I attract comedy. Funny and odd situations follow me. I do try to make most annoying or dull situations funny but there always seems to be something amusing around me. For example; Outside my friends house. It is 2am. I am topless because I spilled ice coffee on it and I didn't want to wear my friends blouse (I'm a dude can you blame me?). We were about half way though 5g of some beautiful, crystal covered, dense nugs we had got that day. We were chilling out the front, at the time, just finished a j and about to go roll another. So we stood up quickly wanting more (mistake) where the following took place. I have probably forgotten some of it, but shes filled some stuff in this morning. <-- wish I did.... Me: *falls headfirst into a shrub* "Babe, can you help me out" Abby: "Huh. Sure. Uh take off your pants" Me: "Crap what are they caught on?" Abby: "Nothing. Your ass looks cute. Not that you really have one, but you know when you see a tiny dog and you think. Wow when you give that a dog treat it would be awesome just to carry and eat it you know. Hey why you in there?" Me: "Get me out of here!" <--- Cliché much? Abby: "Why not" Me: "Who?" Abby: "What" Me: "I never said that" (etc) Abby: "This stuffs really good, you DO have a bum! Gosh everything is so pretty!" Me: "Really? My face is in DIRT." Abby: "It's not dirt!" Me: "Ok then. BARK!" Abby: "WOOF....Hehehe" Me: "Oh ow ow ow ow *making fuss*" Abby: "*Fussing while pulling me out* Oh babe you ok?" Me: "I think an ant bit me. Holy crap I was in a shrub! Abby we're on high alert." (You gotta be high for that one to be funny) After that we went inside and smoked some more. While laughing about what happened for a good hour . I think it would be cool just to share general amusing stories. C'mon guys. Crack me up.
Thats awesome xD Abby: "Huh. Sure. Uh take off your pants" Me: "Crap what are they caught on?" Abby: "Nothing. Your ass looks cute. Lol'd
Yeah I think marijuana has special powers of bringing funny things to you so you can laugh at it. Like one time me and my friend were walking down the street and I saw this guy who was so short, but he wasn't short enough to be a midget. Then I looked at his pants and the werent big enough for him. So I tell my friend "hey look how short that guy is, and his pants are still to small for him" and we laughed and laughed as the short man waddled away.
I was once getting high out my bedroom window with a friend at about midnight (i live on a quite street) when first we see two guys do lines off a car roof and spill all there coke. then we watch this random couple fuck in a car for two hours. we laughed the entire time and then the women saw us. i felt bad for watching.
Lol thats pretty crazy. Though sex in a car for 2 hours... Car sex gets pretty painful after a while, especially in a small car! Well the other day I injured myself, got some cracked ribs and some pretty freaky bruising. They put me on 60mg oxycodone. However they make me feel very sick. I tried everything to settle my stomach. Nothing worked. Anyway it was 12 30am when i decided to go for a walk in the night air to settle it down (parents away for week). I walk outside and see my sister (few years older) smoking a j. I never knew she smoked. Never even suspected it! It was really funny because she sees me and quickly drops it and i only just told her to wait in time, she was about to step on it! Anyway once she found out I smoked she offered to share what she had with me! It was pretty weird because my sister and I aren't very close. But we stayed out there for about an hour and a half and got REALLY stoned. I asked how much she had left and she said she still had 3 rolled and about a 1/4 left! So at this point we decided to roll another 3 and go for the walk I wanted to go on. We walked down to the park, and crossed a stream up a small hill to this nice seat where we sat and smoked the rest of the rolled joints except for 2, then decided to walk home. We got to the very narrow "bridge" which was really a foot wide plank across the stream and on the other side we see A "really big duck". Which my sister pointed out was really a goose! Apparently geese are REALLY territorial! Every time we approached it spread its wings, and chased us off!. We had no other way that we knew of of getting across the river. We were in no condition to go bush bashing! So we start brainstorming idea of how we could get across without hurting it, or it hurting us! Firstly I threw a stick hoping it would chase it. Note to self geese don't give a rats ass about stick. Just people. After several stupid ideas we decided that we might as well walk away and hide. Wait for it to leave and run across. So we light up our last joints when I had a brainwave. I took a deep draw from my J waled right up and blew the smoke towards the goose, hoping to scare it off (Its bushland, animals naturally fear fire and smoke right) It didn't, It went on attack mode. Running/flapping after me! So I bolt up the hill, and its still chasing me! After like a min of running around the clearing at the top of the hill I hear my sister yell out to me and I see she is across. So I run through a little bit of scrub and run flat out towards the plank bridge. I was very proud that I was running in what I thought to be a straight line. Then I got to the plank. What i thought to be a straight line ended up being a very fast wobble which saw me totally miss the bridge on the first step and fall into the stream. Not my finest hour! So I pick myself up and my sister and I run for about a hundred meters when we decide we lost it. After that we went home. Sat on a couch and ate chips watching black adder till early in the morning. It's strange, my sister and I have never really been close. But now we have something in common
those things are crazy man.. Once i was conoing with my freind and we went in the middle of like ten of them and they all started going apeshit just trying to beat us with theyre wings and shit.. its crazy
If they were anything like the one we faced you're lucky you weren't hurt! I another story I had forgotten about which is actually my favorite one My neighbors grandma (tough bad ass granny) She is about 85 had half a lung removed and decided to go to New Zealand on all the extreme adventure things, like jet boats and bungee jumping (see, tough ass granny). Anyway she gets quite confused and one day at a dinner party my and her family were all eating dinner when the older people were talking about "Youth of today"(lol). Somehow the topic got to "new, scary" drugs like Meth and how in "their day" the drugs were less scary and more manageable (I didn't have the stones to argue the point). Well this classic conversation ensued; Granny: "Gosh I don't know what they can do nowdays. Once these kids the those "Marra dew anas" into them they're uncontrollable. Her daughter: (about same age as my mother for reference) "You mean marijuana, You know, weed" Granny:*Shocked* "WHAT! Whats the fuss about? Weed ant never hurt anybody! Whats the problem with WEED?" At that point I think I saw my life flash before my eyes as I nearly died inhaling an un-chewed roast potato and had a "choking" fit to hide my laughter. Ahh... Good times.
i remember this one time a goose bit my mom right in the ass and took off a chunk of her pants/underwear and you could see a bit of her bare ass. it was funny.
I would just die of laughter! That is the perfect blend of comedy pain and bare assness to be awesome!
Thanks, I do my best . All the best stories seem to involve weed or no pants. Although have you ever tried explaining coming home minus your pants to your parents? I have. It's where the most quoted line of my life comes from. Dad: "WHAT? Oh. Come ON not again! Why do I buy you pants?"
