not sure where im going to go with this so bare with me... what would you do if you thought u knew your mum really well, and then all f a sudden u see something thatt changes everything?? my mum n dad split when i was 4. he had been in n outa jail for a while n was still in jail when they split. i was reading these letters that passed between him and my grandma, and some that he sent to my mum... the way they read, it basically stated that mum wasnt taking me n my little bro to visit him when he was in there and was always saying she would. i havent seen him since i was 4 nd im now 17 and i have no memories of him because mum never wants to speak about him, and never gave me the option of choosing if i wanted to know him... does this count as a sort of betrayal or... i dont know whether to feel hurt, or what... any thoughts?
Your mum was probably just trying to protect you. I understand that you feel hurt, anyone would in your situation. You should talk to your mum and see what she has to say. I'm sure she has a very good explanation for it.
perhaps... i asked her why she never told me about one of the reasons he went to jail and she said i didnt need to know... i wish she had let me make up my mind about it, and whether i wanted to see him or not
Enfys Moon: Well, I'd say your old enough to write him a letter. Maybe send him a school picture. If he's still doing time the return address on his letters would still be good , if he's out your grandma should have his address. If she wont help you run a who & where search or a MSN white pages search. I've had good luck with MSN searches, about 50%. I'm a father and if I was in that situation I would like to hear from my little girl, know that she well, happy and how she turned out. I think mum was trying to protect you and your brother. Going into a mens prison on visiting day isn't like a trip to the beach with picnic lunch. What ever you pursue, good luck......Dennis .....Alaskan
I can relate to this. When I was about 1 my parents split and my dad has also been in and out of jail for years. My mom would refuse to take his calls because she didn't know how to protect my brother and I. She also refused to let me see him all of last year for the choices he made. I think your mom did the same thing that mine did for the same reason as a few people stated...to protect you. She also probably didn't know how to explain to you at such a young age that your father was in jail. Perhaps she doesn't think you should be exposed to the reasons why he was in jail. Don't be mad at her. Don't feel hurt. If anything ask her why she really hid it and tell her that you're ready to hear everything that happened
