I was just wondering if anyone feels like I feel... I feel so much like i'm battling to be neither straight nor gay, like I can't be on either side because people treat me in a way that isn't right for me. If I date men, people say I'm just straight and experimenting, whereas if I date women people say I'm gay and in denial. I can't win. It frustrates me because I don't feel like I'm straight or gay. I've felt bi for a long time and I just wondered if there was anyone else who feels the same? xxx
I suspect your dilemma is quite common and all of us who identify as bi have experienced derision from others who can't grasp the concept. I have been called "confused" by gay male friends, and one gay acquaintance verbally attacked me for being in denial by "always" talking about being bi. It is OK for him or any faggy size-queen to be quite vocal about their latest exploit, but don't mention in a crowd of gay men that you bedded a girl or they think you are trying to be better than them. Such gay men piss me off more than straights who think homosexuality is a moral defect, because they should know better. Gay men who have been thru the misconceptions of ppl who don't have a clue about homosexuality should be more tolerant of ppl who have the capacity to love guys or girls. The problem is ppl try to extrapolate their own limitations onto others. Sometimes the only thing you can do is tell them to fuck off.
I get that shit, especially when hanging around frisco, or some of my bros friends. of course you cant be bi, apparently being bi means you are gay and in a half ass denial state. I thought I was gay for a while but then realized that I was actually bi, come now the realization that I should probubly be asexual like my hetero life partner.
Biphobia in gay people pisses me off. I can (sort of) understand it from straight people - not because they have any reason to be "afraid" as such, but they don't have any reason to think about sexuality in the terms of non-straights. But gay people, you'd think, would have the empathy not be so harsh on those of a different sexuality from their own. I'm pretty sure most of the animosity comes from the fact that a bi person might leave a gay man for *spit spit* A WOMAN, or just generally not being able to understand... but it's not an excuse. It's no better than a straight man thinking any woman who won't fuck him is a lesbian.
It didn't click that that was how I felt for a long time. I just thought well I've got no problem liking women or men, I just don't like being considered straight or gay because ...welll I'm not. Some gay people I know went through that period of coming out to themselves and they asssume I never had to do that because I like men as well (so by their count, I'm not properly gay... I'm still in the "safe" zone). It makes me angry! Rant over. Argh. x
Yeah I get my friends acting really surprised when I say a girl is attractive becuase i've dated guys my whole life. But one of my friends is in the same boat, so we kinda get mad at other people together for it
Forget what the masses say, bisexuality exists to some extent in just about everyone. Though it is very uncommon for an individual to take no preference at all to either gender, there are many who are (or would be) comfortable having a sexual encounter with either gender. Given how complex and diverse your sexuality really is, it can be hard to label it when given only three popular categories - especially since our sexuality is ever-developing! Just as we have mood swings and experience highs and lows our sexuality does just the same thing - you may feel sexually frustrated, you may feel turned off or horny. Some days you may fancy fish, others you just want a bit of cheese.
