You people are hilarious!

That's fucking sick. You should report your IP address to the FBI so they can look at your computer and find your vile coffee porn, pervert.

 

If you were 10 Jesus would take a look. Unfortunately you have them because of your sinful behaviour. But I have forgiven you already, peace be upon you.

 

Do you collect aborted fetuses and dry hump one each day of the week, Jesus?

pfft, and thanks for nothing about my roids, Jesus... Thanks a lot...

 

yeah, you probably shouldn't have added that second part, really was about a negative 4 on the funny scale...

 

These abortions sadden me. Such a waste...

Jesus isn't your GP.

 

This is a serious discussion.

 

does Jesus chafe himself with sand paper, then rub monkey shit over the reddened flesh while having tea with his grandmother?

 

Maternal or paternal grandmother?
Fibre1... I think you ought to switch to the cereal you're named after, considering what you seem to be full of.

 

Jesus is my wing man.

Help me get laid.

 

oooohhhh I just changed my maxi pad and I saw the virgin mary, jesus what does this mean?????

I think Jesus chafes himself with the teeth of the animal skulls he uses.. Lube it up!

 

I don't use maxi pads.

I let it smear everything it touches.

 

Okay... this has gotten ridiculous. It's like 80 degrees out.. I'm walking to Daily Queen...

 

Revelation 8:2 ¶And I saw the seven angels which stood before God; and to them were given seven trumpets. 3: And another angel came and stood at the altar, having a golden censer; and there was given unto him much incense, that he should offer it with the prayers of all saints upon the golden altar which was before the throne. 4: And the smoke of the incense, which came with the prayers of the saints, ascended up before God out of the angel's hand. 5: And the angel took the censer, and filled it with fire of the altar, and cast it into the earth: and there were voices, and thunderings, and lightnings, and an earthquake. 6: And the seven angels which had the seven trumpets prepared themselves to sound. 7: The first angel sounded, and there followed hail and fire mingled with blood, and they were cast upon the earth: and the third part of trees was burnt up, and all green grass was burnt up. 8: And the second angel sounded, and as it were a great mountain burning with fire was cast into the sea: and the third part of the sea became blood; 9: And the third part of the creatures which were in the sea, and had life, died; and the third part of the ships were destroyed. 10: And the third angel sounded, and there fell a great star from heaven, burning as it were a lamp, and it fell upon the third part of the rivers, and upon the fountains of waters; 11: And the name of the star is called Wormwood: and the third part of the waters became wormwood; and many men died of the waters, because they were made bitter. 12: And the fourth angel sounded, and the third part of the sun was smitten, and the third part of the moon, and the third part of the stars; so as the third part of them was darkened, and the day shone not for a third part of it, and the night likewise. 13: And I beheld, and heard an angel flying through the midst of heaven, saying with a loud voice, Woe, woe, woe, to the inhabiters of the earth by reason of the other voices of the trumpet of the three angels, which are yet to sound!



Revelation 9:1 ¶And the fifth angel sounded, and I saw a star fall from heaven unto the earth: and to him was given the key of the bottomless pit. 2: And he opened the bottomless pit; and there arose a smoke out of the pit, as the smoke of a great furnace; and the sun and the air were darkened by reason of the smoke of the pit. 3: And there came out of the smoke locusts upon the earth: and unto them was given power, as the scorpions of the earth have power. 4: And it was commanded them that they should not hurt the grass of the earth, neither any green thing, neither any tree; but only those men which have not the seal of God in their foreheads. 5: And to them it was given that they should not kill them, but that they should be tormented five months: and their torment was as the torment of a scorpion, when he striketh a man. 6: And in those days shall men seek death, and shall not find it; and shall desire to die, and death shall flee from them. 7: And the shapes of the locusts were like unto horses prepared unto battle; and on their heads were as it were crowns like gold, and their faces were as the faces of men. 8: And they had hair as the hair of women, and their teeth were as the teeth of lions. 9: And they had breastplates, as it were breastplates of iron; and the sound of their wings was as the sound of chariots of many horses running to battle. 10: And they had tails like unto scorpions, and there were stings in their tails: and their power was to hurt men five months. 11: And they had a king over them, which is the angel of the bottomless pit, whose name in the Hebrew tongue is Abaddon, but in the Greek tongue hath his name Apollyon. 12: One woe is past; and, behold, there come two woes more hereafter. 13: And the sixth angel sounded, and I heard a voice from the four horns of the golden altar which is before God, 14: Saying to the sixth angel which had the trumpet, Loose the four angels which are bound in the great river Euphrates. 15: And the four angels were loosed, which were prepared for an hour, and a day, and a month, and a year, for to slay the third part of men. 16: And the number of the army of the horsemen were two hundred thousand thousand: and I heard the number of them. 17: And thus I saw the horses in the vision, and them that sat on them, having breastplates of fire, and of jacinth, and brimstone: and the heads of the horses were as the heads of lions; and out of their mouths issued fire and smoke and brimstone. 18: By these three was the third part of men killed, by the fire, and by the smoke, and by the brimstone, which issued out of their mouths. 19: For their power is in their mouth, and in their tails: for their tails were like unto serpents, and had heads, and with them they do hurt. 20: And the rest of the men which were not killed by these plagues yet repented not of the works of their hands, that they should not worship devils, and idols of gold, and silver, and brass, and stone, and of wood: which neither can see, nor hear, nor walk: 21: Neither repented they of their murders, nor of their sorceries, nor of their fornication, nor of their thefts. 11:15 And the seventh angel sounded; and there were great voices in heaven, saying, The kingdoms of this world are become the kingdoms of our Lord, and of his Christ; and he shall reign for ever and ever.

 

A female condom is a device that is used during sexual intercourse. Invented by Danish MD Lasse Hessel, it is worn internally by the receptive partner and physically blocks ejaculated semen from entering that person's body. Condoms are used to prevent pregnancy and transmission of sexually transmitted infections (STIs—such as gonorrhea, syphilis, and HIV). Female condoms have been available now for over 15 years.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_condom

 

The unrated version, available in the U.S. and mainland Europe, running 156 minutes (NTSC) and 150 minutes (PAL). This is the most widely seen cut of the film. It enjoyed a limited, albeit highly profitable, run in the American cinemas. This version contained significant explicit sexual and violent content, including sex orgies, masturbation, fellatio, cunnilingus, anal fisting, male and female homosexuality, cross-dressing and transvestism, sibling incest, rape, male and female urination as well as scenes of decapitation of prisoners using a lawn-mower-type device (which is unlikely to have actually existed), infanticide, implied fratricide, penile castration and testicle castration.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caligula_(film)

 

Revelation 2.6 Jesus ate a 400 pound man and he told the man before he ate him that he will eat him and then he did in fact eat him. And then Jesus said, wow, I ate him.

Revelation 2.7 Jesus pooped weighed 400 pounds, it fed children and they clapped and laughed. He said blessed be who touched upon my feces, you are now considered blessed and holy. Dance, Dance until you can dance no longer. I like cheese.

 

1944 - World War II: U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt announces the 6th War Loan Drive, aimed at selling $14 billion USD in war bonds to help pay for the war effort.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/November_19

 

WTF are you on about?

Emperor Caligula was sexxing his mother. Who he then threw into the water and tried to drown her. What is your point?

 

:huh: