1. If a person is introverted, it does NOT mean they are shy or anti-social. This is probably THE biggest misconception that extroverts tend to have when it comes to introverts. And you can’t really blame them for having that kind of misconception. Extroverts tend to have to drag introverts to parties, to convince them to go and sell them on attending social engagements. When introverts politely decline, extroverts automatically assume that something might be wrong so they always ask if everything’s all right and of course, everything is all right. It’s just a common misunderstanding. When extroverts see a pattern like this developing, they automatically assume that introverts are shy or anti-social as that can be the only logical explanation to them. What’s more, when extroverts try to engage introverts in small talk, it seems like they hit a brick wall. Add to that, most extroverts see that introverts tend to be fond of engaging in solitary activities such as reading, writing, and daydreaming. Well, if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, it must be a duck right? Wrong. Introverts have more brain activity in their frontal lobes and when these areas are activated through solitary activity, introverts become energized through processes such as problem solving, introspection, and complex thinking. Extroverts on the other hand tend to have more activity in the back of their brain, areas that deal with processing sensory information from the external world, so they tend to search for external stimuli in the form of interacting with other people and the outside world to energize them. There’s a deeper science to this that involves differences in the levels of brain chemicals such as acetylcholine and dopamine in extroverts and introverts, but I won’t get into that. The bottom line is that introverts are just wired differently than extroverts. There’s nothing “wrong” with them. They just become energized through different processes depending on where the majority of their brain activity takes place. Granted there are introverts who may be shy and anti-social, but that’s just a coincidence that perpetuates the myth that ALL introverts are like that. You’ll find that all introverts are fine just the way they are until people begin to subtly suggest otherwise. 2. Introverts tend to dislike small talk. If you really want to engage an introvert in conversation, skip the small talk. Introverts tend to love deep conversations on subjects that interest them. They love to debate, go past the superficial and poke around the depths in people’s minds to see what’s really going on in there. Most, if not all introverts tend to regard small talk as a waste of time, unless it’s with someone new they just met. This characteristic probably contributes to another misconception that extroverts have of introverts - the misconception that all introverts are arrogant. Why? Because extroverts notice that introverts don’t talk that much with other people. Therefore, extroverts assume that introverts think they’re too good to talk to others, hence arrogant and that’s hardly the case. It’s just a matter of preference. Extroverts thrive on small talk. Introverts abhor it. There’s nothing wrong with either choice, it’s just a matter of preference. This brings us to the third point. 3. Introverts do like to socialize – only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts. Yes, it’s true. Contrary to the majority of public opinion, introverts do like to socialize, but again, only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts. Introverts love anything that involves deep conversation. They get energized by discussing subjects that are important to them and they love see what and how other people think, to connect the dots, to dig deep, to find root causes, to use logical thinking via debate in conversation, etc. And what’s more, introverts can do a lot of things extroverts are naturally good at - give great speeches, schmooze with everyone, be the life of the party, charm the socks off of total strangers - but only for a short period of time. After that, they need time for themselves which brings us to the fourth point. 4. Introverts need time alone to recharge. Extroverts tend to think introverts have something against them as they constantly seem to refuse generous invites to social engagements. Introverts do appreciate the offers, but it’s just that they know it will take a lot of energy out of them if they pursue these social functions. They need time alone like they need food and water. Give them their space. There’s nothing wrong with them. They’re not depressed and they’re not sad. They just need time alone to recharge their batteries. 5. Introverts are socially well adjusted. Most introverts are well aware of all the social nuances, customs, and mannerisms when it comes to interacting with other people, but they simply don’t socialize as much as extroverts, which makes it easy for extroverts to assume that introverts are not socially well adjusted, as they have not seen much evidence of them interacting with other people. This just exacerbates previous misconceptions and gives way to labeling introverts as nerds, geeks, loners, etc. It’s easy to understand why society tends to value extroverts over introverts. Human beings have lived in a tribal society so having to interact frequently with people came to be a regarded as a very good skill when it came to survival. But because of this high value placed on extroversion, introverts tend to feel trapped and find themselves in a catch 22 situation. Do introverts stay true to who they are and risk social alienation and isolation or do introverts conform and join the extroverted side, pretending to be somebody they’re not just to fit in? This is precisely why I wrote this article, because if the extroverts can become more educated about introverts, introverts will be able to feel free to stay true to who they are, and that’s a good thing from society’s point of view. Trying to “turn” an introverted person into an extroverted person is detrimental because it gives off a subtle suggestion that there is something wrong with them, hampering their self worth and esteem when there is absolutely nothing wrong in the first place. There’s nothing wrong with introverts. In fact, introverts are the leading pioneers of advancements in human civilization. Albert Einstein, Issac Newton, Charles Darwin are a few introverts that come to mind, just to name a few. And for those of you not interested in science, but pop culture, you’ll be surprised to see a lot of well known names in Hollywood are introverts as well. Julia Roberts, Steven Spielberg, Tom Cruise to name a few as well. And for those interested in sports, Michael Jordan and Tiger Woods come to mind as athletes who are introverts as well. Introverts have a lot to bring to the table. They have an amazing ability to discover new thoughts, an uncanny ability to focus, to concentrate, to connect the dots, to observe and note things that most people miss, to listen extremely well and are often found having a rich and vivid imagination too. The more extroverts become knowledgeable about introverts, the less tension and misunderstanding there will be among the two. So if you’re an introvert reading this, send a copy of this article to all your extrovert friends so they can get a better idea of what you’re all about. It’s time to finally clear the air. Taken from http://briankim.net
interesting....kinda skimmed it i am a bit of an introvert....but i highly enjoy lots of small talk and socializing in familiar settings. it just takes me a bit longer to warm up to what is going on. so i'm bit of both. deep conversations can be quite lame, when you get someone who just wants to be deep so they can be cool and sound smart.
