This is just a little something I just wrote on the spur of the moment. I don't even know what my inspiration was, but I'd just like some feedback. Tell me what you think, don't be afraid to hurt my feelings! The silk that was her skin never ceased to amaze him. He took a thick strand of raven hair from her face, where it danced madly, like a coven of witches on their Sabbat, in the wind, and tucked it safely behind her ear. Like a Crow she had past lives rooted in the deep cauldrons that were her pupils, flickering and glinting when it was convenient. She smelled of lilacs and rosemary and he smelled of earth and musk. Their auras mingled and intertwined ravenously with each other. She was his Crone, his wise one, his Mother and Maiden. Like Mother Holle she would always be there at the bottom of his holy well. She was the pure and unadulterated essence of his being. Her fingers snaking along the spine of his back like the all-wise Serpent, holding secrets that were kept just for him. He was always more than willing to partake of her infinite knowledge. The fire of the Sun was contained in his body. His skin radiated the deep red glow of the sunset and his hair was the mud after the refreshing rain. His hands, strong and calloused, held tightly, keeping her earthed so she wouldn't simply fly away. In his strong and gentle grasp she felt safe and steady, like one of the learned Sycamore. In the setting of his sun, he illuminated her beauty. Together they shone a beautiful light and together they basked in it. He, her glorious hunter god. She, his magnificent wise goddess.
That's pretty hot, I can't really give you much criticism because I really liked it and you should definitely try and post it somewhere more official if you wanna get into publishing, I think that prose/poem would be a good start, but to me it almost sounds like a part of a longer story. I liked imagery cos I'm kinda covinced you know a lotta shit and spur-of-the-moment art incorporated with a great deal of knowledge is probably the best kind.
Thanks man! Careful or you'll make me get a really big head. I really felt like there could have been more to it as well, though, I've never been very good at writing any kind of story. I've stuck to poetry and the like because I just don't have the attention span it takes to write anything longer. Maybe I'll try with this one though.
