Plain and simple My girlfriend and i have been seeing eachother for a year now and everything has been going awesome. and by awesome i mean: We would make love everychace we got and you could sence the love in the air. Recently she tells me that she is never having sex again, all because this public speaker came to her schoool and preached the "joys" of remaining celebet and "saving" yourself for the person you marry. I really want to tell her that its a little late to save yourself, but im not that insencitive. What i think sparked this is a number of things. Mainly i recently found out that i have been posted to Kandaher Afganestan, I dont know if she can handle that or if she is holding it inside. The biggest thing that confuses me is recently We had this confesation about Love and making love are big parts to a relationship. I felt that Sex is huge in a relationship she thinks otherwise. And then she tells me shes never having sex agian See what im saying? I love this girl But i dont know what to do now I would like to hear all advice good and bad Thank you
can you live without ever having sex again? if not, you have 2 major choices: 1. have a long term affare on the side. 2. get a new girlfriend. i agree with you on your hunch, that something more is going on here, in your relationship with this woman. from what your saying here, this seems like some sort of high stakes psychological game she is playing with you, and one or both of you will get hurt very, very, badly in the end.
i agree there's sth in the air: she may have somebody else to make sex with. but there's another point i can think of. have you ever talked about marriage? she's said she would like to 'save herself' to sb she will be married to. if she don't feel it will be you, being you i would feel endangered. tell her you love her, you want to be with her forever, ask wether she feels the same. make her feel save, that you won't leave you (or you don't intend to in closest future). maybe she feels you don't treat her right, maybe she think you don't really love her? tell her you respect her without having sex with her, but tell her also that you love her and you feel bad that she thinks it isn't you with whom she'll share the future.
She could be missing her more innocent days. I have known a few women that became "born again virgins" after some lecture or speech they heard. No idea what is going on in her head, so it is hard to give much advice. Did she know you were being stationed overseas before or after her declaration of celibacy? That might have something to do with it. If you are leaving soon then maybe you can ride out her "no sex" phase. Yeah, no sex would suck, but so would breaking up before you head overseas. I would talk to her, if it was me. Ask her why. Maybe she thought she was getting too kinky and felt guilty about it (trust me it happens). Tell her that you are trying to understand her choice, but are confused by it after your conversation about the importance of sex in a relationship. You make her sound pretty wonderful (except sex issue) so she is worth the effort to try to work through this. So are you. It may take some time and patience, but all good relationships do.
this is a common problem in sexually active women between 16 and 30. It is a case where they think they have thrown it all away. They now believe that sex is somthing more sacred, therefore they decide to become celibate. My best advice would be to talk about it. Don't try and pressure her it won't help. But talk about her decision. The fact is though that if she doesn't want sex then don't keep trying. But I bet you, one day you'll be fooling around or making out and she'll just go for it again.
um, tell her it's not gonna work without the sex... that it's a basic requirement of life, and either she lets you get a fuckbuddy or something, or you dump her sorry ass
thanks everyone for the great advice, I talked to her and referenced what some of you brought up i.e ------It is a case where they think they have thrown it all away. They now believe that sex is something more sacred,------ that stuck a pretty deep chord with her, i explained to her that her holding out is like me doing the same and i really didn't see me ever going down that road and more so not with with her. she responded pretty positively to that and well Cubic Lemmings what right once again and she "just" went for it. Thanks again everyone and thanks to hip forums for having a place where people can feel comfortable talking about this to complete strangers.
