Can cheating actually be the right thing to do?

What if a couple has never nailed down the details of their relationship but assume that they are exclusive? Maybe they have not actually asked the other if they are having sex with someone else. Lets presume that the relationship is unequal because one half is much more attractive than the other. They feel that the other person owes them because of it and they are actually the one being cheated because of this miss match so they have sex with other people.Also let's say that the cheater in this case is well aware how important the they are to the other person but can't be monogamous. If the fool never finds out what harm has been done? They get someone that they couldn't get otherwise and are ignorant of the details.The participants of a relationship are hardly evenly matched, so is this aspect that important if it never drives the two apart? Are we shallow for not suspecting our lover is cheating on us?

 

It sounds like communication is the right thing to do. The couple needs to discuss where they stand in a relationship before one of them sleeps around. Its a situation where permission REALLY is better than forgiveness.

The attractiveness levels of the two parties are irrelevant. If the cheater feels they can do better, than they owe their current partner the rrespect of an adult breakup rather than being treated as a placeholder until something better comes along.

The fact the cheater is very important to the other person is not a reason to stay and cheat behind the person's back. This is not doing the other person favors.

This is just my 2 cents.

 

In response to the title, "no".

 

Honestly I am not aware of a relationship that is completely exclusive.There may be periods of monogamy but the real question is what percent under one hundred are people monogamous. I believe that I have not made my self explicitly clear.When I refer to cheating it is in both situations of being married and not married.If there isn't a marriage contract it seems that there is nothing wrong with dishonesty in contemporary pop culture. It has the same value as cheating on a quiz in class. The less binding the relationship the lesser the fidelity. What exactly are they being cheated of? Is it the sex and the number of of sexual partners that they could have had if they weren't committed to the other person? Or is it the relationship that they built within themselves that should have never existed, a waste of their emotions? What about the severity of the consequences to the monogamous half. It is possible that they will actually be better off if left ignorant of the facts. If we told our partners every thing we have done sexually in the past it could also dissolve the relationship. Is keeping this from them a marginalized form of cheating because the information could separate them?

 

Maybe you should stop hanging around swingers. If two people have fallen for eachother and are in love or whatever you want to call it, I don't see how they would want anyone else. And I have no nver encounterd a couple with an open relationship with other people. Cheating is a NO. Stop trying to justify your way into someones pants.

 

What a cruel thing to do, to enter into a relationship with someone and then feel that you are so much more attractive than him or her that you've got the right to skank your junk all over town. For one, no one is that attractive, and no one is that ugly. For two, if you just HAVE to believe some crap like that, find someone you think is just as attractive as you are. For three, arogance is nearer to self-hatred than it is to pride...maybe you've become involved with someone specifically because you enjoy feeling like the attractive one, but are still so full of self-loathing that you need the constant sense of approval that you get from flings.

The fool? The fool is the one throwing his or her life away for the belief that a good time is as or more important than honest emotional intimacy, and for the ridiculous assumption that beauty isn't extremely fleeting.

We all end up ugly on the outside. Pity the fools who are ugly inside.

 

just from reading the thread title. cheating is never the right thing to do.

 

The context is this. Have you ever known anyone that was being cheated on but didn't know? It seems that if they don't have the volition, motivation or concern themselves otherwise, it's best not to intervene. Maybe this is were the actual expression of "you can bring a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" came from. If you try to inform them they are belligerent and otherwise behave if you are attacking them. Then all they do is ask their partner who denies it and then tells them who said it. So you can expect a visit from the cheater afterward for your reward.I used the physical attractiveness miss match as a vague example. To be more exact and more unemotional I should have described it as leverage over the relationship. It could be intelligence, education family tree or anything but benevolence.As one of them was actually lucky to be in the relationship with any terms at all and they were hence being completely impractical, unreasonable and dishonest with themselves to expect the other to be honest with them. If people are dishonest with themselves I don't think that they deserve honesty from other people as well.They will be taken advantage of. Portraying the starter of this thread as a villain is funny because I don't even consider having a relationship with someone unless they are committed to put some distance in between their last one. The downside to this is I have trouble getting laid in a whorehouse. A cheater is a cheater. If they are willing to cheat with you they are capable to cheat on you as well. A figure I heard from the main stream media was that about fifty percent of the population stated that they had cheated on some one and I am interested in hearing the ration ale behind it.Most of the people I know can't pass up the opportunity of a different sex partner when it arises. The ration ale I get from them is usually that they don't want their living arrangement to change along with reasoning that is completely immature. I really don't think that they have intellectually progressed from the point of getting their first hard on or getting wet.Which leaves us with adults with the minds of children. But if its all about sex, than its not a intellectual thing anyway.

 

um. That makes no sense!

Anyway, the answer is still no. Even if someone appears to deserve something awful, it doesn't mean that any one person has the right to give that awful thing to them.

 

Can cheating actually be the right thing to do?

Sure, if you are the one cheating. Just ask someone that has cheated....they will justify the hell out of their infidelity.

For most people cheating is not okay and grounds for ending a relationship. As for exclusivity; in a relationship it is generally accepted that once people become a couple they are exclusive. Usually when it is okay to seek strange the couple has made it known to each other. At least that has been my experience/observations.

If all of your friends can't pass up the chance to have some strange, you may want to reconsider your friends. Sorry, but I ditch friends who cheat on their partner. It tends to put a person in a crappy position with the significant other and friends shouldn't do that to each other. JMO

 

If our lives aren't intertwined to the extent that our partner has the opportunity to engender with another the relationship that we are engaged in is impotent anyway.If you need time apart from your partner maybe you should just be apart. If we do not support the success or our relationships to the best of our abilities the implied rule proves to be true. If your partner has a need its going to be fore filled. Otherwise they will go on neglected Its related to Murphy's Law and it is ruled by physical possibilities.. There is no doubt that in this scenario the constituents are not purists. They may never care for someone as much as them selves ever.I will go ahead and be redundant to the conscious world. The society most of us live in is centered around economics and practicability. Honesty is not our unprecedented goal. It's in the same file under life with all the other things, but it isn't at the top of our filing system and definitely not the root. If there wasn't an advantage to the interacting of people we would all be hermits. Not everyone can afford a purists relationship. Once the resultant advantage no longer exists is when the relationship dissolves. We have a responsibility not only to are partner but also to ourselves in the continuation of a honest relationship. If cheating is used as some sort of diabolical tool for a person to build their ego from anyone else's misfortune it is of coarse wrong for both of those involved. If our first relationship broke up because of our partners beguiling ways shame on them. If our second or further relation broke up for the same reason shame on us. I fail to see how NONE of the blame is that of the cheated on and ALL is of the cheater. But I know.Cheating is always wrong and it doesn't matter who is keeping the score.