I've had a tumultous few weeks and can't seem to think straight myself so I thought other people's perspectives could be very helpfull to me right now. Two and a half weeks ago my boyfriend left without telling me anything,he left a note with his mom (she was out of town at the time) saying he loved me and would miss me dearly,also saying he had to go and sort some things out ,that he had to do this and it was very important. I didn't know what to think,I didn't think he'd ever come back,but he did a week later.Needless to say everyone in my life is now extremely upset with him and what he did,as am I. I saw him Saturday and we talked about things but right now I don't know what to do. I do love him, and he knows if I do trust him ever again it's going to take a very long time to do it and it's going to be very difficult but has anyone ever been in a similar situation? Can trust really be rebuilt or once it's gone is it gone forever? I'm so confused and find just wish things could go back to right before he left though they can't so I guess I just have to decide already.
I think that trust can be rebuilt but it takes a lot of time and he has to earn it. It is so hard to trust someone who broke your trust. Did he give you a reason for not telling you, or even try to explain?
im in that situation on the other end...im trying to regain this one girl's trust and i think she either might have a boyfriend, or she just doesnt know what to do about us, but its like, when we are around eachother, you can see that we would be a great couple and when i leave her to go home, the following minutes are texts and crap, and then the following weeks are like im locked in a spell....its weird, but anyways as far as the trust issue...i am really really hoping and doing everything i can to show this girl i want to be commited to her, i just dont know whats going on through her end. any thoughts?
Sorry you're going through this. I know what its like cuz I'm there right now also. I've been trying to trust him again, and it is getting better. Just have some faith and make sure you guys are talking things out. That was our major problem no communication. I'm not going to lie. It is hard to trust him when he goes out with his friends sometimes, but you just have to work through it. It's been a few months, but is gradually getting better.
When it comes to broken trust there really needs to be a lot of assurance and apology on his behlaf. He needs to make you feel that he is genuinely sorry, and that he has listened to why you are upset about what he did and then finally reassure you that it will never happen again. and you need to decide if its something you can forgive.
i'm not quite sure i understand he just took a week off from the relationship? did he say in the note why he was leaving i know he said he had to sort some stuff out, i guess for me it just kind of depends what his reasoning is for leaving? i have been with my bf for along time and trust me i would love it sometimes if he took a week off or a fishing trip or something. was he with someone else? or what did you gather from his body language when u did finally see him?
l had this kind of situation with my best friend few yrs ago. we were really close, l really loved him as a friend. and then he fell in love, stayed with the girl for a few yrs, which was fine by me... wasn't jelaous. the only thing was we didn't hang out as we used to, but l accepted it, just like his girlfriend. until one night l get totally drunk, went to his place and we had a fight for some stupid reason, till this very day don't know which one, but l do remember l got so pissed and told him something mean about his girlfriend. and that was it! over! finito! l knew then that l'm the only one to blame, l apologised million times, but it didn't work. months passed by and the more l thought about it, the more l asked myself did l have some romantic feelings about him. l still think l didn't, years are passing by, l got over him and our friendship. but he still stays the most beautiful memory.......
