both physically and mentally. I don't know why. Well, the physical one I do....damn morning sickness.... I've been taking that diclectin to try and keep it clamed down a little bit. I didn't think that it was helping at all since I still felt uneasy, but after going without it for 14 hours today and trying to nap, I woke up in a cold shivering sweat with a rumbling tummy and a lump in my throat. I hate this... On top of that, I can't seem to get happy about this pregnancy. I don't know why. And it's making me soooooo depressed just to think about the fact that I'm depressed...if that made any sense. This time, all I can think about is how miserable I was during my post partum time with Leane. I think it may be a case of a fear of reapeating history again...but that post partum depression was hell on me and I am sooooooooooo scared about it again. Is there such thing as pregnancy depression? Cuz if so, I'm definately feeling it. Maybe it's just the nausea and the fatigue, but I'm just down. I can't figure it out. With Leane, I was sick as a dog for 3 months, but I was so excited. This time I keep asking myself how I'm going to get through this. What the heck is wrong with me........?
Heck YES you can get depressed during pregnancy!! Just think of how crazy your hormones are now! I think on top of feeling depressed, you may really be feeling anxious about getting depressed again, which obviously isn't helping. But in a way this is good news--you can tell your doc that you have a history with postpartum depression, and they may be able to plan ahead and get you set up with treatment as soon as the baby arrives (You might even be able to take anti-depressants during a pregnancy, but I don't know about that). I think they may have some that are safe for lactating women...well, anyway, drugs or not, at least this time you can plan for it and take the necessary steps so it won't be as difficult. Don't be so hard on yourself! You've only known you're pregnant for what, two weeks? It's much too early to declare that you "can't get excited about this one." Just give yourself some time! I know two weeks feels like forever, but never underestimate the power of human adaptation! **HUGS**
thankyou strawberry I know that there are some forms of anti-depressants out there that are safe to take, but I don't know which ones they are. I'm going to talk to the midwife about that. Anything that i can do to get rid of this depression I'm gunna want. This just feels so weird. When I was pregnant with Leane, from the moment I found out, I wanted to tell everyone. I would be walking down the street and have to tell the random people on the sidewalk about it. Now, I just don't feel as excited. In fact, it still hasn't sunk in. I have to actually remind myself. The other thing that keeps kinda making me worried is Leane. It feels like I just won't have the same relationship with her ever again. That, and I made it through that "baby-boot camp" stage and was so happy to be out of it. Now I'm going into it again. Before I got pregnant, there was nothing I wanted MORE than to go through the boot camp stage again. Now I'm just dreading getting up in the middle of the night. But you know what I think it is.....is becuse I feel so sick right now, and the thought of functioning with a newborn and feeling like this makes me want to curl up in a ball and disapear and make everything go away. I'm not happy when I'm sick as you can see.....
you're not the only one thats going through that. i had the opposite though, no morning sickness and i couldn't get really excited bc of the pregnancy because i wasn't feeling anything from it. i'm 14 weeks on my second child, and i feel bad that i'd forget i'm pregnant if it wasnt for dr appointments. its hard you're probably wondering how you're going to keep up with your daughter now when you feel shitty. And then wondering how you'll keep up with her when the baby is born. Thats my main concern with the new one, my son never sits still so i have no clue how it'll be with another baby. Best wishes, you probably wont run into a bunch of new experiences with this pregnancy, which gets rid of some of the excitement. I just try to focus on the joy of picking out the new names, and comparing both pregancies. Maybe if you made a small blanket or something for the new baby it might get you a little more excited.
Definitely talk about a plan of treatment for the post partum period NOW while you're still pregnant. I had horrible, horrible PPD (actually had serious thoughts of harming myself) with my oldest son, and wanted to make sure I never, ever went through that again because it was pure hell, and I wanted to be able to enjoy my babies! I discussed my options with my OB/GYN many months before my twins were born. For me, I had to be put on an anti-depressant immediately following the birth, they gave it to me while I was still in the ICU because they wanted to nip the problem in the bud before it even began, that I was also suffering PTSD due to the severe complications I had. And it definitely worked for me.
thanks hippychickmommy I think I figured out why I was feeling so lousy....that damn diclectin I was taking for the morning sickness!!!! It was making me more sick than I already was, and on top of that, so tired I couldn't function. I don't know if it was because I felt more sick and tired, but I also noticed when I took them I felt incredibly depressed. So, I stopped, and now I feel a TON better!
ReMemBer: The only constant is change. I Really hope things are going a LOT better for you. much sympathy: amandabugger
