Hey all, My fiancee and I have been dating for about 5 years, and are getting married next year. The problem is that over the course of the last five years our sex life has declined dramatically. It used to be every day, but in the last year or so it has gotten to be about 3-4 times a week. I realize that this may still be good in some of your books, but I would like it more. I think that a lot of the problem is me. I love masterbating, and on days when I have masterbated I definately could care less wether or not we have sex. I have tried to cut back on the porn consumption, but it's like every time her back is turned I'm back on. I think alot of the problem is that I prefer what the girls online are willing to do. That's not to say that I'm being unrealistic, expecting my fiancee to be a "dirty little slut" but I would enjoy a little bit of head every once in a while. It seems as if she thinks 15-20 seconds before sex is plenty. I have tried enticing her to do more by giving her more head, but she claims she doesn't like it, and never has. She has only finished me with head once, and then has only swallowed 3 times, all of those times I either jerked off until I was almost there, or it was after a long session of sex. I don't know what to do but I'd love her to be more excited about sex. Any suggestions?
if she doesn tlike giving head, that probably wont ever change but, what about discussing your fantasies together? if you fantasize about oral sex then let her know, and ask about one of her fantasies, and if youre both comfortable with them then you get to act them out!
Wow, are you sure you aren't about to get married to my fiancee. Just consider yourself lucky you still get it 3-4 times a week. I can't remember the last time my fiancee and I had sex 3 times in a week. I'm lucky if I get it more than once a week these days.
lol Planar you sound like me, and yes you can become desensitised to 'normal' sex ifyou watched to much pornz. Howeverr!!!! Just cos its in a porn doesn't mean its "unattainable and unrealistic". Im very open about the things i find hot in the pornz i look at, and YOU shouldn't feel guilty about viewing them, think of it as "education". The way i see it, GOOD porn will give you IDEAS that you can use to enhance your sex life. You should deff talk about your fantasy's with eachother. Also if your girl doesnt like giving oral, try drinking orange or pinapple juice and just eat lots of fruit together before hand, it makes cum taste sweet (makes girls taste better too) which might help make the idea of oral more appealing to her. What i did with my partner recently was i had him write up all the things he likes, what his fantasies were ect, in a little note and vice versa. That way you can talk about your fantasies and yet avoid any shyness (if she's a really shy person) because you can read your letters to each other in private.
5 years and the sex life has been cut in half? I was married for more than 25 years and I can't remember when we had sex less than 5 times a week. (Except when she was recovering from having children) I guess we are just very sexual people. She swallowed 3 times in five years? My five swallowed ONCE in 25 years, so you are way ahead of the game there. If getting head is important to you, then don't marry her. She won't change. If head isn't that important to you, then get married and follow the advice of the other members that have responded to your thread. Oh, does she watch the porn with you? My wife only watched porn with me three times. And she didn't really seem to enjoy it.
This sounds a lot like me as well. My fiance and I use to have sex once a day atleast. Now I've gone as long as 2 weeks without sex. Also the part about porn and mastervating is the same to. I trying to cut back but I'm in the same boat, For some reason I have to look at it. Another thing is she used to give me head all the time. Now I can't get it at all. She claims she doesn't like it (giving or recieving) and not she is more comfortable telling me that. I'm stuck with just having sex. No playing before hand...
You're fucked man. The minute she gets that ring it's all over. Try 3 or 4 times a month. Then come the kids... Once a month if you're lucky. Go backpack across europe and wear your dick out on the locals. Then go home and get hitched. You've only got one life to live - use it wisely and ENJOY it...
