Okay, so I've only been a vegetarian since November so It hasn't been that long. I told my mom before I wasnt eating neither fish or meat...but she was always mad at me saying fish cant feel anything and that its not considered meat..which i disagreed with her because Ive read about studies on how fish can feel like any animal. But she pursuaded me to eat tuna one time, and it like grossed me out and I didnt eat it again. But that not even being bad enough about a month later she got really mad at me for not eating perch so I did and i felt so bad after cause I really dont want to eat it. I know most people must think I really dont want to be a vegetarian if I am that easily pursuaded but I seriously dont want to eat fish, and I think my mom is immature if she cant support me in my decisions and gets mad over something like that. In the beginning she told me I could be a vegetarian and she'd support me, and now it seems like shes always holding it against me. The other day I had a friend over and we were looking for something to eat and she was like WELL if you ate meat it would be easier, what if abbie whats something you dont like? and she was like so mad. er, i guess I just dont understand her. Anyway, I was just wondering if it would make sense to sort of "start over" and not eat fish like anymore..if you know what im saying ??? I hope people dont think im like stupid :[
No, I don't think you're stupid, and I realize that at 15 you don't have complete control of your life. Just some suggestions: Tell your Mom (when you know she's in a good mood and not distracted by other things) that you'd really like to try being a vegetarian, and you'd very much like her moral support. Don't expect her to cook special things just for you, and tell her that you don't. Don't be surprised if it takes her some time to "get it". I think it's easier for omnis to assimilate if you tell them what you DO eat, instead of what you DON'T. "Mom, I eat vegetables and grains mostly, but there are lots of different vegetables and grains" and then give her examples. If you're allowed, cook for yourself, at least some of your food. If you have any spending money, spend at least part of it on foods you'll eat. Don't be picky about what you'll eat as long as it's vegetarian. Expect to eat a lot of boring food at first, especially if your Mom does all the cooking. "Boring" food isn't all that bad anyway after your tastes adjust a bit. I found I like plain boiled potatoes with just a sprinkle of sea salt - I'd always eaten them fried, or in casseroles, or mashed with lots of butter. I didn't really know what a potato tastes like, and I found out they're pretty good without all the disguises. Redefine your ideas about what constitutes a snack. It doesn't have to come in a cellophane bag, or be deep-fried and crispy, or covered with chocolate, or "new super nacho flavored" - but it also doesn't have to be a raw carrot or a cold-storage tomato. As for the fish ... saying "thanks for the tuna, but I didn't care for it" may be easier for your Mom to accept than saying "I won't eat that".
As a mom of teenagers, let me just add that she might see you being veg as a rejection of her cooking, or of her food choices, or whatever. Try not to come across as judgemental of her food choices, but like Gaston said, try to calmly and kindly explain that this is something you want to try for yourself. Maybe you could offer to cook one night per week and make a veg meal--she might learn to love some of the foods you cook! Also, if you see her making an effort to accommodate you, praise it, even if she messes up (like thinking vegetarians eat fish). "Mom, thanks so much for trying to accommodate my diet, but I'd prefer to avoid fish as well." And maybe you could make some specific requests like, "Mom, when you go to the store, could you pick up some extra bananas and potatoes for me?" Good luck--I know it must be hard to try to eat differently than your family while you are still living at home!
wow, your mom cooks for you daily at 15? I think I'd taken over the kitchen on weekdays by then. (granted I and my parents all worked) I swap out with my son, who enjoys cooking, and sees himself as the omni saviour 'round here (I live with two omnis) Tell your mom when she cooks that you want double helpings of the veggies and skip what to her is the entree. open a can of beans and have that if she is really worried about protien (and don't bother if she's jsut resentful). But do sit down with her and armed with a few sample menus, suggest ways that this can work. heck, have her come ask us questions. My kid is 15, too.
