My boyfriend, who used to be calm, sweet and happy all the time; is now angry, rude, and sad it seems most of the time. His parents are in the middle of a divorce and he just started a new job thats pretty tough. But its hard for me to watch him be this way. Its also hard for me to deal with it myself, him being so insensitive to me. Hes changed a lot since i met him. Any suggestions on how to deal with this?
When my parents were going through a divorce, I was a bitch to everyone (Not that I'm not anymore ). he may just need time or space for now, until everything's settled down a bit.
i can understand something bad happening and acting totally unlike one`s self. but for me, i would be ok with my partner. hm i just find it odd.
i guess its up to you to decide if its worth it for you to wait until hes come to terms with whtas going on in his life and see if he starts acting a bit more like he used to.. i have had a few friends go through divorces (my folks divorced when iw as 3 so id ont remember it much) and they were havingi a really rough time... i think if their parents were divorcing and their partner left them simultaneously it couldve really changed their opinion of relationships
I understand his parents are going through a divorce, and I feel pretty bad for him. Hes just been acting this way for the past like 4 months and its really effecting our relationship for the worse. You think I should just wait for it to go away then? I just miss his old self. :/ he was such a free spirit.
I think what he probably needs is support from you more than anything. But if you feel the need to tell him how you feel, try to find a gentle way to tell him that you're not belittling what he's going through, but you miss the way he was and hope he realises how he has become. It can be a sensitive place.... so be careful what you say that he doesn't take it the wrong way. Good luck!!
if someone is feeling immensely awful, then how come you aren`t just feeling deeply sorry for him, and thus taking care of him. it shouldn`t be that much of a problem, because you should know who he is inside. and that he is hurting.
I know he feels awful, and I have been especially nice to him lately. Like when he yells at me i usually ask him if he wants a massage to calm him down! cuz i know hes not yelling out of anger toward me, but the situation going on in his life. But that doesnt mean its not hard for me to deal with being yelled at and watching my free spirited boyfriend turn to such an angry man. I just dont want this to last for the rest of his life, and i dont want it to interfere with our relationship.
This actually reminds me of my relationship some time ago;due to my bf's new job and some really fucked up situations with his family he was acting like a total asshole for like 2 months or so...I was really supportive at first but obviously me and patience..well I don't think we've ever met,haha...So I talked to him and I think you sould do that too.Just make sure you won't sound insensitive or fed up.A balanced relationship will help him get over things sooner,that is if he wants it to work. Good luck!
Hmmm...maybe try a more aggressive approach then?Or get him drunk? :tongue: Just remember that it takes two to tango.And if your bf doesn't want,or is too frustrated to work things out with you then I'm sorry but the only thing you can do is let him take care of his issues on his own and move on with your life.
hey were getting drunk tonight and tomorow! Maybe ill try n talk to him. we talk a lot anyways when were drunk.
So I ended up getting drunk with him, and we basically wanted to kill eachother. We started talking about it and he said he didnt want to talk about it so me being drunk, said "no! were gonna talk about it whether you like it or not!" so we argued and somehow got on the topic of us moving out together. apparently he hates that idea. so i said i was gonna move out with my friend roy who is another male. He said like a month ago he was ok with that. and now hes pissed about it. and then i overheard his friend saying he thinks i want to sleep with roy, so thats like real fuckin gay. trying to talk while drinking didnt work. shit.
major issues should be discussed when both o fyou have as clear a head as you can get. substances ie booze and pot are NOT what you should be doing prior to an important discussion
