What I Hate About My Athiest Friend

Whenever I talk about Christmas coming up or something like that my friend, who is strongly Athiest (I'm Catholic), says something like, "Jesus doesn't even exist!" I get really upset when she says things like that to me. Its not like I tell her she's going to hell because she's an Athiest. I'm completely comfortable hanging around with people of all races and creeds. Its just when she says hurtful things like this that I get upset. Does any of your Athiest friends do this to you, or do you do this to anyone?

 

If you truly love God, you should be able to just laugh it off and say "I love you anyway!" haha
Do you ever tell your friend how much it bothers you?

 

What the hell?

 

Hell doesn't even exist!

 

We should not be in the business of offending people's deeply held beliefs just for the sake of it, but sometimes the lunacy of a given belief needs to be pointed out in a friendly way. If I mistakenly believed that all that cars were made out of chocolate I would be grateful to the person who pointed out my error.

The trouble is religions are set up so that any criticism of their truth claims, no matter how well intentioned, constructive or friendly, is always taken as an affront. Religions play the offence card at the slightest hint of a challenge. I enjoy it when people challenge my atheism, it makes me think about my beliefs and why I hold them. You too should welcome criticism of your faith, it will make you re-examine why you think the way you do. If your beliefs cannot stand up to the most basic of criticisms then they are almost certainly not worth believing in...

 

Meggles, are you really upset that an atheist would denounce Jesus in your presence or is it more that deep down you know she stands on the logical high ground and telling someone who does not believe in hell that they are going to hell isn’t exactly going to shatter their world. In fact being of the faithfully inclined you do not have any solid rebuttal that you can use on your friend.

Do you feel your faith is on thin ice? Do you dare accept the logical likelihood that a man named Jesus was nothing more than a man and there never was or never will be a supernatural savior?

After all, how could a supernatural savior of mankind sit back for nearly 2 thousand years as his name is used for every evil from rape and torture to war and genocide and not return to stop the bloodshed of millions!?

 

its funny how saying something is offensive constitutes an argument

 

My friends are mostly Christian but since I find their religious beliefs repugnant I just tell them to shut up every time they try to let something slip.

 

sounds like your friend has a chip on her shoulder.

 

I used to be opinionated and argumentative.
These days I'll offer an opinion only if it's asked of me. And even then I might not.

I rather ask questions than answer them.

Incidentally, to offer an opinion, I think asking questions and listening is the way to reach a compromise wherever there is difference.

 

I feel completely happy with my religion, I just think its wrong to be making fun of someone because of their religion, or critisizing that person. I wouldn't tell her that she's gonna burn in hell, and its silly that she would do that to me.

 

You've said that before. I heard you, not to worry. Good luck in any case.

 

She respects her friends beliefs, her friend should respect hers.

 

Once we get beyond platitudes, we can start understanding the dynamic between these two friends.

Rather than "shalls" and "shall nots", why don't we ask ourselves what each of them feel they have to gain in getting on about conceptual "beliefs"?

Does "belief" keep them from exposing themselves further to each other as friends?

Is belief a protective layer that keeps each of them safely entombed in the cocoon of their innermost private feelings?

 

Was the friend making fun of you or the religion? By saying "Jesus doesnt (didn't?) exist" It's not a personal insult. And why should religion be treated with any special respect, it should be subject to the same ammount of questioning as any other belief, even more so actually as it is about a pretty important subject to a lot of people.

 

To be fair, did she say you were an idiot or something like that? Did she attack your person or your beliefs? If all she said was Jesus doesn't exist, that shouldn't be offensive. A bit harsh, yes, but it would be more constructive for you to respond with an argument of some kind. Why you believe what you believe.

It sounds to me like your friend wants to debate theology with you.

 

If you don't want to debate theology, that's your prerogative. Just tell that to your friend, and let her know that you'd prefer her not to say negative things about someone you hold dear, namely Jesus. If she won't respect that, maybe you should find a different "friend". I, myself, think theological arguments are fun. Why not reply with reasons why you think Jesus was real or important? Think it through. You might even pretest it in this forum, the Christian forum, and/or Sanctuary. If your only reason is that it's your faith (as many have said), some of us might ding you for it, but it's your choice what you believe.

 

Yeah, I think it's rude - not to mention pointless - to disparage another person's beliefs. It makes atheists look bad, just like people who wander around in the street yelling about Jesus make religious people look bad. Debate's great, but when it starts getting impolite, no one's doing anyone any favors.

Blows me away that someone could think saying "Jesus doesn't exist!" would change anyone's mind.

 

If anyone saying anything about whatever you choose for your own life upsets you then you should re-define what you think. If you truely believe any religion or philosophy, then no one should be able to upset or deter you by just words.

 

Well, in Christianity... Jesus doesn't really "exist" in the same sense that me and you exist, so your friend is actually partially right without attacking your religion.

Seriously though... you have to realize that religion has become the target of much ridicule among young people. We're a new generation that's a lot more informed globally. Information and knowledge seems to be religion's counter-part; the more there is of it, the less there is of religion. People find it easy to kid about religion and many even take comfort in offending someone who is religious because they have had to live through some kind of religious persecution (Being forced to go to church, not being accepted by parents/peers because of non-Christian beliefs, and so on... I'm sure you get my point).

So yeah, you just have to start adapting to this modern world. Really can't let every little thing offend you, gotta toughen up a little. As Relayer said, it shouldn't bother you if you truly love God.