man's opinion

ok guys,,,i need some help. I am leaving my husband. we have been together 17 years and not had sex for the last 5 or 6.

I have never dated...always met another man and left my partner.

This time I plan to do things right. I am not leaving for another man and I am going to do my best to find the right man for me.

The problem? I don't find myself attracted to very many men and when I do, I go bananas. I think i obsess and find I can't live without them. I then immediately profess my attraction and I believe this scares them.

I am VERY passionate and intense. I'm older, but not too old and most men seem attracted to me.

How do I "pace" myself and find the right one? How do I tell who the players are? How do I find a fantastic sexual partner and not get a disease?

Would you be scared off if a pretty woman came on too strong? Do I fight my nature and "pretend" not to be too interested. (that doesn't sound like fun)...I love the initial initensity...

As you can tell I am pretty confused.....but an honest man's opinion would be nice...

go ahead be brutal....

silly girl

 

Coming on too strong always reeks of desperation to an extent. Probably whats scaring them. Just date for awhile. You are just coming out of a 17 year relationship and all you are thinking about is finding another man. A little alone time would probably be in order. As for your other questions you just have to trust your instincts. You will date bad ones, good ones and those somewhere in between. There are no gaurantees. Just slow the whole process down. Date until you know someone very well before moving in with them. Good Luck.

 

I agree with heid, after all that time , u need a second to ajust n breath a little.
Find out what it is your looking for , dont just find something better...

Ps the way to finding fantastic sexual partners without getting drips... Bring a Rubber

 

Wait... I"m confused as to why you're leaving your husband in the first place. You haven't had sex in five years... is that it? That's a stupid reason. Go have sex with him! If it's bad sex though, then you're gettin in on having a good reason - though I think you should talk with him about it first and see if you can get him to understand how you feel. For all you know, the problem is you, not him. Just being honest here with the information you've given me.

 

haid...yes, coming on too strong is my problemo.....alone time...yes....i've never done that....need too. funny thing is i prefer to be alone most of the time....


one love...um...yes...the solution is obvious...but i was reading where you can get all kinds of "things" even from oral sex...sheesh.

deram....well...i figured i'd have to explain.....the lack of closeness...brought about from me chasing him shamelessly at first and him pushing me away...he said i suffocated him...didn't like to hug or kiss...i should of left then. but i didn't. So eventually, he pushed me away one time too many and I quit. He didn't seem to mind. Then he began pursuing me and I found I was repulsed. I couldn't turn back on. The love making, if you can call it that, was just him getting off. I got to where i hated it. Now, I am called to jack him off when he gets horny. turns my stomach, but I do it.

My fault, of course...but my happiness is my responsibility and I am taking it.

You figure after 5 years of your wife not sleeping with you, you would say SOMETHING.

Leaving him....will be difficult...he's threatened me before....so my difficulties are only beginning....time to see what I"m made of. I'm not a victim....I've accepted the situation up to this point...but now...(another post)....my eyes have been reopened and I find you can't hide from your dreams....you may lay them aside....but your true nature WILL surface...

I wonder how in the world my life ended up in such a disgusting mess...I'm not proud.

Moral....don't take the easy road...