I am in a new relationship, been together for 4 months. He is a wonderful guy and makes me feel so good. I have a little issue though ... TRUST! I don't know why, I've been in a few relationships and never had my heart broken, I've never had friends do anything to hurt me, I don't understand. Basicly everytime I don't know what my bf is doin, my mind starts to wonder if he's with someone else, maybe not even physically but maybe on cam or something. There is a part of me that has considered putting a fake profile on gay.com and "testing" him, I mean i haven't done it, but i've thought it ... I dunno there is a part of me believes that he would Never cheat on me, but at the same time if he did, how would I ever find out ... right? It's just so easy (i've never done it, but I know lots of gay men who have). I don't want this to ruin our relationship, I really feel that this might be "the one". I think people might say, "well u just gotta trust," and that means nothing to me, what I wanna know is HOW?? I don't know how to do it. I never have ...
Start by talking to him. Trust is a difficult thing to reach, and it may take a little longer than 4 months. You're investing a lot in this relationship, emotionally. The first time you really do that can be scary because, as you said, you'd never been hurt before, and you're probably not very keep to know what it's like. What you should do is tell him everything that you said in your post with all honesty. As long as you both know where the other is coming from, what you're both looking for in the relationship, then it'll be a lot easier to start trusting each other. But be careful with the paranoia, that can push people away.
Good post, but this: is an understatement. BTW, (just curious) how would it be possible to test someone w/out their knowledge with a fake profile on gay.com? Whatever it entails, don't do it - sounds like just about the worst thing to do to ascertain his level of trustworthiness.
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh first off don't do the fake profile thing, that's really messed up. second, chill the fk out dude, if he wants to be with someone else then let it be, pushing to find out if he's cheating or not isn't gonna help. i don't really have an answer to your trust issue but to enjoy your freakin relationship while it last. stop worrying so much, if you do it'll only be for the worse.
ah, that's exactly how i am! I've never had a boyfriend, but my best friend(who i had a crush on) i felt like he was secretly doing shith with other good friends of his...haha wat a mess that was.
