Sometimes i fell this RAGE...

I'm posting this cause i'm wondering if it's just me or something that's common.

Sometimes i look at the world around me, the people, the government, the culture, and i feel nothing but disgust. I feel like every other person has chosen to abandon their mind, that every system and service is there to make me incrementally weaker and more dependent.

Sometimes i want to punch the smiling bubbly idiot across from me, and keep punching until i'm too tired to swing again. Sometimes i like to litter in front of people with save the earth/trees/whales t-shirts on. I like to blow smoke, i would quit smoking ciggs if i didn't like the rush so much and yes, it actually does make people look cooler i dont care what PSA you parrot to me.

i drink sometimes a little more than i should, that when i'm acting as i normally feel i have something to blame. I hate small talk. I hate tv news anchors and i really hate police. i drive faster than i ever need to and i take corners a little to sharp. i have zero patience. And i get horny when i'm pissed off, doesn't matter what about. and i'm a bit of a misogynist, but i try not to let it show.

The thing is i don't do these things intentionally, or at least not consciously, i don't even really like these things about myself. but it's usually always there.

 

I do all of the above from time to time, except the littering.

That's just wrong.

 

Yeah, i know, but it's a little exciting cause they always start to think of something to say, take a good look at me, and then look the other way. makes me feel better for some reason.

 

I used to have a lot of anger, which I mostly took out on myself. I'd pick fights over the drop of a hat, and smiling bubbly people irritated me.

I've changed a lot though.

 

I feel that way a lot, Shane. I wouldn't say I feel rage, though. More like anger combined with sadness. I just think the overwhelming majority of people are stupid and are concerned only with themselves. That's why I am pretty much a loner. I really don't care to be around most people. It's hard enough to carry on a conversation with the average person.

 

Shane99X: Yea I feel rage a lot myself.

But channel the rage into something positive for you and you will have an incredible ability to get things done.

Works for me and I have a hell of a lot of rage.

 

sounds like you are completely unhappy with yourself mostly. I would try to work on that, and try to enjoy life while you are alive. Don't worry about what other people are doing

 

I agree with that completly. You will never, ever change people around you. If you don't like them all it's obviously on you to find a solution.

You can isolate yourself to some degree, but that's not going to make you any happier. I know someone who's agoraphobia has gotten to the stage where they never leave the house. Just wallow in anger and fear.

Some of this stuff you don't have to confront, but at some point you're going to have to stop getting frustrated with what other people are doing and lead your own life.

 

The thing is, people who walk around enraged all the time are actually the causes of the most misery and crimes in the world, even while they perceive themselves as the victims, or that they are above everyone else.

I would hope that you are smart enough not to become that person.

I used to have more anger than I have now, and thats due to facing things, growing up, and facing mortality. I still do get firey at times, but I like to maintain a healthy edge.

Rat, i am surprised you haven't killed yourself yet considering you spend so much time focusing on the problems and conspiracies in the world.

 

Sometimes the fact that so many people are content with being blissfully ignorant wells up extreme depression in me and other times I can't blame them. There's a certain amount of responsibility in realizing how fucked up things are.

 

Says who?

 

I'm just saying that it takes a toll on me mentally and physically.

 

oh

yeah i can agree with that.

 

The thing is, directing anger and disillusionment at random strangers does little to solve the cause of all these feelings. If you are pissed at the world, change it, don't hate it.

 

i dont know that i'm pissed at "the world". i'm just mostly pissed and it happens to bleed into a lot of things.

 

I've also learned that some people are content in their ignorance but some are still willing to listen.

 

You need to figure out what you're pissed at, and then maybe you can go about changing/accepting it. I was one of the angriest young men I knew. I realised that most of my anger was stemming from how I looked at things. As I've gorren older, I've learnt how to concentrate on the things that are in my control to change and not get angry with the people who don't share my passion for certain things, or who otherwise have their head in the sand. After all, it is their choice.

 

I feel like I'm too busy and have too many responsibilities and an overwhelming amount of paperwork and bureaucratic bullshit to push around day in and day out, and that it's sometimes hard to keep whatever happiness there is left by the end of the day.

I often feel as though the world is spinning too fast and I'm just trying to hang on as it orbits around the sun each day.

It's hard enough to worry about other people and all the problems in the world when you're just trying to make it through your day with your chin up and some happiness left over for tomorrow.

 

Thats the goal of the system, to beat you into submission.

Not submitting is as simple as not allowing work etc to get you down... your experiences are shared by the majority of working americans... its just the perspective put into daily life. Basically its not what you do, its how you do.

Not to say it is the only/correct way... but I go about my "boring, monotonous, dealing with idiots + horrible hours" job as an opportunity to meet new people and discuss things they/me wouldn't normally discuss... while undoubtedly hearing something I've yet to hear. I look forward to learning and teaching, the job just pays the bills

 

Fine post....

Its a conclusion that is very beneficial... a conclusion I can attribute to many good things in my life