in the middle of a breakup...

...and i need advice. Advice to maybe try and save our relationship or advice on dealing with the pain.

we've been going out for a little over four months. i asked him to the senior prom, we went and started going out that night. everything seemed to be perfect. but since the beginning my parents hated him and wanted me to find someone better...someone i deserved. but i wanted him and we've tried everything to keep my parents out of our business. at some points my parents went to drastic measures...like searching my room...reading my personal journals...barging in on a party to catch me smoking weed (which btw, they think i smoke because my bf does...but it's my decision to smoke and they will not see that)

he told me last night that he thinks its best we break up...even though theres nothing wrong with me...he just doesnt want to go through dealing with my parents. they hate him and they take it out on me by making me feel bad and by making me think my bf isn't good enough for me...they make me feel like shit about myself...which on one occasion led me to cutting myself because i was so mad at myself. i was made to believe that i fucked up our relationship from the very beginning, and thinking that tore me apart. and just recently, my brother heard from a very good friend of mine that my bf was bragging at a party to his friends about how he was using me and shit. i asked him about that...he said he wasnt saying bad things about me, he said he was talking to someone about maybe breaking up with me, apparently because of my parents

i dont know why he didnt tell me about breaking up until last night over the phone...he had just dropped me off from spending the night at his house. then that's when my mom talked to me and told me about the things she heard from my brother...the things he was saying about me. i called him after that and he denied saying bad things...then he brought up the breaking up thing. why didn't he tell me while i was with him? why did he have to do this over the phone? i told him that if he really wants to still be with me that we should try talking to my parents...but unfortunately they wont sit down and have a civilized conversation with us. he kept telling me that he wishes things were different and he wishes we could still be together...he says this and still doesnt want to try and work things out. Is he saying those things just to cover up for the fact that he plain doesn't want me anymore...and that he really is using me?

im so fucked up, and on the verge of crying every second...and i dont know really what to think. if i find out that he really isn't saying things about me and he still wants to work something out...im going to suggest taking a break. so then we can start things over once we both have jobs (which will be soon for me...i have an interview on saturday) i think that when we have jobs my parents will have a better perspective on us and finally be ok with me seeing him.

advice? comments? someone please tell me what they think about my story. actually i think i've posted about the troubles with my parents before...only the breaking up thing wasn't a part of it.

;_; ;_; ;_;

 

Why are your parents so against this guy? Have they been this way with any other boyfriends you may have had? Would your brother have any reason to lie to you?

Sorry to hit you with so many questions, but I think them kinda import. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time, and from your initial statements, I'd say taking a break would probably be a good idea since everything aside, you'd be wanting to take a break anyway. Get some time to yourself to sort this out... and a job is a wonderful way to start

 

ful mah...nice signature quote...


As far as this situation goes, you can't let your parents rule your lives. My mom was against me being with my boyfriend from the beginning, but that didn't stop us, and now...almost 2 years later...she's learned to accept it and I think is seeing him in a much better light. It caused a lot of distress between my mother and me, but in the end, I think she realizes that I've always done my own thing, and I'm not about to lose one of the best things that's happened to me because she disagrees. It's your life, and only you know what makes you happy.

Your boyfriend...it seems like he's taking the easy way out. He's using your parents as an excuse to not be with you, which fucking sucks. If he really wanted to be with you, he'd fight for it. I think perhaps you need to move on...I'm sorry...

 

well we broke up...it turns out he just doesnt want any relationship at all right now. we're still friends and really care about each other, but we do need time to ourselves...it just took me awhile to come to agree with myself...i just didnt want to have to leave him i guess, i may be a little selfish.

he came over to talk last night...we sorted out the whole story. he said he never used me or said anything bad about me and that there was nothing wrong with me that's making him wanna break up. i'm a little sad that it had to be like this...i thought he was the perfect guy for me. i still think he is, he has always been good to me. but overall i'm just fine...the good thing is that we're still friends...and hey, its possible we could get back together later on so if we're really meant to be he'll come back

thanks to anyone who cared to read my story and help out

 

Good Luck !