoms, can make it much easier to enter her, and you could "lube her up" with your clean fingers before you enter her.
It happened. I managed to relax and focus only on the moment and loosened her up first before trying to penetrate. Thanks for all the help. Now i only need to work on lasting more than 5 minutes
NJones - Congrats to both of you. Five minutes is not bad. You would be surprised how many guys can't make it two minutes. Here are some ways to last longer: 1. Think of yourself as drawing something out of her, rather than putting something in (old Kama Sutra trick). 2. Start counting each thrust, and you will think about the counting and not what is happening to your dick. 3. Sets of nine - do eight short thrusts (2-3 inches) then one deep one, then seven short thrusts, two deep, then six short and three deep, until you are doing nine deep ones. Thar she blows! 4. If you feel ready to cum, stop while inside her for 30 seconds or a minute, then start again. 5. If you feel like cumming, gently press down on your testicles from the top, which will retard orgasm. Just before orgasm, they nest up close to the shaft, rather than hanging loose. 6. Move from the missionary position to one where your upper body is above her with your arms outstretched (and a pillow under her butt), and rapidly make short movements in and out of her vagina (and you can watch yourself too). The first three inches of the vagina are the most sensitive, but the most sensitive for you is the full thrust, so you should be able to preserve yourself for a while. These really work - I am a lay sex therapist, and some of my clients with prelim ejac problems have said these techniques really helped them overcome it.
Try the fingers, that always helps. Lube, always a plus. If those don't work, maybe get her a small vibrator to break her in and let her play with herself. Let her figure out what makes penetration easy. Don't assume it's all your fault - being really tight can make things tricky.
