I've been in this band for about 6 months now, mostly because I'm having trouble finding other musicians to play with. After this time, I've come come to conclusion that the music we play is not fulfilling enough for me to continue this band. The problem is, they CANNOT find another drummer. I feel pretty bad leaving the rest of the guys hanging, because they definitely dig what we do, but I don't think it would be fair to me to have to suffer through more time of doing something that I truly don't enjoy so that they can do their thing. Has anybody had experience in this department? Let me know if you guys have any suggestions.
Tell them that you will play with them until they find another drummer. Be straight up with them, i know its easier to say than do, but its the best thing. If your afraid that you will be with them for longer than you want, then set a limit. say, hey i have no problem playing with you guys for another couple months while you look for a new drummer. That way they know your going to leave, but your not leaving them without a drummer. Just my two cents.
Have you spoken up about the fact that if they dont alter their tunes to suit your taste that they will have to look for another drummer? Let them know and you may find that they are willing to be more open to stuff you want to play, which would seem to solve all your problems at once. Given that they cant find another drummer, they may give a little on the material being played! Telling them you are willing to keep playing till they find a replacement works sometimes, but can also lead to drunken fights if someone takes it as an insult. If you have pending gigs on the books, offer to stay thru the dates booked. Another option might be to get a side project together and go for the best of both worlds. No matter what your choice, you owe your bandmates enough to be honest with them about what gets played.
I want to quit mine too. Music is my life, my calling and my passion, where as for my band members its just a thing they do sometimes inbetween work. It pisses me off when we have a practice scheduled and no one shows because someone didnt say something. Then we play one shitty show and they think we are just done playing for life.. Not to mention all the music I write is totally fucked over when they play it. Luckely enough I'm getting into djing, as well as solo recording so I can make music on my own time, and do my own thing and then find another band as well. I think every band has fights and shit, but if you don't dig it just leave. It will probably be better then what I'm doing now. Hah. I'm in the same situation too. exact thing, I'm a drummer.
I need to find musicians like my self, who share the same taste and vision in music. Other wise the only way i can make music i will enjoy my self would be to record every instrument myself, which i can do, but lack the equipment. When ever i play i play to what i hear inside, and other people arent playing that, so its impossible for me to cope with that sort of mess.
Yeah man, I hear ya there. Its has a lot to do with their musical abilities, more than preferences. Im definitely gonna stick by em for now, because they are kinda friends and they cant be left hanging. I just hope they can find another drummer sometime soon :toetap: . Thanks for the suggestions.
now you know how side projects get started. Sometimes one band, or outlet is not enough to express the different voices that you can have. Being able to focus the energy needed to "launch" a band locally is very good, however, and at that point, you should be a "one band wo/man." Talk with them. If it is a democratic band, and all input is considered, then you have the right to say, "hey, we do too many lame covers. Could we start working up (this) to help create our own band-voice?" or whatever needs to change a bit for you. If the differences really are so much more, give a couple month's notice, written, with the exact list of gigs you are already committed to. You should still be in any rehearsals. Then stick to your timeline. At that point THEY didn't find a drummer, and it isn't your fault.
