Do nice guys finish last?

Do nice guys finish last? This question is asked primarily of the females of www.hipforums.com, but I invite anyone to respond. First of all, we should acknowledge that in sexual selection what one is, is at least important as what one does, and the way one behaves. With that in mind, ladies please consider a choice between two males of comparable looks, age, and status. Would you prefer the one who is polite, helpful, and a little bit shy, or the one who is cocky, self confident, and slightly on the rude side? Why would you make this choice?

Gentlemen: what do you think? Have you ever been rejected on behalf of a jerk? Have you ever been chosen instead of a nice guy?

 

i have a question to add on to that also as i have been rejected on the fact that i was " just to nice" whats with that?

 

k.

Maybe saying you were too nice, was a cop out.
Maybe it was to save your feelings.
Who knows what goes through womens minds?

I don't think nice guys finish last.
They just feel worse when they are rejected.
Bad boys don't give a fuck.

Sadly I'm a mixture of the two.
So I am screwed.

 

I think that the main problem facing "Nice guys" is that they generally have been taught from childhood that if a woman isn't clearly signalling that she wants you then you shouldn't bother her, so when failing to see any clear signals that it's Ok to take the next step (like say, kissing her) Nice Guys fall back and then some "Bad boy" who doesn't care about what the woman thinks comes along and just sweeps her off her feet.

I suppose you could say a lot of Nice Guys just don't get that what they've been taught about how to behave toward women isn't true, a lot of women say they want nice guys but what they want is a nice guy who will also sweep them off their feet and take command of the situation, and when the nice guy doesn't take charge then she'll go with the guy who does.

(Please note that this is a generalization based on my observations of people in the bar scene here in Sweden, your mileage may vary and in no way do I claim to hold the definite truth that applies to all people)

 

Aww, that was such a nice thing to say.

 

I think part of the answer was expressed by W. B. Yeats when he opined in 'Vacilliation,' "All women dote upon an idle man
Although their children need a rich estate;"
which explains the common feeling that nice guys come in last. There is nice and then there is too nice. The nice guy will make advances, if not accepted will respect her wishes. The too nice guy won't even advance. The former has delightful times awaiting him - though not necessarily leading to intercourse (hand and mouth do nicely.) The latter wanks in secret from 12 to 80 unless shaken from his hiding by a sympathetic woman, who may herself discover she has unearthed a treasure.

 

If I act like an asshole to girls, in terms of paying little attention to them, they go after me harder. If I talk to them every day, they don't appreciate my company as much as if they have to work for it, maybe it's a matter of satisfaction?

I've been working on trying to act like more of an asshole (its working!!) because I act so servile and non-combative to people that they think that I'm lower than them, and walk all over me. For the guy-girl thing, I think it's like this: to be completely nice is to put yourself lower than others, and because attraction is related to worth (in terms of finding the best possible mate), a woman seeing a man who will do anything for her (not pertaining to those in married/mutual love relationships) assumes that he has low self-esteem. To see someone with low self-esteem is to see someone who has been largely trampled upon by society, and if someone has not been deemed acceptable by society as a whole, their mating value is probably pretty low. There's a lot to be said about having self-confidence.

 

Yes, nice guys finish last.

 

Yep thats right on the money in my opinion!

 

I should also say that i was one of those women who 'thought' she was fatally attracted to those cocky types. But my new boyfriend isn't like that at all. He is in fact very, very nice and such a gentleman. He wanted to kiss me from our first date and made himself available but it wasn't untill i held my face dangerously close to his that he kissed me. And strangley i am ok with that, its exciting in a way to hold off for a little bit. We are way past that now though lol..i digress.. He pays me loads of attention and is very thoughtful. He is also nearly 6 ft tall and 100 + kilos of pure hunkalicious muscle with dreamiest blue eyes lol but ya know..

 

I bet he has a small penis, but, ofcourse knows what to do with it.

 

Yes nice guys finish last. Girls like guys that treat them like shit.
The best way to keep a women is to go home, and punch them in the mouth.

 

Which is exactly why the Irish are so pimp, and pump out loads of kids.

(jm )

 

That and their outdated religous beliefs...damn those Roman Catholics.

 

I like nice guys alot. Shyness doesn't bother me one bit. I think it is really cute when a guy is shy. I would want a guy who is a gentleman rather then a guy who is a complete jerk. Nice guys are usually their to hold you when you cry.

 

Despite what women sometimes say, nice guys (almost) invariably finish last. This is partially because they tend to never get in the door (being too shy to make themselves noticed). Then, when they do manage to get in the door, they usually get too attached and/or emotional, causing them to be perceived as feminine then subsequently dumped for someone lower maintenance. Personally, I find that the best route to take (if you'd like to keep your self-respect), is to be as blunt and straight-forward as you can convince yourself to be, whilst still being polite and respectful.

And just so the women know, REALLY nice guys ALWAYS finish last, because a really nice guy feels it is his civic duty to do so.

 

All of girls say (and many are telling the truth) that they like nice guys, but for some reason, the bad boy thing just attracts them. It sucks for us nice guys, but we do what we can. I mean, if I can just become good friends with a girl, that's ok with me. I'm not looking for a relationship. It'd be cool to have one, but 'beggars can't be choosers' (KH reference). To finish the question, nice guys do usually finish last, but sometimes they over come it.

 

I think nice guys finish last (almost all the time), mostly because I am a nice guy myself.

Also I would like to point out the girls only like the bad boys for so long, and the majority don't end up marrying them.

 

^^ So true..

 

I think it really depends on the girl. Some girls like being bullied, treated like shit, and stepped on. Others are aware of their worth.

For me, I always liked the sweet boys who had a bit of a bite when necessary. And, for the record, temperment and personality do not always carry over to the bedroom. My boyfriend is the sweetest boy you could ever meet - he'll stand up for himself and others if needed, mind - but he likes a bit of force under the sheets.

A side note: Not all nice guys are clingy and shy. Not all assholes are distant and rowdy. Why don't we put an end to the stereotyping and judge individuals, not labels? I mean, I've got piercings and tattoos, does that make me a degenerate? I'd like to think I'm a decent person who tries to be nice (everyone has their dick moments, let's admit).