do you mind if i rap a bit? and no its not a song

If you clicked on the thread I can only that you’re down for me to get a lil bit off and out of my mind. I come here a lot, don’t say much, as my name implies I am rather quiet. And you know, I read up, not snoop or trying to invade people’s personal feelings, just seeing what it would be like to be a-part of a world, (though second thought makes me feel community would be a better statement) that consist of such a great range of folks, you know? I live a good life, I stay as positive and as enlightened as possible, as much as possible. But I get phased by mishaps, situations, and other forms of negative news that are brought to my attention, and I feel, well I guess weak in my two shoes. I mean, honestly theres not much that I do to assist and aid or help the situation or whatever it may be. And I want to. In a large, thats one of the bigger reasons as I come here, because people bring things to my attention that no one else around me would. Not being able to see this kind of... support? Activity? Involvment in whats oretty much considered bohemian things ya know what I mean? I in my spare time, like to read up on these intrest, but never live it. Im a kid in the desert thats wishes it were a forest, around surounded by a decent group of freinds, however me in some of my deeper insecurities my be fret to call mst of them friends. And I guess I’ve gone off track a bit, to sum it up, its nice to come here and hear of a world thats got heart, just theres a big chunk of me that wishes I lived it... everyday. When I say live it, I mean.. To me living with a peace you earn with nature. Setting yourself up with harmony to hold your back. I feel like, well, im wasting my life not going after what I wish. But I am a conditioned mind, I’ve been warned, and time again that schools important. And it is. But once I get there I start hearin that I need to amke the money now, well I wnated to go to school to learn science and work on my poetry, not take businesses classes. And now I am taking two business classes which im doing well in but its not something that I am attached nor partialy intrested in. I thought of becoming a nurse, but I want to know in and outside of what natures all about. I want to teach but learn the constellations. BUT, again, I am forewarned the need for money, and I don’t see it... A part of the beef im sharing might lie in the fact that I do have two good friends, the closest I have ever felt to anyone that I didn’t fear abandoning me, you dig? I am telling ymself I am a fool though, because, well I don’t know why. Talking to you, well while typing and thinking to myself, while tlaking to you I am starting to feel like im scared. It makes sense, I know I am in certain portions of my life. I have basic needs that havent been meant. Now I’m going back toward Ab Maslow, and his hierarchy of needs, he was a psychologist. He theorized that an individual must fulfill each need in order to have self actualization. That ranges from the msot basic physical to the least basic, self actualization. In between are security, social, and self esteem. I’m lacking in the social and security parts. I’ve done a good job of bringin myself to where I sit, or stand. I listened, took time to learn from other’s mistakes. But here I am trying to learn from my own, and know what I’m doing wrong. Because I want to live my life, according to how I feel. It pretty much leaves em feeling regret, wishing that I had someone that introduced me first hand into such ways.but and, And, haha, it seems some of you, a great deal, live that rich lifestyle of obtaining and experiencing and accomplishing wonder and beauty. I wish to do so much, for myself and others, because I want to at least give my full out honest effort in makign this world a bit more hopeful ya know? You guys, you all do that. I mean children of the earth, brothers and sisters under the sun.. you know what I mean. I consider myself, as I do you. We’re the kind of folks that are trying to what’s best.. Just yall are doing it better than me.. Its something im working on though. I just figured, well maybe someone will read this, and listen, and maybe give em their insight. You’ve had enough of mine I imagine, I could go on and on though. I’ll let it quiet down though.. Thanks again, peace and love everyone

 

I'm learning a bit about the Law of Attraction and Quantum Physics and I'm thinking that you can do what you want to do, life doesn't have to be hard,(meaning following someone elses idea of what they think we should be, or do.) we should be able to feel like we are drifting along in the current if we can visualize what we want *anything*and believe that we can have it. i know you are not a materialistic person hon, but it can be anything, experiences, a meal when you need one, a conversation, whatever! Colt, you must believe you deserve what you want and that you can have it. (there may be some work involved, but it will end up being something you enjoy, it shouldn't be unpleasant) At the same time you want to avoid thinking about bad things because that is what you are telling the universe you want, you need to focus on the things which make you happy and believe more good stuff is coming to you, and it will. I sound so naive I think, I am just learning about this sruff....but it's worked for me a lot thru my life now that I look back on it. I hope this was somewhat helpful, always here for you Colt. K

 

I know how you feel, I feel like that sometimes too. I always try and look at my life from and outside persepctive when I get to that point. You are fortunate enought to have the urge to learn, discover, and expereience new things. You are young, really young, and I can say that you know alot more than I did when I was 16. You have so much time to learn more, and expereicnce more...and for me I would have never become the person I was if I had not been stuck in place that at hated when I was 16.

You are fortunate enough to have the thrist now, take advantage of not having any responisbilites that hold you from expereincing it as much as possible. You'll learn more for it in the long run, in my humble opinion anyways.

Willing you fulfilment.