Random Insults

Discussion in 'Random Thoughts' started by marquis_de_odde, Sep 5, 2008.

  1. marquis_de_odde

    marquis_de_odde Member

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    The other day at work an old lady was complaining to me about one of the other girls,saying she had exacerbated a situation and then proudly told me she had called her a crepe hanger. She then asked if I knew what that was and when I admitted I had no clue told me black crepe used to be hung when something bad was happening so it was indeed someone who made a situation worse. Being very bored and a bit intrigued I urban dictionaried it to find the old lady had used this insult in a misguided way,the actual meaning is either someone who enjoys funerals or also someone who worries excessively because apparently the black crepe was hung by funeral directors and when concerned about getting things together on time they would hang it a bit early. Completely random but it got me thinking what other 19th century insults are out there. Sadly google has not given me an answer to my query so I thought perhaps some of you might know of some good ones,random insults not from the turn of the century are also welcome,I'm just finding it all quite amausing right now.
     
  2. praxiskepsis

    praxiskepsis ha!

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    My favorites!

    I have a book full of them!

    But I can't think of any right now :eek:
     
  3. Jimmy P

    Jimmy P bastion of awesomeness

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    http://www.insultmonger.com/

    lots of funny ones there. it's where I learn to swear in foreign languages. me cago en la leche!

    edit: god dammit, that's not the site I thought it was. there are some good ones for insults out there, though. gotta love the internet!
     
  4. Face Eater

    Face Eater Banned

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    "You should have been an abortion" is a good one but I try not to use it. With great power comes great responsibility.
     
  5. Jimmy P

    Jimmy P bastion of awesomeness

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    how about "the best part of you dried up on your momma's thigh"?
     
  6. IamnotaMan

    IamnotaMan I am Thor. On sabba-tickle. Still available via us

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    Midgetdick and Shitsandwich are two of mine currently.

    I mean I cant think of much worse than a shit sandwich.

    Actually some of u aint gonna believe it , but I actually feel quite bad after I get hurtful towards people.Sometimes certain conditions/tones cause it : (
     
  7. IamnotaMan

    IamnotaMan I am Thor. On sabba-tickle. Still available via us

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    Arab style insults are quite good.
    Like "May your wives be cursed with the breathe of a 1000 elephant farts"
     
  8. jackstraw316

    jackstraw316 Member

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    Here is one that has many applications

    ..... I'd rather jack off with a cheese grader or .... that's about as much fun as masterbating with a cheese grader
     
  9. heeh2

    heeh2 Senior Member

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    i feel bad for both people when i even witness something like that lol
     
  10. nakedtreehugger

    nakedtreehugger craaaaaazy

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    i am traumatized now. my finger had a run in with a cheese grater this morning... and the thought of it anywhere else... i'm curled in a fetal position now.
     
  11. heeh2

    heeh2 Senior Member

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    try imagining it on your penis....lol
     
  12. IamnotaMan

    IamnotaMan I am Thor. On sabba-tickle. Still available via us

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    I called someone a "monkey-cum gargler" once.
    I didn't think it up , it like came from divine intervention.Or maybe not...

    Whats that?Some misfit who works at the zoo, jerking off monkies that washing his mouth with a glass of it , rather than using Listerine...?

    One bloke became Leonardo da Vinci. I became a 1 man ( rubbish)swear word factory ; (
     
  13. Kinky Ramona

    Kinky Ramona Back by popular demand!

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    *tries to imagine NTH having a penis*
     
  14. kooljerk

    kooljerk Member

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    Think my favorite is..Theirs only one person uglyer than your girlfriend n thats your mother!....My Mums favorite was..May a bird of paradise fly up your nose!
     
  15. jackstraw316

    jackstraw316 Member

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    my bad.... I'll give you one to use next time someone erks you!!

    ok this one made me cringe.

    (background, I used to have this really cool dready friend who does INCREDIBLE patch work, anyways she was pissed at me one day and gave me the following reply)

    "Lick my sweaty TW*T".... .... the thought ick!!! don't get me wrong I don't mind doing, but not under those circumstances *gag*
     
  16. SpacemanSpiff

    SpacemanSpiff Visitor

    I like to use the words PUTZ...as in "your such a putz"
     
  17. hotwater

    hotwater Senior Member Lifetime Supporter

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    If you were thirsty, I wouldn’t offer you the sweat off my balls [​IMG]



    Hotwater
     
  18. SpacemanSpiff

    SpacemanSpiff Visitor


    Heres a good one from another thread
     
  19. Xac

    Xac Visitor

    Going back to old insults, son of a gun literally means bastard. On ships if a woman gave birth and the man was not known to be declared the father, one of the ships guns was named in its place.
     
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