but when I feel loved, I want to drown in it. Like I'm starving for affection, approval, acceptance. I get insecure, and I don't like living in constant fear that the person that loves me will abandon me. I don't like this, and have been working very hard to change the behaviours, the things that lead to these behaviours..the thought processes, trying to directly deal with the core issues, but I get so tired of losing the ones I love, and that love me. I don't trust psychologists or psychiatrists, (the ones in this area are predisposed to putting you on drugs than finding the root of the problem) great, now I sound pathetic too. ugh.
To get over that you have to truly feel okay with yourself.... love yourself enough that you don't NEED anybody else because you have yourself.... Blah blah...it's true but easier said then done but it's the only way to get rid of that...
They say that learning to love yourself is the Greatest Love of all (?!) Sometimes it's easy to get over stressed on the urgency of companionship but that just makes life ... un-enjoyable Be decisive, be true to your beliefs and be yourself. Take it easy in the things you do, and Love will find a way < Peace + Love ~ Save the Planet > +
(nods) Loving myself is the hard part. I'm having to rediscover myself, and that's brought up a whole mess of problems. Oh well, nothing to do but either hide from it or deal with it, and I don't want to hide.
i get what you're saying born25. i'm on a pretty hardcore journey to self realization lately too, and it's not easy. but loving yourself and others enough to let people go, and know that it's really best for everyone to follow their own path is about the only way you CAN ever stick around with the ones you love. because to do it any other way is to hold on, and smother people, and your own true self. rediscovery of your true soul is really tough. it involves seeing parts of yourself you really don't want to see and forgiving pieces you thought you'd never look at. it does suck a big one. lots of hugs to you... you're not alone in the journey!
Thanks...the words from everybody helps. NTH, thanks for letting me know I'm not alone...I have reason to believe the woman I love is going through the same thing. I was, for a long time, very very much in touch with myself, and I've spent the last 15 years 'not' being....I've got some work to do, and the people here are more supportive than my own family, and I have very few people I can call friends right now....so those of you that've commented have definitely helped me feel, at least a bit, like a person. NTH, man to woman question here....assume that myself and my love of 2 years are going through the same kind of reinvention, after trying to drown ourselves in each other for so long, do you think it's possible to build a healthier relationship out of that, or would it be more likely to have to scrap the lot and walk away?
Good for you Born25, dealing with your issues. Hope everything works out well for you. Only time will tell about your relationship. I used to be very insecure and was afraid of being abandoned by my other half, insignificant other, whatever. After 10 years of being with him, I wish he would abandon me.
Thanks BB, I came to a realization about making her feel safer the longer things take right now, and the safer she feels..(shrugs) I'm glad for all the of the support I've gotten from the community here....
