Financial Dependency in a Relationship...

I Have been in a Long Distance Relationship with my Partner Since December Last Year...

She Lives in the USA...I Live in the UK...

At the End of August...I Plan on moving to be with Her...In the USA...

However...

There is One Thing that Bothers me...Is the Financial Issue...

Currently...All my Savings are Spent Up...

She is Willing for Pay for me to Fly Over...

And to Support me While I am Over There...

But...It just makes me Feel Like a Bum...

I Have Never Had to Rely on Anyone Financialy in a Relationship Before...

money Does Not matter to be at All...

And...I Have Nothing to Offer Her Currently...Except my Love...

I just Seem...Looking on as an Outsiders Perspective...

That...She is the One with the money...While I Have Non...

But...I Don't Care About money...At All...

 

Is it the outsiders opinions you are worried about? To me this should not really matter, as long as you and your partner are being honest & true to one another and most of all respectful.

I'm sure there are things you can/could do to balance out her being the bread-winner; like cleaning and taking care of the house, or growing copious amounts of marijuana for you both to smoke Hehe, whatever works. Just be honest about any concerns/worries you have, afterall if you can be upfront and real with anyone it should be the person you're moving across the world to be with.

 

make sure you get a work visa if you can when you ge tthere, and then you can help support yourself as well
otherwise play housewife, do all the cooking and cleaning and laundry and all that jazz

 

Give yourself a chance , once you get used to your new home then you can get a job and go to school......No one expects things overnite. As far as me having money , yes....I have my own home and land , but I am Also older , and have had lots of years to gather things .....but..thats all they are ...THINGS.........

 

ah get a job??any body can clean house but it's not the same as contributing to the household.

 

She's quite a bit older than you and seems like she wants to take care of you. Nothing wrong with that. If you were in a hetrosexual relationship with a man no one would think a thing of it.
Plus, your leaving your home to be with her...that's a big sacrifice and as she said she just wants you comfy and settled in. Just chill and accept your prob not going to be equals and enjoy the sexual chemistry that creates.

 

Just what we need, another freeloader.

 

you're such a stand up guy; aren't you. I bet you attract all the attractive, intelligent and domesticated chicks.

 

Im sorry , I know i shouldnt say anything but i just HAVE to.....I have noticed that you seem to have a nasty comment to make about nearly every thing that Mud posts .....what is your problem man ?
If you have no kind words or actual advice , PLEASE keep your rude comments and hate to yourself !

 

Oh, it's not just with her. it's with every girl on the forum who is younger than him or who has found hapiness and love. He has a problem with contentment and people leading a happy life.

 

every one has a right to his or her own opinion and i agrree that he is going to be a freeloader. i can't believe someone would wrtie about what to do about a situation like this.in america we are equals and that means when it comes time to pay the bills you split 50/50.no freeloaders aloud and any woman who says i'll take financial care of you will eventually grow to resent the freeloader and get tired of pullng all the weight.trust me i speak from experience, and in case some of you have forgotten this is a FREE SPEECH FORUM we have just as much right to agree or disagree as you do.

 

They're both women, in a lesbian relationship.

And in case you are wondering...there are some people in this country who still think enough of men to put their trust in them to support their family and who do not coninualy try to cut off their balls. And believe it or not there are some men who actually enjoy still being men. Go figure eh?
I am not going to let women like you ruin what I know is right for me for the sake of political correctness.
http://www.visionforumministries.org/issues/family/the_feminization_of_the_family.aspx

 

Yes , its a free speech forum , but that doesnt mean its Ok to constantly go round spewing smart ass comments to everyones post and talking hateful trash. There is a LINE between useful comments and trying to start shit....Miee27

 

of course...thats just my own opinion

 

Funny how she finds something wrong with you getting muddie a plane ticket to live with you, but articulated in another thread there is nothing wrong with a woman's husband having a 2-year-long affair on her without her knowledge...sounds like her values are a little skewed.

 

Bella Désordre...I Would Like to Thnk You for your Input in this Thread...

Your Replies Certainly Help make me Feel Less a Bum...

And it is True...If This was Hetrosexual Relationship...No One Would Have much of an Opinion Against that...
I Have Never been to America Before...It is Going to be a Big Change for me in Every Possible Way...
But I am Sure it is Worth it to be with Her...

mlee27...I Do Not Plan on Forever Having my Partner Support me...I am Talking About Her Paying for me to Fly Over...And for Her Supporting me While I am There...Until I Can Then Start Looking for a Job and Working Out Visa's and Such...
I made this Thread because I Feel Bad that I am Accepting Her Offer to Do this...

I am Willing to Do Anything my Partner Asks of me While I am There...I am Not One to Sit Around on my Arse All Day...

As Soon as I Can Get a Job There...The Better...Because I want to Spoil that Woman with Lovely Surprises...

Willow_Jon...I Often Wonder What I Ever Did to Deserve you...And I Do Feel a Bum that I am Unabe to Get myself Over There without Help...I am Just Not Used to People Providing for me in Such a Way...
I want to Spoil You myself!
I am Willing to Work my Arse Off for you Darling...
But Until I Can Provide for myself....And make Contributions to your House and Bills..I am Going to Feel Like a Bum...As it is Not my Style...

 

You're 21, enjoy it and enjoy her and let her enjoy you. I'm getting married to someone a bit older than me and I am moving there and do not have a position lined up. i do not feel guilty or bad in anyway. He asked me to marry him because he wants to be my husband and take care of me. I don't think Geri asked you to come over so she could see you stress out about it. I think she did because she loves you. You are both making sacrifices, just in very different ways.

Enjoy yourself. I know I am going to enjoy being an awesome wife until I find a position I love and am going to enjoy having the time to make him really happy in the begning.
Everything happens for a reason. Put your trust in the higher power and let everything flow. Or if that's too scary, put your trust in Geri as she seems more rationale than you right now because you are going through a huge transition. Transitions are tough.
Also, don't forget about school!!!!!!

 

nevermind ont he don't forget about school part...that was more of a note to myself

 

you both want to be with each other.. and if you can, why not?