summation: introverts gain energy by being alone, but still like people, are normal and generally socially adjusted um, yeah, i knew that. then agin, im an introvert who likes to research slightly oddball things now and then. i requir ealone time to keep my sanity
allonym is right with energy any person can behave either way its just about which requires more focused energy
while anyone CAN, at least for a while, act in appearance of either mode, for each of us, one or the other is more comfortable, natural, sustainable, compatable with our intrinsic internal spiritness we are born with, then the other. nor is it in any way, good, natural, nor healthy, to attempt to force everyone to HAVE to all emulate the same mode in order to survive. doing so, while it may go unnoticed to the one, is total repressive tyranny to the other. and this goes equally for both. nor is either any more nor less, normal, natural, moral or healthy then the other. forcing anyone who is naturally one, to have to act as the other in order to get by, is what pushes them over the brainbow. there are just as many for whome either is the more natural as there is for whome it is the other. and for whome, it is just as unnatural and unhealthy to have the other forced on them. that's is really at the root of the problem of the totally unneccessary either or ness of competitivenessism vs egalitarianism. both impose this abuse on one or the other half of the population. and there's nothing more or less natural about either of them either. that is why, for a society to not by tyrannical to one or the other, it must make as nearly as possible, opportunities equal for both. meaning both in their natural state, not both only if one or the other forces themselve to emulate what is unnatural and unhealthy for them. that is why todays corporatocracy usurped america is so totally tyrannical to so many of us. not only in what it is trying to impose on the rest of the planet, but what it is to at least half of us internally as well. that it is possible to get rich, doesn't make any less tyrannical to try and force everyone to have to, especially when in the neighborhood of ten percent HAVE TO NOT BE IN ORDER FOR IT TO WORK. universal abundance IS possible, for BOTH extroverts AND introverts, but not by trying to make everything have to begin and end with the pretentions of symbolic value. =^^= .../\...
Yeah I have this great book called "The Introvert Advantage"- anyways yeah, I'm a total introvert but not shy.... totally diff. story....
I'm more introverted. I hate it when people take it as I am trying to be ani social or something. If I don't have anything to say I don't say it... but when I do I will. I feel like there is more to gain anyway from listening then doing all the talking
I'm an introvert too. You wouldn't really notice it if you saw me in person; I'm very loud and energetic and just plain social. But I find the most draining thing in the world is being with people, and I much prefer time with myself. Like for every hour I'm with friends, I need about two hours with myself to wind down. Of course, everybody thinks my company is the best. I rule. Yes. I'm THAT full of myself. :H
I would venture to guess most people that spend time posting online and shit tend to be introverted. max, I think we are basically saying the same thing haha. Yeah whichever is most natural is going to be your equilibrium, but a person is not one or the other. An extravert will gain energy from things that are draining to an introvert and vice versa. But its not some polarized thing where half of the humans are one or the other, its very dynamic. As a kid I was always in my own world, always introspective. So what happened is i didnt develop some social skills and then became uncertain of myself after i started being unprepared to deal with social shit in adolescence. I think thats where the idea comes from that introverts are shy, because we miss social cues. Once I addressed that stuff and balanced myself I found I am definitely both. Sometimes I am social, crazy, and want to have fun. Other times I want to sit inside and not answer my phone. If I had to pick one to label myself it would be introvert because I am always fucking deep in thought. but I am really against the idea that a person is one or the other. There are different degrees to everything. I also think its healthy to push introverts focus outward at times. Its all about growth. But thats just me.
Makes me feel better when i am in introvert mode, you know? Cause you can let comparisons between yourself and others get to you, but it shouldnt. I am a social butterfly but when I do go into my front brained self, introvert and daydreaming, thinking real deep, this is just another really important part of yourself.
Exactly I think people that lack one should work on it, because they are just different aspects of living and thats enrichening. Even carl jung said its not a good way to classify personality. In psychology its degree of introversion/extraversion, and what that influences
