What do you think? Please read and tell me.

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She keeps her emotions locked inside
No one would understand
The pain she's felt
The sorrow she feels
Or the anger she has
No one is there to hold her hand
And help her through her sorrow
No one understands
She's cut before
But she said she wouldn't do it anymore
She can't help it
So she makes another slit

~She is me~

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She Swears

A dull blade, so much blood
So much to lose
Nothing to hold
No where to got, nothing to do
She cries on this inside
But she tried not to show it
She tries to act okay
But she loses her way
She's been hurt with the blade
And she swears she'll never love again

~She is me~

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Just because she comes off strong
doesn't mean she didn't fall asleep crying.
Even though she acts like noghting is wrong,
maybe, just maybe she'll really good at lying.

~She is me~

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~She is me~ is something I put at the end of all my poem that sound like they are talking of some other girl to let people know that these poems are actually about me. It's kinda of my signature thing. Everyone at school knows my poems when they are in the school newspaper because that's what I put at the end. That way I don't have to sign my name.

 

its a bit like - hmmmm K ... erm... ha . er yeah right like you really do that shit !

 

Well maybe thats because I do? Did ya ever think of that?

 

yes !

 

oh...well then...fine...you be smart then! but seriously...were they any good?

 

I think they are good if you want to let people know how you feel dark and pained and troubled but theyre not exactly the sort of think the majority of people would want to read. A work of art is always good for something -
a work of art is never good just because someone thought it - yes they are good for letting us know how you feel but people have hectic lives of tradgedy and pain and happiness too and though they are good I do not think they are what huge numbers of people would think of as intellectual stimulants - merely emotional sentiments

 

I like the dark mood the poet created here, but I can see how the overall negative emotion might put a few people off.

I would like to see the poet's voice show a little more control in the future, rather than give the impression of a victim, or powerless bystander.

Even if the poet fails, she must try and stand against the tide, to attract the reader to stand with her when they read her poems.

There is great potential in these verse, because the poet relates directlty to her feelings.

The only thing left now is beyond the written words.

It's small choices that make us great people.(© White Scorpion)

The poet has to realize that she has the power to become the epic hero, and every little aspect of her life is within her grasp to shape and give ethos to not just her destiny, but also the stanzas she creates to describe it.

 

I'm sure that with your words many of your peers who lack the courage/will to express themselves have found a voice in you.....a quite literate and brave voice.....continue honing the knife not of a razors edge but of a written/spoken word........many cut many most cut skin and bleed blood....others pierce the soul and bleed words thrrough there their pen that fill the page and fill the silenced spirits with understanding......

~respect~

 

Yeah, good start. Keep it coming. I would like to see more. Very sad, but....

 

the first too r good...my short attention span wouldnt let me read the rest lol the 1st one reminds me of something i wrote it sounds a lot like me

 

I Think You're Very, Very Talented, YouRemindMeOfYou...I Also Think You Should Talk To An Adult In Your Lyfe That You Love And Trust If These Are 'Real To Lyfe' And Not Just An Artistic Expression...Keep The Poetry Coming, Sweetie : )

 

There are "Real To Lyfe"

But I've been on the 5th floor of our local hosptital 5 times for cutting before so finally my family just gave up on me to stop. My friends and my new boyfriend really want me to stop though. Hopefully, I just grow out of it.

Thanks for the thoughts people! I will try and keep some of these things in mind...I'll post more this afternoon.