I'm ill and feeling gloomy, has anyone got any good jokes to share? I'll start with my two favourites: 'a man walked into a shop and asked for an innuendo, so the shop keeper gave him one' 'a man went to the doctors and told him "i think my wifes dead" the doctor asked "what makes you think that sir" the man replied "well the sex is the same but the ironings piling up" . . . . . . DUMDUMCHEEE! anymore??
Wish i could cheer you up but im so rubbish at jokes...im one of those people who just forgets the ending or tells it all wrong
2 drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff Baboom tsch And I apologise for the fact I've told you all that 20 times before
There were 5 blokes in an Audi Quattro, they're driving around Ireland when they get stopped at a road block. The policeman says did you know it's illigal to have 5 people in your car, quattro means 4, the driver says thats rubbish, you can have 5 in the car. The driver then produced his car and insurance doccuments stating that the car can carry 5 people. The policeman says, you cant fool me, quatro means for so I'm gonna have to arrest you for having 5 in the car. The driver gets annoyed and asks to speak to someone with more brains like his superior. The policeman says, he cant come, he's too busy dealing with 2 blokes in a Fiat Uno
A man walks into a resteraunt with a panda. They eat thier meal then the panda pulls out a gun and shoots his friend. The waiter quickly rushs up and before he can say anything the panda passes him a dictionary. PANDA: Eats shoots and leaves. Pretty poor eh?
What do pirates drive around in? a cARR!! What do pirates get when they have stitches? a scARR! What is Scurvy? Lack of fruits and vegetables causing vitamin c deficiency. ARR!!
How do pirates get up in the morning? With an alARRm! Where do pirates grow crops? On a fARRm! Where do pirates keep there cows? In a bARRn! This joke just keeps going and going!!!
