You are helpless if you want to help him b/c he has to make that choice for himself. It seems that you are rather wrapped up in him and his problems; are you making them yours? It sounds like a relationship is not going to be healthy for either of you. Don't sacrifice your own mental health for someone else. Think about it: how can you save someone else from drowning if you can't swim? If you stay w/ him, it sounds like it will be very unhealthy for you, so how would you be in any position to help him? I don't know what his problems are, but as long as he is not dealing w/ them, he will keep hurting you and you deserve better. I broke up w/ a guy who thought he "loved me the first time he saw me," but it turned out that he was looking for someone to make him feel better. He was in a lot of pain, really depressed, and somewhat of an alcoholic. Basically, I told him that he needed to love himself before thinking he loved me and he needed help to deal w/ his issues. Although I was not mentally stable myself, it got worse when he threatened to kill himself in front of me. I got to a point during that time and realized if he did kill himself, there was nothing I could do & the only thing I could do was encourage him to get help. It was his decision, not mine. This was very unhealthy & I hope you don't have to go through that. Take care of yourself; that way, if he does get treatment, you will be able to help him recover. IF he makes the choice for himself. Peace and love
It sounds like your really caught up in him and his issues.There's not much you can do for a person who either does'nt see there's a problem or does'nt want help.There's way to many issues going on,way to much.He really needs help but only he can help himself.You cannot save him,you can only save yourself.It is soo much better to be alone than in a bad relationship.Lonelyness won't kill you and this is not your last chance at love.Sounds like you already realize hanging around him is an accident waiting to happen.Take care of yourself.Spend time with healthy people and supportive friends.You won't find someone who loves you and is sane and wonderful if you're not available.Encourage him to get better then run in the other direction for your own sanity and mental health.It's not selfish to take care of yourself.If you hang around crazy people you'll be crazy too.Sorry if this sounds harsh.It's been my expirience though.It takes time to change and alot of hard work.It never happens overnight and it takes real dedication.In alot of cases what you see is what you get.You deserve better don't be afraid to allow good things to happen.Make positive choices and more positive things will happen for you. Be well. Good luck, Keep us informed,..
ConfusedLittleOne, What happened to your post? Sorry if I took awhile but wanted to say I thought you were doing the right thing.You've gotta take care of yourself and why make things worse on you and him.Facing the inevitable and making choices that are healthy and going good places is what you want to do.It's never easy so hang in there.I wish you the best of luck.Hope things get better Write back cause I feel bad,lol,really! Joe,
I dated a girl, who had more problems then I have. I have bad OCD, but this girl had forms of pyscosis (spell), anerixic, suicidal, bipolar and had OCD. I cared about her and tried to help her, but her problems went way way passed me. It was a big mistake, the more I tried the more it turned into a disaster, and she went nuts from my efforts and made up something to get me in trouble.