Theres only one person who would try a Nasty Ryan

and thats me.

Nasty Ryan



A Nasty Ryan is the act of making doo doo, and letting hang half way out of the anus, then dragging it across a partner's body much like a crayon.

"I can't believe she gave me a Nasty Ryan last night."

 

fuck

 

That is better than donkey punch, snail trail and dirty sanchez put together.

 

Oh god, but i do love the occasional dutch oven.

 

dutch oven



The act of throwing out a vicious, obnoxious fart in bed and then holding the head of a loved one underneath the sheets, either until they pass out or better still vomit.

I knew that I had left a skiddie in my pants as I curved out a stinkfart. I then asked my wife to check under the covers to see whether there was a spider. She was immediately overcome by the repugnant gas that was down there and try as she might, she couldn't fight as my hands held her head in place. When she came up eventually, she remarked that she felt nauseous and that I had indeed shit my pants in the process. Nice!

 

snail trail



A strange phenomenon which occurs when you are watching porn with your girl on a leather couch. As she begins to get wet with excitement (at this point she is probally naked or bottomless) she will leave a sticky streak of lube from her vagina as she moves across the couch, resembling a trail of slime left by snails and slugs

Deb got so turned on by the lesbo video she left a snail trail across my new couch.








Donkey Punch



The Donkey Punch is when your engaged in anal sex and when your about to ejaculate you punch the poor little lady in the back of the head so her anal cavity tightens making the orgasm all that more better (for you ofcourse).

I donkey punched Meredith last night, and It was awesome

 

You are so lovely.

 

For you I'd save the best, a flaming Doogan.

Flaming Doogan



Take a girl out for some spicy food (preferabily hot chicken wings or mexican food) and drink lots of beer and a good amount of tequila. Next, make sure you spend the night at her house. Then have intercourse with her and when you wake up in the morning and have to take a shit from all the alcohol and spicy food you take a shit in a paper bag and leave it on the pillow by her face.

I left a flaming doogan on that bitches pillow.

 

and these are supposed to be sexual how?

gross.

 

That is fucking priceless :cheers:

 

I'm afraid you're taking this far too seriously, son.

 

cuz it turns me on when I do them