I understand feeling persuaded to eat things you don't wanna eat. Everyone has those fall backs.. I bet every vegetarian slipped up at least once, I know I have definitely more than once. But you learn from that, you learn what you want to eat and what you don't want to eat. And if you want to eat something thats fine too. People will always say it'd be easier to eat with you if you were a vegetarian but oh well. They should respect you. It can be hard trying to fit in with that kidna stuff but its okay. Good luck. =)
Your mom may not view her non-agreement as disrespectful of your lifestyle. my mom was at first really not supportive (I went veg at roughly the same age as you are going veg). *She may be worried about your health*. We have been taught from an early age that animal products= good for us, or that only meat= protein or only milk=calcium. She may think her baby (and that is what you always will be to her) won't be healthy and strong. You can't blame her for that. You can only blame her for being disrespectful to you or hurting your feelings. Arm yourself with information and share it with her. First, let her know that fish has absolutely no part in vegetarianism. Going back and forth may make her feel that you are wishy-washy and that you don't really mean what you say. Show her you are eating a well-balanced diet and that she need not worry about proper nutrients. (Do not be a coke and fries vegetarian.) Start cooking on your own and once you get good enough, even offer to cook for your family. When she sees that it's normal and enjoyable she'll lay off. For the record, my mom is very supportive of me and has drastically cut her own meat-eating down. Show her the links in the FAQ's, etc. http://www.vrg.org/nutrition/index.htm that's a good start Try vegweb.com and vegcooking.comfor recipe try cok.net and goveg.com for info also. Good luck and keep at it!
actually, if the fam is having cola or fries, enjoy them. there IS a social and sharing aspect to food. Breaking bread and all that. but don't live off them. would it help if you did cook one night a week? maybe something as simple as veg chili and corn bread? (with some green veggie on the side and fruit-based dessert) or having a couple boxes of prefab veggie burgers in the freezer (they take minutes to heat through) so you can be part of the rest of the family's food. the baked potato, salad, green beans (w/o bacon) etc are all fair game. (I know of people who have luck with freezing homemade bean burgers, but mine always become sloppy joes- good, but not quite what I was after: the red onion, thick sliced pickle and Heinz 57 with dark green lettuce) Pam's right that we are taught in school (and I'm guessing your mom is close to my age) with Dairy Council, Cattlemen's Beef and egg board materials in what passes for nutrition. That's strong indoctrination to overcome, or worse for a mom, see one child intentionally turn on its head. My mom STILL worries, 26, almost 27 years later. but she's starting to ask about tasty soy milk (I couldn't help her. I never liked milk and only cook with it. I put juice on granola- I referred her to almond or rice milk) and ways to increase her own veggie intake.
Yea, I'd like to cook I just dont really know of much to cook haha. When I get some extra money I was thinking of buying a vegetarian cookbook from Borders..And I talked to my about about the whole fish thing and all she really said was "your missing out" so I guess to take that as its okay? So thanks everyone for the suggestions, very helpful :]
Sunshine, A question for you--do you seriously have dreads?? I'm just thinking that if your mom can tolerate those, she'll learn to live with your vegetarian lifestyle! (I don't mean that to sound like I'm opposed to dreads--I actually have dread envy! But most people don't go for them, ya know?)
I would definitely recommend getting a vegetarian cookbook and experimenting with cooking. That's how I learned, and actually going veg made me into a damn good cook, when I had previously never been into it. It might also help to go grocery shopping with your mom and also do your homework about vegetarian nutrition and share what you learn with her, so she will have no reason to be worried about your health. Most studies show that a vegetarian diet is very healthy and can reduce your risk of heart disease and some kinds of cancer. You made the right choice, now you just gotta convince your mom of it, too. Good luck.
LIBRARY: noun: place where you can borrow books for free, or in some situations, a minimal membership fee.
Pm a mailing address to me and Iwill send you a copy of "The Vegetarian Life." The subtitle is How to Be a Veggie in a Meat-eating World. It's about ten years old, but it has a lot of good info and some recipes. The info might help your mom feel more comfortable about your choices. And it will help you plan nutritious eating. Do NOT post your address to the forum. And if you have a post office box or something that is better, because you don't know who I am at all. I want you to be safe, but I'd like to get this out to you to get you started. Kathi
Sounds like a good book. I think I'll check it out, too. Thanks. I'm thinking about becomming vegetarian, but haven't actually done it yet. Mostly due to a lack of easey ways to prepare vegetarian snacks and quick meals.
