Loud chip crunching.

Today I went to school after smokin 3 bowls before I left so I was pretty blazed. I was sitting in math 1st period and I had the munchies so bad. Then i remembered that I had some Doritos in my backpack. So I got them out and opened up the bag. We were supposed to be doing work and the classroom was basically silent so whatever you did seemed real loud. So as I ate every chip the crunch was so loud. Like id try and do different things to keep my crunching quiet but nothing worked. Sure enough after my 3rd or 4th Dorito i had the chick in front of me turning around wondering about the crunching and I never knew crunching could be so loud even when its in your mouth and all. Anyone know a way to eat chips silently besides for like blending them into a milkshake. Or maybe I just need to bring a quieter food to class.

 

Lol I know what you mean. Go with cookies or something softer and less crunchy.

 

Crush them up before you open the bag, then pour em into your mouth when there in bits. Thats all i can think of.

 

It's not the chips being loud that's the problem, it's the sound in general. You need an extremely high powered vacuum to remove nearly all of the air inside the classroom. Once you have done so, there will be no medium for the mechanical sound waves and your crunching will become silent.

 

That is a stupendous idea, but you have just one flaw in your operation. I and the rest of my class would be dead before I even had a chance to open the doritos. So it would kind of defeat the purpouse. Unless we had....... scuba tanks. Now were getting somewheres.

and of all colors of lighters? why white paintballer?

 

Oh... you wanted to stay alive? Well now, you didn't exactly tell me that little bit of information.

To be a rebel? Heh, I'm not really supersticious but I didn't have a lighter at that time so I stopped off at a liquor store and that was the only color they had. Plus it keeps the color scheme to primarily red and white.

 

Best food in class when your baked has got to be cookies.

 

<3 cookies.

though one time we had to go to small claims court for our Law class (on our own time, needless to say me and three buddies went stoned).
i had some starbursts, and it opening each individual rapper made SUCH a noise over the guy who was saying something about "small claims" or whatever,

 

piss in the bag so then all the chips get moist and that will relieve the crunchinesses

 

yea switch to a sandwitch (like a tuna, not a meatball hogie or something)

 

Crunch them up or stop smoking weed, your only two options.

 

Doritos are amazing when your high and can really enjoy them. For in class munchies I always liked pastries. Cinn Brown Sugar poptarts are always good.

Does anyone like any other flavor pop tart? I can't eat any of the 'berry' flavored tarts.

 

The Hot Fudge Sundae Pop Tarts in a toaster is the shit.

 

Who gives a fuck if they're loud? If your classmates wanted some they shoulda got their own bag and anyone who is distracted by the sound of someone else chewing delicious Doritos diserves to be bugged.

Oh, and s'mores pop tarts are pretty damn good munchies.

 

oh yeah i forgot about them s'more pop tarts, but I'm sticking to the, 'I don't like the berry flavors' protest.

 

when im in class i munch on a huge rice crispy treat.

 

Did you catch the latest episode of South Park? Reminds me when they're stranded on the roof of a building and Stan's dad goes, "we're out of Pop-Tarts, we're gonna starve!" and then someone goes, "look, there's a box right here!" and Stan's dad replies, "but those are cherry! Ehh."

In retrospect, typing that out didn't really have the comical effect I intended... It was funny on the show, though.

 

^hahah

here's a tip: eat a banana in class. then you can have fun with the peel afterwards.

or, roll the banana around in the chip bag until you have a banana with doritos stuck to it and eat that. damn that kinda sounds like a good idea.

i haven't had doritos in such a long time... im more likely to pull out an avocado in class and eat that haha what a loser i am

 

That reminds me, last Sunday I slipped on a banana peel. I've never seen or heard of anyone actually slipping on one before.

 

Oh, and that banana chip thing reminds me of that cartoon, Doug, where they were eating bananas dipped in pizza sauce and it looked delicious on the t.v. but then I tried it and was sorely mistaken...