In case you're wondering, Bill is the part of me that consumes stupid ass drugs. I can finally say I was sober for today, but it'll take time for me to snap back to reality. Basically I want to stop doing everything especially the one that recently invaded my brain the one with the name of lady cocaine. Here is a poem I've written about this b/s. The only way to kill Bill is to not give him something else. That's what he really wants, so you kill yourself. The past week, I don't know, maybe two, have been fucked up, and completely blown through. The only time Bill is happy is when it's payday, then everything turns to mayday, after that it'll be a yayday. I also am sick of feeding mouthes that don't need to be fed, all it really does is block out their dread. Some claim without it they can't get to bed. Wishing they could snowplow 'till it consumes their head. I try telling myself I'm much stronger than that, it always so happens to be after the fact. There is no need for me to get high, it doesn't change the way I see with my eye, only leaves me wanting to scream why. This poem I've written has given me more free will, and extra realization that I need to kill Bill. 'Cause Bill is a bastard, only bringing me down, it'll seem I am happy when he is around, but really my face wears only a frown.
Kicking everything is what i'm trying to do, coke aint gonna be hard to do without because i've only done it the past week or two. I am trying to get out of the lifestyle that i've put myself in the past couple of years.
at first I thought stonerbill did something wrong.... good luck man, complete lifestyle changes can be tough, at least they were for me. But once I got out and got my head on straaight I was able to realign things from multiple lifestyles to keep things I enjoyed in moderation.
That's great that you want to change your life, and quit the drugs, but you shouldn't be so down on yourself. I guess I don't really know if you are doing that or not, but your poem is a bit depressing. My fiance does coke, and he won't quit. It's fucking up our relationship. If he could just smoke pot with me things would be so great.. But he's a union carpenter, and I guess there is this code or something that says that all union carpenters have to be drunks and coke addicts. Not really.. I'm kidding, but it's sort of true since his brother, and ALL of his coworkers do it. They were all recently laid off for 3 weeks now for their partying. I used to do coke. I loved it the first time I tried it, and I just couldn't get enough. I stopped though a few months before I found out I was pregnant, and haven't used it for 2 years. Good luck, but you should keep with the pot. At least smoke it every once in awhile. It's great.
I don't really wanna touch any drugs all together for a long while even if you think it is just weed, that shit makes me depressed. I need a month minimum to recoop. Fuck blow though, god damn that shit is retarded.
If you really want to you can always do it, just dont make excuses for yourself. I know that's what I used to do, it's ok.. it's a bday and ok, I'll only do it with certain people, just things I would say to justify it and make it ok. I always found the hardest to tell people close to me and that I love that I dont want to do it, because well Im used to being in the same mental state as them. The first thing I did was to tell everybody that I wasnt doing coke anymore.. still people offer, because they are "polite", just turn up the volume of your inner voice when it says no, because we always say no inside, just end up snorting the line for no other reason than because it's there. Good Luck VolcomStoner, it's hard but it's easy too.
anything can be concidered a drug when used illegally.. paints not a drug.. but it becomes one when you start huffing it... dont kid yourself.. marijuana is a drug.. just not as harmful as some other drugs
are you like physically addicted to cocaine? if you are- smoke weed till that physical addiction goes away. if your getting baked all day, youll just be happy and wont feel like shit so much... then after a couple days stop smoking pot if you want, and youll be all good. if its a mental addiction your struggling with, sack up and quit the shit. thats all it comes down to. if the mental craving for cocaine is that bad, its only gonna get worse. just stop using it, stop thinking about it, just be done with it. complaining about how hard it is to quit wont get you anywhere, so just do it. best of luck, enjoy your sobriety.
Good luck man. I kicked Coke in May and I can tell you I don't regret kicking it. After you get far enough away from it you realize just how stupid it is. You can do it!
