...just because you survived something??? A lot of people would say i have a great life. I have a job, very succesfull career for someone who is 22, i finished my college, have lot of friends that i can trust... But i'm only happy when i work. I can't sleep because my mind is overloaded. Sometimes i don't sleep for more than a week. In past two years i started to get along with that. But in a last few days, things got worse. I can only sleep if i'm drunk, stoned or something like that. Only my best friends knows the truth... Back in 2001, we had an accident. All the others were happy for being alive. I was indifferent then. Now i'm sorry for being alive. I'm slowly starting to hate everything about my life. I know this sounds pathetic, but this is who i am...
Everyone goes through periods like that in their lives. You just have to keep on trudging until you get past it. It seems, from my own experiences, that it happened a lot more to me when I was younger. Things seem to settle down and fall into place as you grow older.
i'm so sorry to hear that, why is it that your mind is overloaded? and why do you think you're only happy when you work? i pray you can find peace. jaz
Yeah... I'm like that a lot... sometimes I just have to get over or just deal with things like that... but other times... I can't. It's hard. Very hard. I'm going through it right now.
A lot of people say I have no life. I have no job, no career, dropped out of several schools, colleges and such yet I am happy. Maybe you should try that too.
i tought of that too. But that would be quiting. And i hate quiting. I could kill myself but that is quiting too... My life is like this because i don't want to quit some things...
That's also what I've been thinking about doing. I've had people talk me out of it. Then they tell me to just quit doing what I do, run away, and hit the road.
I tried... You know what he said... You could use some free time. And then i use some free time and become completely nervous... Even worse... Never trust doctors... I only talk to friends and forum people...
Olhippie is right. I still struggle with a few issues however as I get older those issues are getting easier to deal with. I have no problem reaching out for help either. I have two children to think about. They need me healthy for them. I need me healthy for me. Your throwing yourself into your work to keep your mind off your free "mind" time. That's understandable to some degree however by the sounds of it I get the impression your tired of that routine? How about finding someone to talk to. It doesn't mean your weak. It means your ready for something different in your life. I commend you for that. If you would like I can pm you with a few of the things that I did/still do that help/helped me. I am sorry about your accident. Learning how to forgive yourself for what had happened will help you be able to find some happiness in your life. It might take some work on your part (maybe even talk to your best friend about this) however you deserve to be happy. You were not meant to survive that accident to spend the rest of your life beating yourself up over it. My prayers are with you.
Never feel guilty for being a survivor. There is a reason and a purpose for you to live for. You sound as though you might be a little obsessive compulsive. Those are people who cannot get certain thoughts out of their head which can cause you to have insomnia and other problems. Think about trying some medication like Luvox. My son takes that and it has helped him a lot. It does not make him a zombie either. It just keeps him from getting stuck. Also, I have read many books on the brain and how it functions. "Change Your Brain, Change Your Life" was very insightful. This is not a character issue. It may be an overwork issue but that is also a symptom. Remember, no one ever says on their deathbed, "I wish I had spent more time at the office". Good Luck.
Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference between the things you love and the things you hate. I have a lot of energy, but now it's focused on something that can't make me happy. At least not more than one hour. I was fool when i chosed my job. That doesn't make me happy, just makes me forget how sad i am. Everything changes when i'm alone... I tried to change everything, music, lifestyle, food... At least now my body feels perfect. So i try to make my body satisfied. I'm doing those crazy dives, just to make me realize that i love life... Won't help...
