Voted Class Clown, now I can't even talk to my girlfriend

She is not the girl for me. I have to deal with her, and, I can't take it, anymore. The sad part about is that when I was her age, I had been to a college, a university, through a coma, and, was about to attend a year's worth of community college. She is learning disabled and has had her teacher's do her work, all her life. A.D.D., A.D.H.D., E.D.D., and, she mentioned a few more disorders. She has no desire to further her life, not to mention a career. She won't even look for a job.

I've been with her for a year and a half. I'm thirty-three and my life was robbed at 19. She'll be 21 in a week and a half. How much more do I have to take this before things change? I know that I will be happy, with anybody, once I can get medicine to take my pain away and straighten out my head, the painless hip, arm, and, leg, plus straighten my vision and deaden my tinnitus.

I'm more screwed up than you think. I didn't mean to mention my problems.

 

Just tell her what you feel...

ps. If you don't mind my asking, where you in an accident or what caused all your psychical suffering?

 

It's like talking to a brick wall. She can't see what's not there. She can't even imagine it. She won't even imagine it. Using her words, "What do I need to learn that for?"

I have been in two life-changing car-accidents. I've totalled five vehicles, but, the first one, I went into a coma. Eight years later, a Chevy Venture Van left an imprint of my body on my driver's-side door. I feel pain on my left side, and, slowness on my right, because I came out of (the coma) paralyzed on my right side (I've worked back mobility, through rehabilitation, though my fine motor skills are weakened). I won't even play my guitar, anymore, because my left-side bothers me. I am right-handed.

With that in mind, words don't come out of my mouth exactly the way I want them to, every time. All of my symptoms are eased with one-hit of cannabis, with amazing, miraculous results.

Also, she can't understand my feelings.

 

I don't envy your situation. She sounds like a real winner...

Anyways, I all about speech issues. I've have my fair share of concussions, and now have a mild stutter, and more often than not I slur my speech.

 

That's funny, because I've always spoke very fast, and mumbled. During rehabilitation from the coma, I took speech classes and slowed down.

I left a six-year relationship to go live with this girl, 1,000 miles away, and, I never saw a picture of her.

I guess, that's what a coma does to you.

 

She's only 20, dude, what do you expect? You want someone to act 30, you should date someone closer to your age. She'll grow up in due time, but damn...she's just a kid. Break up with her so that she can continue to be a kid and you can find someone who's mature enough to suit your needs. It's not fair to expect a 20/21 year old to become a fully responsible adult when all of their peers are busy fucking off and getting drunk. I'm 21, I made the decision on my own to pass up partying for a full-time job so that I can be fully self-reliant, but I can completely understand why someone wouldn't want to make the same choice. If she's the same way when she's 25 or so, then you can bitch. Until then, deal with the fact that you've got a humongous age difference between the two of you and yeah, she's gonna be a little immature for awhile.

 

I expected more from a girl who had already been married for a year and a half.

Thanks for your answer.

 

Marriage doesn't mean maturity. Especially not a marriage that only lasted for a year and a half. :tongue:

 

Well, you're right. She wasn't married when we met, online- playing spades-, I didn't talk to her for two years, and, then all of us sudden, she popped up, saw my webcam, and, then called me. We talked for four months, while I was living with my ex-girlfriend (we still lived together for a year, after we broke up), and, finally I gave in to change my life.

She was still married when we started speaking, again, but, her husband had went to jail. I fell in love with her voice. I wanted to love somebody, so I chose her because I saw a "damsel in distress".

She has worked for nine months and quit, from McDonald's. A neighbor "forced" her into going down to the oceanfront and she got a job at an amusement park. She was fired for that after three weeks, but, she was the only American working for a guy who hired Russians, et al, because he only had to pay them 50 cents-a-day for overtime (as opposed to time-and-a-half).

Whatever happens happens. God has already ruled my life.

 

Exactly...

If you are unhappy and annoyed how about breaking it off...People do have different lives and because she is going a different path then you would like for her too doesn't mean she is doing anything really wrong besides being 20... If you are unhappy and so forth then you should just leave I guess...

 

I can't. I brought her 1,000 miles back to where I live. With a dog.

She's says that she would leave, if I found someone else, because she thinks that she is worthless. She knows that, even if she found a job, she could never afford to help me stay pain-free.

I am, almost, 1,000 miles away from my hometown, and, relatively know no one, except her. That's why I left to get her, in the first place. It's hard for a T.B.I. survivor to get out there and meet people.

Thank you, to everyone. Each post has made me feel a little better.

 

This may sound a bit rude of me, so forgive me, but why does she have to help you stay pain-free, sounds like she feels bad or has a low self-esteem by her saying she feels worthless.. I mean do you two even like each other, I really don't understand, I tried reading this but again, I don't really understand.. Don't mean to come off rude or anything but it really doesn't even sound like you two even like each other...Can't you just shift into friends and be roommates...

 

You don't sound rude.

I told my ex- that I wanted to make a difference in someone's life. The girl I'm with, now, was getting into meth. She was walking the streets, late at night. She said that the neighbors always stared in the windows (may have been a meth delusion). She'd babysit at a 25 year-old girl's house, and stay from Thursday/Friday to Sunday.

She's honest, and has told me everything. I know things that know one else knows (and I knew it before I met her). If it was a mistake for me to be with her, at least I've seen her clean up her act. My overwhelming pain passes the time. It gets me frustrated when she can't understand me or read between the lines.

 

She cooked meat, in a crockpot, made some corn, gave it to me, then sat there. Did I mention that she spent an extra year in high school, taking a lot of cooking classes, so they gave her a chef's certificate?

She won't look for work in a kitchen, so that's a wasted bonus (for everyone else, but, me).

 

I had some sense knocked into me, a few days ago, and, I took two hits of cannabis, now I'm cured of all my ailments. When I swam into the concrete pool-wall, due to my injuries causing my arms to be sunk underwater, while doing the forestroke (or, whatever it's called), instead of the proper posture (where you'd hit the wall with your hand, no matter what). It was a lapse in my system due to the absence of the only medicine that has been opted out of my doctors' offerings, due to state law.

Does everyone else have a knot on the back of their head, near the base of their skull, the size of a nickel, about a half-inch deep?

Man, that's a messed up post. Sorry.

 

Am I trippin or is this thread really happening?

 

To me, L.S.D. doesn't produce hallucinations, like it used to. I guess, you're the one who's tripping, nirmalamaya.

This thread is really happening, though. If anyone will just drive me into the ground, that'd be nice.