looking for a prince (sorry, kinda long)

i'm a really shy person, and have never guys as anything more than friends. sadly, i also have a vivid imagination and a pretty romantic nature, so i feel like i have this image in my head that no man can ever measure up to. i start feeling like i'm projecting what i want onto every guy so he'll be perfect, and i'm so blinded by my illusion that i can't see their faults or who they really are. and it's inevitable that they'll fall short of my unreasonable expectations.

when i have a crush on someone, i really fall hard. in 2 days, i'm daydreaming about running away with them. my friend tells me this is normal, but i always feel a little creepy for being this obsessive.
recently, i met a guy that i really liked, thought was cute, and felt like i had a connection with. the more i thought about him, the deeper i felt, and the more i worried that he didn't feel the same. i don't have the highest self-esteem, so i usually have a hard time understanding why anyone would like me anyway. i hardly know him, but i felt like i just wanted to believe so much that he was perfect. i felt like i was getting in way too deep, so i haven't talked to him in awhile.
i just want to know what he really thinks of me... and if i should start back slowly, or wait for him to make the first move. i just have this feeling it'll be like every other time i lose something i really wanted, but never even had in the first place.
thanks for listening.

 

So do it the oppisite way you normally do and it should work out. It is normal to have fantasies about people you find interesting and attractive. No big thing, if you keep in mind it is a fantasy. I think too many people don't find the "perfect" one right off so they settle for less then they were looking for. This is a mistake. If your head tells you they are not the one and not perfect for you then believe yourself. Don't be in such a rush to find your one and only, they will come to you when the time is right. If you were much older then I would think you might have high expectations but at your age you meet many more men along the way.

 

iw as having similar problems too.... id get a crush on someone and start fantasizing (usually about kissing o sex but anyway), and they would neve be able to live up to this perfection id created in my head. so i simply dont let msyelf fantasize abou tthat anymroe because its not fair to put them up onto that pedestal, they will -always- fall and its not fair to create these expecations of them that they dont know about

 

thanks guys, i really appreciate you responding. i think you're both right, and we'll have to see how things go.
~ peace ~

 

It shouldnt matter if a person is "perfect". It's not like you are shopping for something.

If you like them, that's enough to get to know them better.

 

that's true as well. i just have to see what's out there and not get stuck on how i think everything has to be.

personally, i blame disney. :H

 

oh girl ya need to be more self-confident!!!
why not thinking ya are the best one in the world?
if ya love yourself people will love ya madly

and as for a prince....
ok be confident and ya'll find him
being romantic is nothing bad if ya are not over-naive
i'm romantic too...i'm used to falling in love with every beautiful stranger

ya should talk to that guy and try to get to know him the way he is not the way ya picture him in your mind

good luck
believe in yaself

 

I don't know, try inviting him to do something "friendly." I mean, you don't have to ask him on a date or anything. If there's any chance that something could work out between you two, he's not going to turn down just hanging out or doing something fun. Plus, it'll give you a chance to get to know him better and see if he really is your prince. If he rejects that proposition, then it's just not meant to be, and you try to move on.