Serious question.Begging for advice try not to laugh:)

Hmm I always feel such a tit when I post in this section
Im not into the "modern man in touch with his feelings "type stuff , to me it sounds one step removed from wearing womens clothes andtaking it up the axxx.
Sorry...

Anyway ,is there such a thing as a "relationship-phobe"?

I work really long hours and travel a lot, and I also enjoy the meeting and seeing different girls - withou having to be "unfaithful" to anyone.
Im buzzing when I first meet someone I like but hate the demands that come later.

Also I havent been in a full on , exclusive relationship with a single girl for quite a while.( 8 months or so)

Usually I'll be seeing a couple of girls casually , and when I feel one is trying to" move in on me" ie go from once a week fun , to a more of a relationship type situation , I try and push her back or finish it off.

I really dont want to have to spend 3 /4 days a week , doing nothing in particular with someone.Nor do I want to stop the fun of freedom to see other people.
Im 29 now ( I thought Idve gone James Dean's way by now)
and wonder , am I a "relationship-phobe".

I see other peoples relationships and see them as compromise and lies , aggro and bullshit.
But I feel like theres a stigma attached to being not properly living with someone at 29
.Like when theres work type "couples dos" and the like and Im always with someone new.
Then some girls say "why arent u settled down"?

Anyway , cut a long story short , is it unhealthy to avoid commited excl
usive relationships at 29?
Does anyone else feel/ act the same?
Many thanks
Best wishes
Ressotaspiks

 

Tick – tick –tick – I think it’s either your biological clock saying time to settle down or you just haven’t met the right gal yet. Cheers and happy weekend!

 

Hi Johnny thanks for your post.

Nah I dont go in for this biological clock thing , Im a believer in immortality ( ok Im slightly insane too

Hmm Ive probably met the right(ish) girls but havent commited- alway said "I havent got the time to commit".

The question I mean to ask is , "is it abnormal for a 29 year old male not to want to settle down ie is it being relationship-phobic?".

Or in other words , am I just making up excuses for myself to not commit?
Its just alot of other people think its abnormal.
I honestly dont know now.

Anyone else any thoughts?

 

nah. not abnormal at all. it's just the rest of them get a divorce because they settled down too young.

 

No, if you don't want it don't force yourself into the stereotype that is relationships. You don't have to go that route. Look at George Clooney. He is a bachelor for life.

You shouldn't do something that doesn't feel right or makes you uncomfortable. Some people just aren't cut out for relationships and there is nothing wrong with that as long as you are up front with the gals you meet and let them know your intentions. I am so sick of society and everyone else putting all of this pressure on people when it is none of their goddamn fucking business.

Good luck.

 

Hi MamaK and Cutelil
Thanks for your posts.
Yeah , except on a few occasions ( ie with a few girls) Ive always felt what u both said.But now I dont know.
Other people with certainly less than perfect relats , there always seems to be a criticism I feel."He still hasnt settled down" etc.
I dont really take their opinions seriously , but I wonder do people put blocks up for themselves?
Sometimes I wonder if Im just being different for the sake of it nowadays.

Actually its girls that see it as a big thing.Girls seem obsessed with relationships IMO.
I say "Im seeing 1/ 2 girls but nothing like bf-gf" .Then they go ( exclaimation) "what u havent got a gf". Then Im like thinking "well so what , it aint like having 2 heads is it"

Its like I feel that they feel its something weird.

Didnt know CLooney was never married.
Anyway Im more handsome than him

 

i really like that buzzz you get the first time your with someone, im addicted to it...
everytime ive found a guy thats good for me i sill end up wanting more... i have a restless soul that makes it hard to settle down, i like lots of changes in my life all the time. but sometimes i too wonder the same thing ressotta, dont feel like u have to settle down just because its what people do at your age, you just do what feels right for you & settle down when your ready too... i see all my freinds settled down together sometimes they look happy together but in general they loook bored...

 

you know, if it's gonna happen, it is. whether you're "blocking" or not. but if it's not gonna happen, it's not gonna happen. i don't understand why everyone has to be in a couple. it suits me, i married my best friend, we love hanging out. but jeez, i've seen way more completely fucked up relationship than good ones. i sometimes wonder why people bother. why make yourself miserable?

 

Nice theory MamaK but I think Ive really been blocking it.
I actually think fear holds a lot of relats together .Ofcourse most couples dont like that pointed out!
Maybe what I need to do is just adjust the balance a bit more.

Mega- yeah Ive always been into the buzz too.
When I hear about young couples doing it once every 4 weeks , Im like "what the fuck are they still together for?".
I heard about this guy who was into the "pick up culture " who said the addiction became like a curse to him tho.

I dunno , anyone ever looked into that polygamy stuff?