Hi.. my first post.. my intro. Sorry if it rambles, I've got a lot to say. The psychedelic, drug-using community is one I've been wanted to get involved with over the past few months. I think the colloquial term is "shaman" to mean someone who considers drugs.. serious? or.. can be used for growth. My home computer broke about 6 weeks ago. I didn't bother fixing it because I realized I was surfing the net almost addictively, without thinking, reasoning or growth. At the same time creative interests were harbored within me, but whenever I tried to express, I felt tremendous depression and quickly moved away to some quick fix (video games, pornography, exercise or what have you. but nothing serious, just quick fixes to pull my mind out of a loop that it would get stuck in). I bought some pot a few weeks later. I've smoked before, it's been pretty damn cool and has pulled me out of depression and into a nice manic, creative state where I'm very happy and feel "in tune" with life. I smoked about four hits one night, and then I started talking and writing. And I told myself, it felt like a separate personality but I realized it was the "real" me and my first personality was a shell. I told myself "I Irrational, I am incapable of thinking rational thoughts, I am the Artist and I am taking control", and I understood it to be my life. I think this was the creative side in me saying I'm tired of wasting my time not making stuff and that I was going to make things. So I've been smoking and writing.. uncovering some weird things about myself, some scary things, running through some interesting thoughts and most importantly, doing something about them by writing. There's more; I mean, I've got other stories to tell, some weird-dreams, my first time meditating and the non-psychedelic "beauty shock" I've experienced many times. Well I'd like to share some of my writings with you wonderful guys and gals, I'll go ahead and put one here in this post.. hope that's ok. I want to say.. I'm not trying to pimp my writings.. I wrote this stuff and I want to see what other people who think; think about it. Good/bad. It's probably stuff you've learned before. It's stuff I've heard before but never learned until recently, and now I'm learning it.. ..the night I had the "I am the Artist" revelation, I picked up Zen in the Art of Writing by Ray Bradbury. He says "You must become so drunk on writing that reality cannot destroy you". I mention this in this writing.. In all honesty, I am NOT in this frame of mind at time of posting, the frame of mind to understand the rationalization of the imagination, the nature of the universe, the mind, etc. I'm trying to find that frame of mind again, and expand it, and I think you can help me, and I hope I can help you, somehow, either with my writings or conversation or friendship.. so this is a leap into the hip forums, please welcome me Rise from your Grave 13: he acceptance of loss is necessary for gain in the future believing that loss will repeat itself uncontrollably indicates your mind has been set to believe in failure when a mind believes in failure, it will not try it's hardest to succeed because it simply does not see the irrational future of success as possible if at every failure the mind accepted the current state of reality as "fact", it would cease trying. so, it is when we give up belief in victory that we stop trying to succeed. when there is no difficulty and we believe in success, we act and are successful when there is difficulty beyond our skill, we will fail if believe in failure when there is difficulty beyond our skill, we must make our skill something new: something better and something more so, standards cause improvement when the standards are above the status quo. similarly, standards can cause the downgrading of ability whenever the standard is beneath the current ability: the ability atrophies from lack of care, responsibility to adhere to a standard is removed so the ability can and will naturally fade out over time as the mind becomes accustomed to keeping the ability at it's new standard. impossible standards are standards which can never be reached. but many standards can be reached only if the reality surrounding them is destroyed and in it's place a new reality must be created. "Reality will destroy you, "therefore destroy Reality" with it, create a new one. With the observation of practicing creative effort we can destroy that which is and create that which is not. to do this we must believe in our ability to destroy reality. regardless of "actual" ability, whatever we have will be tied to our belief. our beliefs can supersede our "actual" abilities, so a newly created state becomes the new "actual" and the present becomes the past and is destroyed. thus old states are superseded by new states, by force. the force behind this stems from our standards. standards stem from what we care about what we care about stems from what we accept as acceptable. every human acquires what they need. every human acquires what they need based on what they think they need. every human acquires what they need based on what they think they need based on what they think they want. what a human thinks they want is determined by the human. this decision is a force which turns what is not into what is and changes what is into what is not so that the new what is may be. the action comes from the practice of observation and then rejecting the observation to allow for the creative imagination to become the reality which is observed so, reality is rejected and recreated with the application of force. violence then, rules the universe! the most violent will reach their goals. the shrewd will conquer. the wise will survive. take heed. it is simple for a man or woman to disregard the right acceptance of loss and instead turn acceptance of loss into accepting a future which is identical to the present. this future identical to the present shows a stagnation of action by the memorying observer, who is no longer observing an imagination but observing reality, and accepting it. this is denial of the imagination and the acceptance of the real outside as the only real for outside. the real irrational imagination within is not accepted. through the application of force what we see is what is. the more our irrational creative thought differs, through number and difficulty of execution triggers, the more force must be applied to create our imagination in the real world. to apply more force, you need more will. to have more will, you must have a higher standard of "what you want" to be "what you must". wanting is not enough, as all want success with a flippant thought. only the application of force demonstrates a "must" as the want is indicated as a "must", so much that force applied indicates "must" rather then "want". wanting without the application of force is "wishful thinking" and ONLY wishful thinking. this is the irrational imagination remaining un-believed and un-excecuted. we create our own standards and follow our standards to create reality. our standards are defined by what we define as "must". wants are irrelevant to reality beyond difficulty. needs are what drive us to destroy difficult reality and create intentional reality. our act of willpower. responsibility MUST BE TAKEN in order for STANDARDS TO BE IMPLEMENTED! it is the fall of many to refuse the violence of taking responsibility, leaving responsibility instead to an irrational imagination: God is responsible for my life, Family is responsible for my life, OTHER people are responsible for my life, MY LOVER is responsible for my life. this weakness reminds me of children clinging to their parents for fear of having to accept responsibility. we start off with no belief and no standard of responsibility. it is with the application of force that will power is created. will power is created in reality as it is applied that which is not applied is not will power - it is an uncreated delusion. only the delusions which are created are shown to be real! SO THEN, CREATE YOUR DELUSIONS! OBLITERATE CURRENT REALITY CREATE YOUR NEW REALITY TO ACHIEVE YOUR STANDARDS!
Nice writings but you'd probably get better feedback and so forth on your writings or your "thoughts" as it were if you were to post it in the writers forum.. http://www.hipforums.com/newforums/forumdisplay.php?f=26 or you could start a journal... either way... Welcome...
