Long time gf refuses to give head.

So... I have my girlfriend of a year and a couple months and after multiple attempts of discussing it (in and out of sex) she plain is not going to do it, even though I have gone down on her at least one out of every two time we have had sex. I feel that sex should be about free expression and new experiments (as I have told her repeatedly) and although reciprocity should not be taken into account in sex (for various technical reasons) I just think it would be nice. It has been only recently in our relationship that she has been comfortable in from behind positions and I think that it is quite, well, lame... that she doesn't want to. She tried it before when quite drunk (and it was very painful since she didn't know what the fuck was going on, draggin her teeth and such) to no avail and I told her to stop.

Some of my other girl friends told me that it's bullshit that she hasn't given me head at least once in our relationship even though I go down on her a lot.

Opinions? Advice? Any would be helpful.

 

Find another GF

My ex wouldn't do it. I kept trying for 11 years.
Then I got divorced, for a lot of reasons but her unwillingness to try anything out of missionary was a real big part that only got worse and more frustrating over the years.

 

my gf was quite reserved with oral sex, so we talked and we walk it trought, she didn even let me give her any, but we went taking small steps and now she loves it, It happend the same with anal and other stuff but she just needed q get used to the idea

 

stop going down on her until she agrees to do it.

 

d-u-m-p h-e-r ...this is basic, give & take...think about the long term.

 

dump her... if she is not giving head what does she does? just lays down and spreads her legs? boring.... if she doesnt give oral, does she gives something else?

 

I'm gonna have to go with the majority, lose her, in the long term this will never work out
especailly not wiht your happiness intact

 

Dump her and run man!

I luv fucking a woman's ass, and let me tell you if my wife was not into it, I would have been gone a long time ago.

Get out now, cut you're losses and find somebody that enjoys doing what you enjoy and by the way you'll have to please her as far as what she likes too!

But that's the fun of it !!!

If it's a hassle get the hell out now.

 

The thing is, is its not really a hassle... its just dumb reasoning on her part. She "doesn't like it". So, when I go down on her, and she hasn't exactly been keeping up on her cleanliness down there, I don't tell her that she smells and I'm not going to do it. I think its partially on the same level. And yeah.. the sex is getting pretty boring. The only way I can really do it nowadays is to be drunk, otherwise its not very much fun. Companionship is great though, I just need to weigh it all out to see if its worth it. I want a girl that can groove, you know? Whatever. Thanks for the advice, but more would be greatly appreciated, like from a woman's standpoint would be excellent.

 

Like I said it's time to "Get on the bus Gus"

 

well, that does sorta change things a bit
I was assuming it was frustrating you because of your wants, not because of logical fallacy :tongue:

I'd say to be happy in your relationship, you have to have good sexual relations, but that's not always 100% true, really, you just gotta feel it out, and figure out what seems best

 

I was with a gurl for over 2 years and she never did it either, now im recently single and ready to finally get pleasured that way.

 

most people dont change. i dont really understand why now it ssuddenly a huge bother whereas when you started dating her it was ok

i understand requring sexual compatibility. i wouldnt date a guy long term who wouldnt go down on me. but... id be annoyed if somethign like this broke up a relationship after hed already known about what i do and dont do after so long (ie if he now decided that me not doing golden showers was a dealbreaker, since i do enjoy oral sex). i think its a bit bitchy to use it as your excuse now, but i totally understand requriing sexual compatibility with your partner

 

I agree with allonym. Its a pretty stupid thing to break up over, because getting head isn't really that important. I don't tell my girl to do anything she doesn't like to do when it comes to our sexlife, but we made a deal to try anything at least twice if the other wanted to, then make a decision about it. For instance, being bound isn't my thing, but i did it twice, for her. And she's not into cos-play (though i thought i was a pretty sexy Clifford TBRD, XD jk).

 

well, it depends all on general happiness
and in his original pos,t it seemed as if it was really bothering him

 

Well, i can't help but see it as a personal problem if sombody NEEDED oral sex. If the only thing he has to complain about is not getting oral, then he has it pretty good. I may just be young, but sex only becomes boring if you're getting it often imo. Especially for males. Like a fat kid at the end of a convayor belt of chocolate cake. Pretty soon, he's gonna hate cake.

 

Ok you want a woman's standpoint, here... Frist off, she might not like it because she doesn't know how to do it and she feels really dumb about it, or, she feels violated with her head in your crouch... By the way, it would be a wise idea to tell her that she needs to clean more, otherwise you wont eat her out any more....Also, did you take her verginaity? If you didn't, then how do you know she hasn't be raped before and that was one thing that they made her do... or if she was ever molested, that could have been one the things they made her do.... Also, bring up that you not happy with you sex life and have her watch alot of porn, that might spice things up.... if not that might actually mean that she is faking about likeing sex and is only doing it because you want it....

 

Don't you think you're being rather petty here?

You describe her as your girlfriend, not just a sexual partner, and despite a relationship being a 2 way thing with give & take, although she may not be able to bring herself to give oral - after all, that's a total turn-off to some people - you should also accept that it's a turn off for her. After all, most men would count their blessings that they even get as far as having any kind of sexual relations with their girlfriend.

Also, don't forget that oral sex, although often highly enjoyable, is not part of the natural procreative act, so when someone is led by the instinct to breed, the main drive would be for intercourse itself, not to give oral, although the male would be driven to at least smell the vagina to find whether or not the female in question is on heat.

For us to consider that humans are anything other than animals with the same innate instincts would simply be plain arrogance.

 

God, my man won't go down on me and I love oral...I suck his cock everyday...and I love it..I totally know how you feel..its ridiculous. I tried everything..I stopped sucking his cock, got all domineering, wouldn't fuck him...tried to talk...still nothing works..and I'm fucking hot! Guys hit on me everyday...and Im trying sooo hard not to cheat...but its frustrating. And its not like my pussy is nasty. I wax for god sakes..clean, pink, hot! He's the only BF ive ever had who has a hangup...i guess some people are just uptight or scared or something..how does she know she doesn't like it if she won't try?

 

Show me a man who does eat pussy and I'll show you a woman I can have.

The saying goes the same for women who suck