A guy telling me that I'm fine....

....

 

You sound a little bitter, maybe you should relax a little more, chill out.

 

my husband was still living with his folks when we got together... of course we were both still in school but he was old enough to be on his own. now he has a very reliable job , going to college and starting a buisiness of his own on the side. i think you are cutting your options really thin if you think getting with a guy still with his parents means he's gonna turn out to be a bum. anyway... sometimes girls do pick bums who mooch off of them but its the other way around too..... you are right a woman should be able to choose whether or not she wants to be a career woman or a housewife.. but i feel that it should be her and her husbands choice together whether or not she mooches off the man. not that being a housewife is mooching.... thing is there is a difference between a housewife and a woman who sits on her ass all day watching soap operas. while the man is working hard. there is nothing wrong with a woman making the money while the man does the housework and watches the kids or vice versa.. its all about personal choice and coming to a mutually accepted agreement on who plays what roles if any roles at all. i do not agree with you that the man HAS to be the money maker whether a woman works or not... just like women have rights so do men and its all about finding whats right for you.... and then whats right for the both of you as a couple . all relationships are a compromise. at the moment i am currently a housewife but i very much enjoy working and when we move i will be finding a new job. right now i am doing the majority of the housework but when i had a job my husband and i split the chores... even now he helps out sometimes. i see nothing wrong with that. he has also expressed to me that if i should choose to work after i have kids, he would love to be the one taking care of the home and kids for awhile. of course he doesnt want me to do that if i dont want to. i honestly think that wont happen for the simple fact that he is much better at making money than i am and im better at holding small jobs and doing household things but still.. its all about choice and compormise.

 

i think its flattering when someone lets me know they think i look good as long as i know they respect me for who i am too... it is a slimy feeling when you hear that from someone you know doesnt give a rats ass about who you are inside.

 

I will disagree, not that I love getting comments or compliments on my appearance but it doesn't matter to me if a stranger who doesn't care about anything but my appearance compliments me, it is okay for people to find other people attractive and every person that you find attractive isn't someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with. I think it is strange sometimes that they feel it necessary to get so excited and tell you, but who cares, I've done it before... whatever.

 

and you people think I hate men?



*walks away laughing*

 

i love taking care of pple.. i dont really care if it sounds like im not independent or that im too submissive or w/e... if my lovah is hungry or uncomfortable at my place i just hate it...

so far no one complained and im happy about it... i just think its normal to take care of the pple u love, u dont have to go all "feminist" about it

 

as for men commenting that you're attractive to them, well, we just have to face the fact that that's how every single relationship begins: with sexual attraction. sexual compatibility is extremely important in any relationship. i'm not gonna get pissed at my man because he was attracted to my face and body before he was attracted to my mind. he had to get to know me to like my mind, but he wouldn't even have tried if he didn't find me attractive first.

 

exactly...

 

Never judge someone because they live at home. i dated a guy who lived at home and later found out he owned several rental properties and just really liked living with his mom and younger siblings. I wouldn't have cared if he lived there out of neccesity though.

 

when i first got together with dave, he was living with his mother. that was a shock, but i found out that she had moved into his house after getting a divorce and needed a place to go. she THEN bought his house from the man that he was renting it from, moved her boyfriend in, and asked dave when he was moving out. so funny.


my friend jim also lived with his mother. but she was older and required care. then she developed colon cancer and he cared for her at home. she finally passed away and now he's alone. he's one truly fantastic man, and he lived with his mother.

 

Amen

I had low self-esteem and let myself fall prey to a scrub before. I had the kind of mindset where I didn't feel that I deserved any better. In the beginning we were in love, but over time, true colors began to show. Your right, I let myself be treated that way because I use to think that it was better than nothing. Even in the end neither of us could let go. It took God's upper hand to bring us apart. Men with that type of mentality never ship up. Over the course of a year that we have been apart, he is still getting himself fired from his jobs, driving his mama's car, and spending all his free time in a drug induced state. I miss the good times we had together, but I count my blessings that the Lord said this marriage wasn't going to happen.