I was an only child, and so was my fiancee. We both agree that it was a pretty lonely way to grow up. Not only do you not have any brothers or sisters, but consequently, you don't have any nieces, nephews, brothers and sisters in law, and so on. We both agreed that we didn't want our child (who is now 8 months old) to grow up that way-well, we did something about that pretty quick, as Justyna is now 5 months pregnant with our second child! There are, of course, some advantages to growing up as an only child-you don't have any brothers or sisters to fight with, or their extended families either. Sometimes I realize that's a good thing. My parents later in life decided they didn't give a rat's ass about me, or whther they ever heard from me or not, which I suppose is an unusual thing for an only child. It's not like I'm the black sheep of the family-I'm the only sheep. It shouldn't surprise me, though, because that's the way my parents treated their own parents-why should they treat me any differently? But I honestly think that the whole concept of the family is becoming less and less important to a whole lot of Americans, anyway. So, I've developed the attitude that your 'family' consists of the people that care about you and act like they do, not necessarily those that are blood related to you.
one of my former best friends is an only child and she's fucked up about her parents. her dumb ass decided to get married at twenty years old and instead of moving into her husband's house, she made him move into her bedroom at her parents' place. they haven't a physical relationship bc its just creepy (or would be to me) to have sex while your parents are in the next room. she told him that maybe in a few years they'll put their own trailer in her mom and dad's yard so she can spend her days with them and still be close. i don't know. maybe i'm being judgmental. its great that she loves her parents so much, but i think if you're that resistant to moving out then you shouldn't be getting married. its not fair to her hubby or her parents. he gets no sex and they don't pay rent or buy groceries to her parents. am i being a bitch or does anyone else find that strange?
My wife and I are both only children. I used to think it was a good thing, but now I'm not so sure. America is on such a huge "family is everything" kick that it makes me feel like a freak. People seem to put less of a priority on their friends than they used to.
I was an only child but never felt lonely. I suppose it was because of the community where I grew up in the 50s. Everyone had an open door policy and so we kids wandered in and out of each others homes. There was always an adult to look out for us and big life events, marriage, birth, death etc. were shared experiences. I remember the days being so long and full we barely stopped to eat. Of course we were considered to be a slum part of town, so eventually the old houses were replaced by a more clinical environment and our community split. My kids have never known that kind of freedom, this seems to be the age of the nuclear family. I had a good mother who disciplined me when needed but also allowed me to discover stuff for myself. I would have liked a brother, but not now. My husband was the eldest of six siblings and in adulthood the only time they came together was for funerals, they just weren't close. All in all I loved my childhood, thanks to my mother.
My ex friend was an only child, and boy was she selfish, she wanted everything others had, she borrowed our clothes, make up, but let one person touch anything of hers! big sulk time lol, and she had to be the centre of attention all the time, needless to say that's why shes an ex friend, I'm not saying all only children are this way, but I do think at least one bro or sis is good, teaches you to share and stuff.I have 4 bros and one sis.
I was (and am! I feel so young compared to you guys) pretty lonely. I had to learn social skills during school and it was a little hard for me.
My daughter is an only child due to circumstances beyond our control. So we usually had her cousins around, which was good for them too as their mother had abandoned them. They even lived with us for a year or so, and after the novelty wore off, my daughter had to learn to share everything. She is now 24 and probably one of the most generous, responsible, well adjusted members of our family.
I find that, strange. I know someone else who is an only child and although not married (engaged), got his girlfriend to move in with him and his parents. His parents are controlling as shit, and it's all around a uncomfortable situation. I just couldn't do it, must be said. Sends shivers down my spine thinking about it!
Does he resist? I found that hard, but very worthwhile. No matter how much my parents wanted to maintain control, once I had my own income and my own place to live, there was really nothing they could do.
I'm an only child as well, but not because my parents didn't want more children. I should've had an older brother, but he was born 3 months too early and sadly didn't survive. After I was born my mother got quite sick and she was unable to have anymore children. The odd thing is that when I was a kid and my mother asked if I wanted a brother or a sister, I used to say "No thank you, I can play by myself quite well..." :coolgleamA: Now, though, I wish I would've had a sibling or two or three, since as a child and even a teen i was quite lonely. I'm lucky that my parents aren't controlling, and even if they were, they couldn't really know what I'm doing, since we live in different cities for 9 months out of the year...
