Just wondering about this re another issue: it seems like most bisexuals I have known have "ended up" in heterosexual relationships (i.e. long-term relationships with people of the opposite sex) rather than homosexual ones, tending more towards casual sex or short-term relationships with their own sex. I'm wondering whether this reflects people's experience, of their own relationships and of others'; how many of you have ended up in long term same-sex relationships rather than heterosexual ones?
i have not yet been in a lesbian relationship...nor a very serious hetero one, but i imagin myself in quite the opposite situation. I can imagine myself in a longterm relationship with a woman...maybe have a family. i don't consider myself strictly bisexual, but i do believe that bisexuals do not ALWAYS gravitate toward longterm, hetero relationships.
I'd like to think the same about men, if only because I have kind of a thing for bi guys, but I've not seen much evidence.
haha... i'm a lesbian who has somehow fallen into a long term (so far) relationship with a man... so where does that put me lol! i think as far as long term relationships go, it's all about the vibe with someone... the attraction, the fire of souls meeting, and the rate of growth together. but that's generally speaking. i do think it is easier for bisexuals to "end up" in hetero relationships if they are fairly close to a 50/50 or more towards hetero, simply because it's so much easier in society the way it stands today. it's easier to go with the flow and get caught up in that energy of two people, preferably a man and a woman, pairing up for the rest of their lives. which is total bullshit in my opinion, but there you go... the opinion of a polyamorous lesbian in a potentially long term open relationship with a man. lol!
Hey Treehugger, glad to hear u identify as Lesbian, even tho ur in a het relationship right now. I believe in ppl forming their own label instead of some generic pigeonhole that the consensus puts us in. Explains why I found myself in bed with a staunch Lesbian friend when I was younger. I was in a 5-year long term with another guy and an 18 year long term with a woman. I consider myself bi, but gay by default because I can get guys in bed with no effort (sometimes takes effort to keep them out). Actually, I think I may be more turned on by guys than girls any more, but depends on the guy or girl I'm seeing at the moment. I like the archaic term ambisexual because I am perhaps ambiguous about it.
Technically speaking, I guess you could call me bisexual. The only thing I am attracted to in the same sex is the sex organ. Especially if it's big. Even better if it's fucking huge. However, I could never have anything more than a physical relationship with a man. I could never do all those "other" things I do while in a relationship with someone of the opposite sex. Watching a movie together while cuddling (unless it's a porno), pretending to care about our anniversaries, listening to her bitch about her best friend the back-stabber. Joking aside, I guess what I'm saying is I could never love or have feelings for a man. It's nothing that I think is wrong or immoral, I just don't think I'm equipped to feel that like I do for a woman.
I used to think I only wanted sex from guys and naturally end up with a woman. After being with a guy I really liked that changed my mind. I'm not really sure what sex I'll end up with and I don't really care much. Sometimes I think a guy sometimes I think girl. Really it's who the person is and how you feel about each other that matters.
You could always look for a really feminine dude with a huge dong. Or a woman with massive protruding labia?
i can't really see myself in any kind of relationship as of yet, but i feel it would be incorrect to state whether it is a man or a woman i would see myself. At this moment if I had to think about it I would probably connect more with a woman, because although I am attracted to them I find it hard to connect to men
well, i've really struggled with the self labeling thing a lot. because i AM lesbian. i mean... jrnyman is the only guy i've ever EVER gotten hot over! and most likely he'll be the only one! i tried on the bisexual label for a while, because i hate how LESBIAN really cuts jrny out of the picture. but the thing is, i'm not bisexual. i don't like guys. i just like jrnyman, lol! and we have an amazing relationship, and the polyamorous freedom to be who i am and be with who i'm attracted to, all the while getting to live my life alongside someone i really care about, even if he doesn't fit my lesbian lable... well, if we "end up" at an old age, still looking at each other and wanting to jump each other, i'll be happy about that. if we don't, and we go our separate ways, that's fine too. i really feel like i've fallen into paradise (ps. the roses still have thorns here... but somehow it's okay) with this situation. i think it's cool, shale, how you have lived a life of such open sexuality whether it's hetero or homo or somewhere in between. i find so few people, ESPECIALLY of your generation, who actually feel the way you do, or are even accepting of the many shades of the spectrum of sexuality. so yeah.. you rock!
Although I'm bisexual, I'm also I'm married (my wife is also BISEXUAL), and the majority of my romantic relationships have been with women... I have had one SERIOUS GAY RELATIONSHIP. To be completely honest, that one serious GAY RELATIONSHIP was one of the best, satisfying and fulfilling romantic relationships I've EVER had. My wife (who's also bisexual) and I have had MANY discussions about the possibility opening our marriage to meet BOTH of our needs/desires. We've had conversations about trying a POLY RELATIONSHIP with another MAN, because my wife WOULDN'T be able to handle me being romantically/sexually involved with another woman, as she easily gets jealous if she senses even the slightest bit of friendliness/flirtation between me and ANY woman. She's even VERY guarded when it comes to my FRIENDSHIPS with females. However, she DOESN'T have that same jealousy, feel "threatened", or need to be "on guard" when it comes to my FRIENDSHIPS with other men, despite the fact that we have a few mutual friendships with a couple of OPENLY gay men... Including one who "boldly" flirts with me regularly, even in front of my wife. We've even had MANY SERIOUS conversations about the VERY REAL idea of going (at leat trying) with an OPEN MARRIAGE with "A TWIST". The "twist" would be that BOTH of us would only be allowed persue outside RELATIONSHIPS with members of the same-sex, and we'd BOTH have to APPROVE of each other's outside partners... Meaning my wife would be allowed to persue/have a LESBIAN relationship(s)with other WOMEN, and I'd be able to persue/have a GAY relationship(s) with other MEN. One of my fantasies (not necessarily a sexual fantasy... So maybe it's more like a "dream") is to go on a "DOUBLE DATE" with my wife... A double date where my "date" would be ANOTHER GUY, and my wife's "date" would be a ANOTHER WOMAN. If there was OPEN flirting, kissing ang groping in front of each other that led to us ALL returning back to OUR place... Where my wife would end up having LESBIAN sex, and I'd end up having GAY sex - in the SAME ROOM - AT THE SAME TIME, I think that would be an AWESOME thing to experience
