im 19 and scared to death of sex

so i have a boyfriend, and we almost broke up partly because i wasnt ready for sex (we straightened everything out now, its all good). fact is, it scares me. and not just the reprocussions, but the act itself. ive mastrobated and it did absolutely nothing. when we get a little, "serious", i feel nothing. and its not that i dont find him attractive at all. he's gorgeous, in my book. i just dont think i have a sex drive. im still a virgin, and have no intent on changing that. i think i could die a virgin and be happy. what is wrong with me?

 

You might have just not hit your sex-drive yet.

Anyhow, sex is silly and overrated, don't let any guy pressure you into it. A guy who wants to break up with you because you don't want to have sex with him should be dumped on the spot.

Nothing is wrong with wanting to stay a virgin, not in me book.

 

I wouldn't worry too much about your whole future here. First of all, nothing wrong with not being that into sex. I've had it. It's great. THAT great that I can't live without it? Thus far, nope.

However, it _should_ be something that's enjoyable, and so if everything leading up to it hasn't been, I suspect the sex wouldn't be either. In which case, it's worth it to just wait and give it some time.
And you're right, there are major repurcussions and risks to sex--diseases, pregnancy, etc., so it's worth it to do it only when it feels worth it.

 

Lucy - you are just beginning your exploration of the world of sex, and you may not be doing it right. Check out some internet sites on clitoral stimulation and g spot stimulation, and show them to your boyfriend. It often takes a female 15-20 minutes to get an orgasm manually and longer for some (perhaps 25% of you never have an orgasm, or don't even try).

PM me if you want more personal instruction, especially re g spot stimulation. I am the master, so my girlfriends have told me.

 

cuted shes scared to death of sex & you want her to pm you & practice g spot stimulation with a guy on the net named after his dick?
not cool


ok lucy ty
there maybe a few things going on here, a desensitization can be aused by many things
culd be fear.. which iunderstandble
could be his approach
could be yr a-sexual..meanng very deeply lovinbut not interested in sex at all..
but 19 & scared isnt iunusual
if u want to talk more we can
but not for instruction just maybesee if we cant figure it out i think its more emotional & trust then sensation right>/

 

Nothings wrong. Not everyone likes sex. You are in a tiny minority though.

 

thanks guys. (cutter, dont expect a pm, but i appreciate the offer) i feel a little better. he's really not as bad as i probably made him sound. he said he'd rather stay with me and never touch me than never see me again. he's a sweety heh, maybe soringeagle is right, maybe i am a-sexual :S

 

do you at least please him i mean... come on now.. jk..

 

Buy yourself a nice little pocket-rocket clit vibe and learn to make love to yourself first. Then find what exactly it is that seems to be the source of your fear. Don't expect it to be rational.

You could just be asexual like SE mentioned, however it couldn't hurt if you got your hormone levels checked out during your yearly physical.

 

Lucy - just loosen up a bit and it will be OK. Sex is not a trial but a great thing for humans to do to get close to each other. Don't give up.

 

Yes, as you relax with it you'll begin to enjoy it. You'll feel it when you're starting to get off on the experience. It's all natural.