competing with an older man .......

Man this woman has me spinning all around!!!!

this is really long, but i need some help and advice....

we both left our boyfriends for each other and now i think this older guy is trying to steal her....

so a little background first

there was this crazy night and a "whole foods tour bus" and herbal extracts that led to as close to an orgy as your can get without the sex... basically a 6 person makeout/groping session.... i was there, my lady was there, the older guy was there, and a guy that i kind of liked was there.....

this was the first time my lady and I realized that we both felt the same way and after this surreal experience happened, the older guy started trying to get close to her

at first i just thought it was really cute and she told me that he didn't mean anything to her, so i really didn't mind at all that he was totally in love with her (i mean i don't blame him, so am i!!!)

Then she told me that he asked her to go to Austria with him this summer....she said no of course but that is when i started to get really upset with this whole situation.... how am I supposed to compete with this 35 year old man? He keeps spreading all this bullshit on her and I think he really just wants to get in her pants.........

after I found this out, i just decided to cool it and do my own thing for a while..... I made out with a few random guys (that meant nothing) and I told her about them and she said she was happy that I was finally free and blah blah blah

so a week later we went out on that amazing first date that I wrote about and she told me that she came out to her parents (whom I had met the week before) and she told them about me and she had also told all of her friends about me.

then 4 days later she told me that she kissed the older guy.... i was so upset and hurt but tried not to show it because we aren't in a committed relationship.....but i haven't even gotten to really kiss her aside from the bus orgy especially since she still lives with her ex(complicated i know!) and I just can't even believe she hooked up with that guy especially since she has come out to so many people and told them about me...... she then tried to justify it and say that I was making out with other guys too....but i know that this older man actually means something because he has been trying to get in her pants for like 2 months..... I just feel like I am really being toyed with and it has been fucking with me for the past week....and now I might have really fucked things up because the night after she told me this I was really depressed and I got really drunk and ignored her and then she saw me hooking up with this guy and at the time i didn't care because I was upset with her, but now I am really worried...

i know she isn't mad at me, but i think that both of our perceptions of each other are fucked up now

and I really feel like i am in competition with a 35 year old man..... I am an 18 year old girl........ this just feels so wrong.....I am going to see her tomorrow before she leaves for Boston for the summer, I don't know what to say or do

 

Just be honest. Be honest about everything and, hopefully, she will, too. If you're serious about her then be serious.

Don't get drunk, don't ignore her and don't hook up with any guys. If you want her, then show her.