Curious about my girlfriend's orgasms..

Hey all, I've been getting confused lately as my girlfriend's orgasms have changed significantly over the past couple of months.

They used to be VERY frequent (as in every 30 or so seconds of intercourse, 5-10 minutes oral), legs shaking, strong vaginal clenching.. although she says they were weak orgasms.

They are now not so frequent (takes 30-60 minutes oral, rarely intercourse), although much much stronger according to her, making her sit up, legs clamp and whatnot, however, no shaking or no vaginal clenching.

Now I'm confused as to why they've changed, I would of guessed maybe she's not as into me as she was, however she initiates it more than ever and are sex life is alot more active and open now (in terms of communication, playing out fantasies etc0).

The only things I can think of are that when we first met she was taking speed and drinking alot when she was going out which was every other day, also she wasn't eating properly.

She also has an eating disorder, could this be the cause of the orgasm's changing? it was very bad when we first met but she is eating healthily now.

Thankyou

 

Thoughts: There could be elements of faking in the beginning making her orgasms seem stronger than they were

She could be more relaxed now and isn't in such a rush to cum that she was in the beginning. Subsequently, the sex lasts a lot longer allowing her to have a more fulfilling kind of orgasm.

 

multiple drugs and the eating disorder could easily be the cause individually, let alone combined.

 

I'm agreeing with Dangermoose on this one. I bet she was faking to begin with. You can fake vaginal contractions and it's pretty hard to get off in such a short time.

 

gah...There was me thinking I was a genius with my cock, I'll ask her if she was faking it as it is making me doubt myself at the moment.

Although I do beleive the eating disorder/drugs have something to do with it.

Thanks for the responses, any other opinions on the matter?

 

Umm I doubt it was the speed. If it helps when I used to take coke I used to find it really hard to orgasm, I think its the same with all stimulants. So I agree with Dangermoose and sarahrei. I mean an orgasm every thirty seconds. You gotta be fucking kidding me right?

 

You did mention your sex life is a lot more open now, including in terms of communication. So you could just go ahead and ask her. Do it curiously, and let her know that you're glad that they've gotten stronger, she's initiating lots, all that good stuff.

One word of caution... be careful about how you ask if she was faking it. When we doubt ourselves, we can get accusatory, and while what others have said may well be right, it's not worth risking a big relationship blow-up over what a few people on a message board say. I don't mean it as any offense to those who posted, but just that you've got a long-term relationship going here, and self-doubt can be a dangerous thing. Don't let it take root too deeply.

 

I just didn't think it was easy to fake vaginal contractions, red face, veins coming out etc even if it was every 30 seconds there are people out there that have them in far less time! and I just can't understand why she would want to fake it so often, she was hardly telling me to stop afterwards so it wasn't like she was trying to get it over and done with.

To dspiel, I will approach it tactfully! The main reason I haven't bought it up is that I hate making her feel bad/upset, it is a serious long-term relationship and would hate to risk it, even if it is making me slightly unhappy.

Thanks

 

I can fake vaginal contractions easily. I do them everyday to keep the strength in them strong. 30 seconds is a VERY short time for a orgasm. Even when I do it myself I take longer then that. I think she may not have been able to get off with you to begin with and she didn't want you too feel bad. It's a pretty common myth that the only reason why women fake it is because we want it over with. Women fake it so you don't feel bad too.

 

ah, if that is the case then she was also lie'ing to me about how good it was, better to find out now that she's a liar than later on lol

Thankyou

 

Sex always changes over time anyway.

Are their issues in your relationship?

 

Yeah, sex DOES change with time.
Plus, how does that have to be lying about how good it is? It may well have been mind-blowingly wonderful sex then, and continue to be mind-blowingly wonderful sex now. If the sex were bad, she wouldn't want to keep going, orgasms or not. I'm very leery of how easily this sort of thing can blow up into a huge relationship issue...

 

In my experience, speed can cause the symptoms you first described.

 

Everything has the potential to turn into huge relationship issues.

Sex used to be our main issue. Thank god those days are over

 

sex with you was a novelty at first. can't stay that way forever.

 

faking. Anyhow, this is a question for a doctor

 

I don't want to accuse her of anything that isn't true, but I'm betting she was faking at first. I have faked before and you can fake everything...even strong vaginal contractions. It's practically unheard of the have an orgasm that often.
I have an eating disorder too and I'm in school to be a nurse and eating disorders pretty much kill your libido over time (well, typically).

 

Is this what you call tactful ?

 

there are usually a lot of outside factors that can impact a person's orgasms and sex life in general. i'd assume it's pretty normal for someone to go from having very frequent, weaker orgasms to having stonger, less frequent ones if their life has taken a turn of any kind.

I dunno, just my guess

 

girls fake orgasms early on with new partners because we want YOU to cum. it turns us on and we know giving us orgasms turns you on. slippery slope, huh?! lol

she was probably faking but DONT TAKE IT PERSONALLY. you have to understand she was only doing it to please you. be happy she is finally orgasming for real and its all YOUR doing.