Okay...so I'm a junior in high school and today I found out this girl likes me from a bunch of her friends. She apparently wanted me to find this out but from what I've heard, she got pissed off at her friends for telling other people. I haven't talked to her yet about this. She's in my English class and it was very uncomfortable today...she sits on the other side of the room and neither of us said anything. I probably talk to her more on myspace and facebook than in person. The thing is, I really don't want to go out with her, but I would feel terrible if I didn't ask her out. I think all of her friends are expecting me to ask her out now too. I've never had a girlfriend before and I guess I'm going to wind up asking her out anyway tomorrow. I just don't know what I'm gonna say. Any advice before 7am tomorrow would be greatly appreciated.
Well if you dont wanna go out with her, just ask her on like a 'friends date" but dont say "just as friends" like invite a friend and maybe she'll invite a friend. Im guessing thats what you want. bit confusing
Chances are that she will be more upset when she finds out that you really didnt want to go out with her, but did it anyways. Be honest, tell her you are flattered but don't see her that way. The whole "I dont want to get serious right now" or " I dont want to screw up our friendship" speech. Yeah, she might get mad but she will get over it. If I were her I would feel like shit if I found out the guy I liked took me on a "pity date." That seriously fucks with someones self esteem. Just reverse the situation, and think about how you'd feel if she went out with you as a "pity date".
Typical male pressure. Believe me, if it was the other way around you would be creepy or a butt of many jokes. Women are not going to be nearly as sensitive toward you most of your life. So... If you don't like her. Don't do it. If she actually likes you there is no reason she shouldn't initiate toward you. But likely she won't. For whatever reason, women almost never do.
Meh, male pressure? So, if I do this middle school-Saved By the Bell-charade and get one of my friends to tell a man that I like him, then they would go out with me regardless if they are interested? Lol, hmm, I'm going to have to hear your reasoning behind this statement, please, do tell?
i had a similar problem like that once. i ended up deciding to just hang out with her as friends an make absolutly no sign that i had any interest in her or that i knew she was interested in me. thats probably the wrong thing to do tho. i wouldnt advise it. i'm sure some one is going to ask "how did it turn out?" well, the answer is: it's still going on and i'm still playing the same charade as i was in the begining
I would go on one date and see how it goes, what have you got to lose? You might even end up liking her but if not then you cant say you never tried.
That's what I decided to do. One of the reasons I didn't want to turn her down was because I've done that before without thinking about it and I deeply regret it. I haven't really had a decent conversation with her so I barely know her so we're probably going to the mall this weekend or something.
Buddy, do you not want to see this girl? Don't let her pressure you into seeing her, you have to be the man and make the decisions. Surprise her, don't ask her out tomorrow, put it off until you now exactly where you want to take her, and then present that to her, with confidence. You don't want to be in the awkward open-ended "Do you wanna go out with me?" "Umm...idk we could hang out at the mall or something..." It feels really awkward and makes you look weak... if you want to hang out with her than you want her to be attracted to you, especially because her friends are watching all of this. So you need to take control, don't ask her out just because she wants to go out with you, ask her out because you want to get to know her. And do it on your own time schedule. You are right though, you should ask her out, if you don't know her that well, one casual date is worth it just to make a new friend. And if you do this with confidence her friends will all be attracted to you as well.
